In the veil nobody can hear your screams

“Lyra mentioned to me that you were about to throw your dinner into the veil. Do you have anything to say in your defense?” Said Howard, with a stern voice.

While he tried to admonish me, a barrage of thoughts went through my head.

Apparently, my experiment was quite a dangerous idea, and Lyra had immediately gone to snitch on me after leaving me back in the infirmary. The only good side to the situation is that in doing so she gave me enough time to give a good read to the start of the book before Howard arrived.

“They are lying, and surely, they are lying to you too.” the notebook said.

To be honest, when I read it I felt chills on my spine. Regardless of the lackluster hospitality from Lyra, I actually had a very good impression of this place thanks to Howard. After I ashamed myself with the stairs incident, he took very good care of me. I had assumed that such kindness was a generalized feeling around here even if they all avoided my gaze when I walked around.

The idea that I was not safe here… made a certain voice resonate in my head, around and around, again and again.

“Is the sacrifice awake?”

That was all I heard, and honestly, I thought I had dreamed it. But if I did hear it, then what the notebook may be warning me about could be far more dire than I ever imagined. If that’s how things are, then my priority should be getting away from here as soon as I am fully healed.

And for that, I need to figure out how to get out of the village.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know it was dangerous. I just wanted to figure out what that darkness was” I responded, finally.

“And how does sticking meat into it relate to figuring it out?” Asked Howard, clearly, not yet understanding my complex train of thought.

“I was just curious, ok? Nobody explained anything to me and talking to Lyra is like talking to a wall. I have asked her again and again, and she doesn’t even acknowledge me. The only time she did was to call you and I think that was only to get me in trouble.” I said, glad of finally getting that out of my chest.

Howard was irritated, his hands on his face, pinching his nose just below where a pair of glasses would be, but his hands found nothing in there.

“Fine, you do have a point. I have not explained anything to you. Although I expected that Lyra would have explained it all by now” Howard concluded, finally, with a sigh.

“How could she? She doesn’t even speak english” I said, pointing at her, wondering how Howard expected anything to come out of this.

Howard looked at Lyra with what I can only describe as a deeply unimpressed look. The eyes' version of “really?”.

What surprised me the most, was how deeply unaffected she was by it. She didn’t even turn to look back at him.I could almost admire that level of spine, in a way.

“Whatever, just follow me. It’s easier to show you than to explain it. Honestly, that may be the only way for you to believe it” He said, going to the door, signaling me to follow him.

The three of us went to the opposite side of the village, to a point where there was another expanse of darkness surrounding the light stones of the border. Howard stopped me far away from the darkness, as if he wanted to prevent me from jumping into it or something.

“These things we call veils. They are materializations of pure darkness, and can only be dispelled with a light stone like these ones. Usually the veils come and go, but there are places where they are permanent, and unfortunately, the village happens to be surrounded by three of them.”

Howard explained it while taking out a very small pebble from the border, small enough that he could hold it on the tip of two of his fingers. Slowly, he approached it toward the veil. Before it touched it, the darkness receded around it.

“As you can see, inside the veil there’s more space, just like outside it. The problem is… actually, can you come here?” Howard said, this time, grabbing me by the scruff of my neck and pushing me just in front of the veil. “This may be a little scary, but if you are going to live around here, this is a sensation that you will need to get accustomed to. Stick your head in the veil, just where I’m holding the light stone.”

I looked at him, full of distrust, but he simply looked at me with a very stern look. I felt like I could not trust him, I should not, but on the other hand… he has been nothing but kind to me this whole time. At the very least, I can believe that he would not tell me to do this if it would get me hurt, right?

I stuck my head in the space illuminated by the stone, very slowly, until my head was basically below the hand that held it.

“Now, don’t panic, simply retreat when it happens. You’ll feel a sensation like you are in a void, or to be more precise, you’ll feel absolutely nothing. It will be scary, but it will be safe, I promise” He said, finishing his explanation by pinching my cheek, and immediately, retreating the stone back from the veil.

The moment my head stayed in the darkness, it was as if I had been decapitated. I could feel nothing from my neck upwards.

I could no longer feel his hand on my cheek. I had closed my eyes, but when I opened them, absolutely nothing had changed. It was as if there was no difference, it was pitch black always. Before, I could hear the rustling of my clothes when moving, the low murmur of the people far away preparing for something, but now it was absolute silence. Maddening silence.

I must have stayed with my head in there for a couple of seconds, but it felt like I had been there, far, far too long. I literally jumped back, terrified, falling in my ass before Howard could grab me.

Probably because he still had his hand busy pinching my cheek.

The deep sensation of fear did not recede. Why? Why would he do this to me? I knew I could not trust him.

I slapped back Howard’s hand when he tried to reach me. I was trying to get away from them, both Howard and Lyra looking at me with concern.

It took a while, but eventually, I felt their voices starting to reach me again.

“Breathe Pole, breathe. In, and out.” Howard said, gesticulating deep breaths, giving up on touching me.

I tried to breathe as he said and after a couple of minutes, I calmed down again.

My five senses were there, as if they had never left. I could see, as clearly as one could say in the everpresent dim light of the village, at least. I could hear Howard, now asking me if I was okay. I could feel the ground below me, always there, a certainty that I should take for granted.

And finally, I felt a hand in my head, from Lyra, whose concerned expression slowly morphed back into disdain and indifference when I turned around to look at her.

“I know it was scary, but sometimes, the anticipation of something scary can be worse than the event itself. I thought this would be the best way to experience it but, I guess I still have a lot to learn. I’m sorry Pole” He said, apologizing, scratching his head with the hand without the light pebble.

It was considered that was enough experimentation for the day. I was still a bit shook by the experience, but Howard still took the chance to explain what had happened.

“When you enter a veil, you lose your five senses. You can’t hear anything, see anything, nor feel anything. If you go back into the light it’s inoffensive, it starts out scary but eventually it will simply be a very disorienting sensation.”

As we arrived back, I sat down, not wanting to deal with him anymore. I wanted to say so to him, but I also felt like I didn't have the energy to do so.

“I’ll show you later, but to make it short. It’s impossible to know about anything that’s going on in the darkness. If you are alone you will be fine, but if there was something inside the veil, you would never be able to know it. That’s why putting meat in them could be dangerous, after all, you may attract something with it.” Howard finalized, standing up.

Maybe he had finally catched the fact that I did not want him around, and so he apologized again and left. I was once again alone with Lyra, who did not care in the least if I wanted her around or not.

Can I trust her? Can I trust Howard? My gut feeling screams no with ever growing insistence, but until my hands stop trembling, and while Lyra is a watchful eye over me, I can’t do anything.

Out of options, I lay down, and turned around to not see her while I tried to sleep. I do not trust her, but at the very least I know that if she wanted me dead, she could have done the deed several times already. So, she could have my back, if she insisted on staying.

I lost the notion of time, but eventually, I managed to fall into an uneasy sleep.