Cycling Upon a Million Lives (Or At Least It Feels That Many)

The first time that Gideon met Roze, he felt like he had to do something. After all, he was a decent enough guy. He had played his fair share of games in being the hero. He didn’t have a courageous bone in his body, but his Time Stop power would make up for it, right?

He stared at the girl he happened upon in a shop, a dead and uncaring gaze in her eyes like she was being forced to waste every moment on meaningless things. It was obvious that she was being taken advantage of, given the attitude of the merchant and how submissive her responses were. The situation felt much like his own, before he had gained a sense of freedom in this world from a mysterious power.

Perhaps, he had simply gotten over the honeymoon period of messing around with Time Stop, aimlessly burning through the same stretch of time over and over.

Maybe, he was looking for some purpose in being here. After all, he had no dreams or aspirations. He couldn’t. Any effort he made toward them would be wiped out and reset once the countdown reached zero. That was the exchange he made for becoming free.

“Take my hand.”

The girl looked at him like he was a nuisance. There was no reason for her to think otherwise.

“Go on, I’m taking you away from here. Be free, like me.”

Now, it was the merchant’s turn to overhear and become annoyed. He called for his guards, but before they approached Gideon, they were suddenly thrown back by an invisible force.

“I won’t let them tell you what to do anymore.”

Roze, he learned was her name, stared in wonder as they casually strolled out of the shop, all resistance trying to stop them being simply tossed away like they were nothing.

A feeling of being ‘untouchable’ stirred Gideon’s heart. Little did he know, the simple girl that he saved was in possession of a rare magic, the very thing that was a blessing and a curse for him.

Happenstance turned into fate in his mind, and thus, they went on a journey to find out more about her heritage. By themselves, they made a beeline straight for Clockenspiel, finding little resistance along the way.

While he could not defeat the strange giant that guarded the area, he could still bring the legendary books that were useful to Roze, avoiding the issue altogether. But knowing the secret spells did not help her at all. She found herself incapable of using them.

She lacked the sense of will, the purpose, the intent. To her, Time magic was like a language no one used. Gideon felt dismayed. He thought his actions were helping her, but apparently, it hadn’t at all. As he felt his time coming to an end, the realization hit him.

Doing everything for her was no help at all. She was still as weak as before, too weak to even stand on her own.

He woke up at the start of another cycle, a bitter taste in his mouth for leaving behind someone that couldn’t survive without him. Roze had been just like his former self –frozen unless pushed forward, left behind while others moved on, and wasting away on excuses.

His whole involvement with Roze hadn’t considered her but was decided on pure self-satisfaction. It was roleplay as a hero, all fun and games at best.

“I haven’t grown up at all, have I?”

Being forced into adulthood didn’t mature him. Having all the freedom to choose hadn’t either. He was on top of the world, master of his time-limited destiny, but he was no wiser because of it.

He was no different than being stuck at his dead-end job, eventually making the same motions, going through the same cycles, time and time again.

How could he truly break free then? What would it take for him to do something meaningful with his life? There was only one answer as he stared at his time ticking down.

“It’s no longer about me.”

What would Roze need going forward, long after he was gone?

Travel companions? It took him quite a few tries to find the right ones. But he would find worthy ones.

A sense of direction? He would tease her with the answers but not outright provide them. Learning for herself would bring about hope.

Independence? Validation of her own talents became the cornerstone of his agenda. He saw the potential of her greatness.

The journey to Clockenspiel became a training plan in his mind, tuned with every attempt of a cycle. But its actual execution ended up far more fun than he realized.

v

The different cycles that Gideon went through flashed before Roze’s mind. She watched in awe as he got himself into plenty of trouble, sometimes failing over the silliest of things. She saw his successes piling up, little by little, until they had all lined up for this current attempt.

Though barely a minute had passed by, Roze felt like she had lived many lifetimes over. The information she received was so overwhelming that all she could do was close her eyes.

“You idiot, Gideon. You damn liar. You, you…”

Roze clutched the magical mark that was the only trace of Gideon left. Tears rolled down her eyes as the weight of everything she saw took hold. Despite her cursing, she knew it was just part of his personality. The best efforts of someone were often kept hidden, unappreciated and unnoticed until after the fact. He embodied it in the way he used his power. He embraced the idea that someone else should be the starring role, content on being her support. The thing that frustrated her to no end though was that he,

“…never told me it took that many times.”

Far from the ‘several’ that Gideon had implied, he had spent a countless number of repeats figuring things out. It was a maddening span of time even, if it weren’t for the fact that he was smiling just as much in those cycles as the Gideon she knew.

He hadn’t lied when he said it. That he enjoyed every bit of his repeated journey. Along the way, he found plenty of things to look forward to, little joys to anticipate.

Every cycle is different.

Even with prior knowledge, the possibilities were still infinite. The same thing could be seen in many different ways, approached to yield different outcomes. The thing that mattered was his state of mind.

A task no longer becomes tedious when it invokes a sense of joy. The most interesting thing in the world could still put one to sleep.

By finding his own purpose, Gideon had finally started enjoying life. And now, he had done everything he could to ensure that Roze would have a running start as well.

There was only one problem.

“It’s not fair. You get to see me again and again. But me? You’ve left me behind!”

Roze wouldn’t forgive him. She wouldn’t forgive the fact that she couldn’t see him again. So what if they couldn’t find a spell to save him? So what if he had given up on that?

Gideon had never given up on her, so it was now up to her to return the favor. She turned to the others – Milipitas, Ferdinand, and Raffaelo. It was more than just her that he had helped. The ripples in time that he created flowed into the result that they had now.

“Everyone! Give me a hand looking through these archives! Let me know if you find anything at all that could give me some ideas on how to use Time magic in another way!”

She needed fresh ideas, novel concepts, and different minds to escape the box that she had molded herself in. Just like Gideon, she refused to give up after a single failure.

They all nodded, seeing the determination in her eyes. She would likely never leave until something could be done. They split off to add their own perspectives as well – forged by their own experiences, however limited they may be.