Five-Star Customer Service

“Thank you so much, honored customer, for supporting this wonderful cause!”

The past month was spent training and preparing for this exact moment.

All those hours training my magic was about to be tested today.

I bowed a comfortable ninety degrees.

“Oh, you’re too kind!” the lady trilled. She swept off down the land with three brand-new Moonboxes clutched to her chest. “Cute dog, too!”

The orphanage dog woofed in response, its tongue lolling. Yes, I brought him along. No, it wasn’t supposed to be for security. For most businesses, dogs made for excellent client mood enhancers.

Though… this dog was doing an impressive job of not really being a dog quite well. It never ever did things of its own will. Dunno if it’s discipline or that there’s not a lot going on up there…

As part of the plan, I’d volunteered to run the stall; partly to balance the cosmic scales after last week’s fiasco with Alexandria, partly because I suspected my best polite-Japanese shop-clerk voice would melt coin purses to earn us some extra coin on the side. 

I earned a lot of brownie points when I negotiated for so many vegetables. So when I suggested this crazy plan to Mother Martha, all she could do was say yes.

All the other kids betted against me about this blowing up in my face, including Uriel.

All I could say was: Piper was about to be one very rich girl.

[SALARYMAN STATUS SCREEN]

[The Orphanage] Today's Gold Gain! +140

Net Assets: +540

Net Liabilities: -150

Days till orphanage runs out of resources: 5 days -> 2 weeks

Salaryman Grade: A -

Keep up the good work~!

Who knew being a Japanese service worker would make you a bonified salesman innovator in a fantasy world?

Unfortunately, I started to notice something fishy when I looked into the distance. 

Right on cue, huh?

Something about our latest “customers” coming up smelled so bad it interrupted my musings, however.

Their clothes were too clean. Their boots were too sophisticated. And throughout all my years connecting with others, you get this sixth sense… being able to tell apart the good and those with bad faith.

While they dressed like they were in a gang, they clearly don’t cut from the same cloth. Faces were a little too smooth for people who supposedly rough it on East Gate’s poorest parts.

I turned, still wearing my brightest retail grin. “Welcome! How may—”

“So,” the gang member drawled, eyeing the display, “the orphanage’s letting Crystal Elves hawk trinkets now? Thought your kind was above this… embarrassing work.”

“Customer service is a noble profession.”

His buddy, a thick-necked human with a brand-new cloak, snorted.

They began stepping closer. Way too close to respect my personal space.

“Gentlemen,” I said, softer, “I’m happy to answer questions, but please respect the queue.”

“There is no queue,” the frontman sneered. “Just you, freak.”

He feinted—fast—but I’d been expecting it. I slid half a step right, his fist carving air where my chin had been. The table rattled; Moonboxes clinked like startled wind-chimes.

“A-Ah,” I said, forcing cheer into my voice, “sampling durability, I see?”

A small crowd gathered… real customers, curious gawkers. I heard the orphanage dog growl.

The human thug rubbed his knuckles. “Quit being clever.”

“Can’t,” I said, finally letting the smile drop. “Chronic condition.”

He swung again.

To an almost inch-perfect degree, I dodged; head tilting just enough to feel the wind of his fist graze past my cheek.

As predicted…

The very sight of me had triggered the thugs. But I'd planned for that.

That was my cue.

“Delta Echo!!” I shouted.

From behind the stall, under the cart, out from alley corners—the orphanage kids came.

A tsunami tide of teens and kids plus nuns exploded into the square! 

“RAAAAAA!!”

The thug in front of me blinked. That split-second of hesitation was all I needed. I summoned mana, unstable as it was, and released the conjuration.

[Basic Frostbite!]

A basic spell. Governed not by skill (which I lacked, thinking back to the infamous White Flame incident), but by your grip on mana reserves.

Luckily for me, I apparently had plenty of that.

The blast hit him square in the chest. The thug squealed, stumbling like someone had poured ice water into his veins. For a moment, I actually thought it slowed his bloodstream. His eyes glazed, his arms sagged.

He went down.

