Chapter 50

Aki threw her arms around me.

“I believe in you!”

I tried to smile. I didn’t think she had even understood that I wasn’t Goddess, but now was not the moment to break the truth.

She let go of me and smiled.

“That’s why we follow you, like those in the past did”

I ruffled her hair. I appreciated her trying, but it didn’t matter. If I didn’t believe it myself, it would all fail. I sighed. Why hadn’t I understood this when I said yes to being their Goddess? I’d thought I would simply need to show myself, not start to believe I was her and lead them into war.

I glanced at the others, who had begun chatting among themselves. But what other choice did I have? Somehow, despite everything, even I could see that I made a difference in this world. But to what price…?

“Shall we go?”

Aki grinned. She was so excited about going to the South, and it made me smile. It was very different from how she had been before we arrived in her land. She was right, though. Keep moving was better than thinking about this.

I got up and turned to Chaya.

“How do you feel?”

She didn’t meet my gaze and only stared at the ground as she whispered,

“I am fine… I can walk now. I am sorry for slowing you down…”

Aki shuffled over to her and took her hand.

“Don’t worry. You can walk with me, and it will be fine.”

Chaya hesitantly smiled as Aki pulled her up and dragged her along the path.

The others got up, and we followed her. I was happy they had found each other. Aki was so gentle, and I think she enjoyed having someone to care for.

Karim came up to me.

“I believe in you, too, Rina”, he said firmly.

I sighed and shook my head.

“You know I am not her, Karim…”

“It is the path that you walk that defines you, not the reason you chose to walk it”

I shrugged.

“I guess I’ve just been lucky”

He shook his head.

“No. You made the right choices, and they led us here.”

“Yeah...”

He left, walking over to talk to Selene, and I sighed. At least he behaved as he always did. I glanced at Selene… In all the turmoil, I had almost forgotten about what had happened between us. She hadn’t acted strange since we came back from Doria, but I guess she must have temporarily forgotten about it too…

We spent the rest of the day walking, and as the evening fell, found a place to set camp. Tomorrow, we would reach Shu, the last village in Aki’s land before crossing the river to Fa’a and Uruk’s home country. Being out again reminded me of when I came here. Crossing the desert…. It felt like a distant memory now.

I sighed. I had never thought I would end up like this when the Cat told me I could make a difference. She could at least have warned me… Although she hadn’t lied. I did have a chance to make a difference. I glanced at my friends preparing food. They believed in me… I sighed. If I messed this up and didn’t believe that I was Goddess, I would let them all down.

Aki gestured to me to come and eat, and I got up and joined them. She was chatting happily with Chaya, and even the girl seemed to slowly relax. She laughed as Aki made an imitation of someone, and I smiled. I guess she missed having friends her age.

Once we’d finished, Chaya took her flute and started to play. We sat in silence as the soft melody rang through the air. I closed my eyes, listening to those strangely sounding songs.

How could I believe I was someone that I was not? And even if I did manage, did I have the right to make everyone believe in a lie? But it would protect them and give them hope… I had to… My friends believed in me…

The music faded, and I opened my eyes. I had to… I reached out to Chaya and Uruk, sitting on either side of me, and took their hands. The others joined hands, and I took a deep breath and began,

I dispel the darkness

and bring the light.

I don’t regret

walking this path.