His buddy didn’t take that lying down though.

I wasn’t ready for it. Not mentally nor emotionally.

He threw the Moonboxes. The ones that took ages to make!

And they hit me like bricks. One slammed into my ribs. Another clipped my shoulder. The last one smacked me square in the forehead and launched me backward, straight into the orphanage’s back wall.

Everything rang. My teeth rattled. My back thudded. I tasted metal.

I blinked just in time to see the bastard climbing the table, crouched like he was about to finish the job—

“GET DOWN HERE!”

Piper’s tail whipped out from behind and snared his ankle mid-leap.

WHAM.

Face, meet ground.

Serves you right!! I gave him a good kick just for same measure. He groaned in response.

The other goons weren’t doing much better. A few had already been dogpiled by the orphans. One of the goons got tripped. Another fell under a pile of enraged teens.

But then, I heard Mother Martha’s shrill cry.

“NO!!”

A glint. One of them had pulled a dagger.

Right in front of a kid. There was no hesitation. He slashed forward.

I saw the cuts. Chest. Face. Shallow, but red.

The child screamed.

“COLLINS! Stand down!”

The one holding the blade froze.

“You…” Their leader jabbed a finger at me, still limping from the Frostbite. “You’ll get what’s coming for siding with them. You all will!”

What did he mean by that?

“You can try. But the whole town sees you for who you really are now.”

At that, he balked. Shaking his head, he started walking away.

“Come, men.”

And in a few long, long seconds of staring at the assailants, they started disappearing into the distance.

None of us were celebrating yet.

I rushed over to the kid who’d been slashed… but before I could kneel, a soft glow lit the scene.

Daisy already beat me to it.

Her palms pressed to the wounds, a shimmer of light dancing across the skin. Healing magic.

The blood slowed. The cuts closed.

For someone who delights in seeing the inner workings of people, she can sure put them back together.

And only then did the cheering break out. Everybody shouted some variation of “Yay!!”

[SALARYMAN STATUS SCREEN]

[The Orphanage] Reputation gain! +25

[East Gate Commons] Reputation gain! +20

New Status! The Project Co-Lead

DESCRIPTION: You and Mother Martha are inseparable from the future of Posteria's Home for Wayward Children.

Even Mother Martha felt in a good mood, although she looked more relieved than anything.

“Aww, look at you!” Piper's voice came from behind me all of a sudden, teasing. “Under pressure from multiple assailants and you still managed to dodge their attacks. Nice composure on the finishing blow too.”

For an average Japanese man who’d never seen a day of combat or fighting in his life, I was shocked I was not dead yet. Still, though… “If only I’d predicted the obvious second attacker after the first,” I muttered. “Real tactician, I am.”

“Don’t beat yourself up.” She nudged me. “Even if you barely hit me during training, it still counts. And some against me is worth, like, three normal people!”

I looked away, blushing. “Shut up, Piper.” I was so not being shown up by a teenager!

She grinned all the same.

Just as I turned to help clean up, I saw something on the ground glitter.

“What’s that…?” Even that caught Piper’s eye.

As I knelt down to pick it up, I noticed an insignia that was quite opulent—a coat of arms perhaps?

That didn’t make any sense, though. They could’ve been simply well-groomed street thugs.

“Cotter, what is it?” Mother Martha designed to join the fray as well. When she squinted her eyes, she must have noticed something… off. “Cotter, please let me have a closer look.”

When I gave to her, I wasn’t really a fan of how many times her expressions have shifted. My hopes for an expression of neutrality were dashed.`

“It appears Laura’s theory may have some credence.”

What do you mean credence?! What theory?!

Then I remembered what she said; about the royals, their royal guard… and about their potential conspiracy against the orphanage’s beastkin.

It wasn’t just an unknown conspirer after all.

The Crown were, indeed, using the orphanage as a convenient scapegoat for all their problems. The sole reason they can point to to demonstrate why they haven’t been doing a good job in East Gate at all.

At that moment, I felt like I wanted to curl up into a ball and die.

There were no simple solutions in East Gate.