Chapter Fifty Six: Weakest Monster

It’s oval shaped. It’s blue. It’s all made up of fluid. And it is really big.
BOING BOING
The big fluid creature bounced its way toward me very slowly.
Now I get it. It’s that — you know, that……….. thing that comes out in games? The one said to be the weakest of all monsters? Well, that’s it right there.
It’s a slime.
But unlike any slime story I’ve heard since coming to this world, this one is without a doubt the biggest you could ever imagine.
Slimes are supposed to be about the size of a football or a little bigger than that. This one is bigger than my whole body. It’s big enough to swallow me whole. This is definitely not a normal slime.
And what’s with the scenery in here? Isn’t this supposed to be a dungeon? Why is there a yellow sky and green grass? Shouldn’t it be something like a cave or at least a multi-storeyed structure since it’s made up of floors? This doesn’t make sense.
“BOING BOING”
Anyway, I should take care of this slime first. It gets on my nerves for some reason. I don’t get why I should be wasting time fighting such weak monsters when I’ve already defeated the winged freezer. If this were a game, then this dungeon has a crappy setting.
I should be sent to the highest level or something like the 50th level. I do deserve it, right?
Well, whatever. Let’s take care of this slime first. Even though it doesn’t have eyes, I could clearly feel it glaring at me. It seemed to be looking down on me. I should just finish it off and look for the stairs. There are stairs, right? Because I don’t see any.
Or is the dungeon programmed to reveal the stairs once I’ve dealt with enough monsters on a certain level? There is no point thinking about that now.
“Boing Boing” — the slime stood right next to me. I paid no attention and continued my thoughts.
I’ve fought in the nightmare forest and survived; a single slime wouldn’t…………….??
“Haam!” Completely ignoring the creature, a hole opened up in the upper part of its body where the eyes should be. Staring to see what it was up to, I felt a sudden heat spread all over my body.
“Bleh!” I couldn’t breathe. Bubbles escaped out of my mouth like I had been swallowed by the ocean.
“.……!!??” I couldn’t make sense of what was going on.
I felt so heavy, wet, and hot at the same time.
That was when I realized what was happening. I’d been swallowed by the slime after that hole opened up. And because of that, I was now inside its body.
The strange thing was that I could clearly feel myself floating in its fluid. I tried opening my eyes but felt an intense pain as the fluid made contact with them. The hot feeling remained after I shut them. It felt as though my body was melting.
Haha! If I’m only inside a slime then there shouldn’t be any problem getting out. Look, my hands don’t feel hot anymore. All I have to do is move……….?
Huh!!?? I don’t feel my hands anymore!!
I tried moving other parts of my body but couldn’t. I didn’t even feel them attached to me. All I felt was my head, and the numbness steadily grew stronger.
Hey, wait! What’s going on!!??
All that remained after that was darkness.
In that darkness, I saw the girl in black {HUHU} — she gently laughed at me.
Seeing her, I somehow knew I was dead. I always saw her when something terrible had happened before, and now that I could see her, it definitely meant I was dead this time around too.
But how? Did something happen while I was in the slime’s body? Did the dungeon collapse or did a really powerful monster appear?
I can’t make sense of anything anymore!!
Like the morning sun seeping through a dark room, brightness slowly returned to my eyes.
“Aah~” it somehow felt good.
Above me was the yellow sky that had no sun. It seemed like I was lying down in the green fields from earlier.
I figured I wasn’t dead. There’s no way a slime can kill me……… right?
I tried moving, but initially my head was all I could feel. “Haa?” When I applied enough force to move my head, it tilted and I found myself looking at the grass.
This way, I thought I’d be able to see the rest of my body. Or so I thought. Nothing was there. No matter how wide I opened my eyes, I couldn’t see a single limb. It felt as though all I had was a head.
“Nooooooo!!!!” It became evident to me after some time had passed. I started feeling my neck shortly after that. Then my shoulders started forming, and as time passed I was able to sit up and watch my lower half being formed.
It was something out of a horror movie. First my bones appeared, then the muscles, and then flesh covered the bones until the skin was complete.
What happened to me? Was I digested by that slime?
It was the only obvious conclusion, for I was completely naked. Right in front of me, my black gear and sword were resting on the grass.
It makes sense that the slime wouldn’t be able to digest a demon lord’s cloak and a high-level sword but……………. “I’m also a high-level fighter, right!!?? I defeated the freezer for God’s sake!!!”
It was embarrassing to be naked in the bright fields. I rushed and dressed myself, then took my sword. My body was just like always after I died: smooth and clean.
But that was a painful experience. I almost threw up watching as my body was brought back to life. Is that how it always happens, or is it because nothing remained of me this time around?
To think a lowly slime would do this to me!! “I’ll destroy all the slimes in this world!!”
But no matter how hard I tried after meeting them, I couldn’t do a thing. I was powerless. Not like how powerless I was when I fought the freezer. This time around my attacks were useless as opposed to when I attacked the freezer.
I realized a very important thing after I fought the slimes. They are incredibly resistant to physical attacks. At first I thought my screams would be of some use because they are magic, but that didn’t seem to be the case.
I used the eagle scream to defeat the weak skeletons before, but this time even the freezer scream didn’t keep the slimes down. The screams made them explode all over the place, but the fluids stuck together in no time. It’s somehow perfectly understandable that the attacks I thought were magic wouldn’t work on the slimes. It may be that my magicless body has diluted the magic property of the attacks, or maybe someone else is at fault.
Yeah, that’s it. Just like how I can’t use my abilities on humans, perhaps this time around there is a force at work.
“Gulp.” I got swallowed by a slime again.
As the one-sided fight intensified, the slimes became arrogant and appeared in groups. They took turns swallowing me and spitting me out like a sweet. About ten of them appeared at once and made things incredibly hard for me. I would get swallowed while I was too busy fighting the one in front of me.
“Aaah………….” How many times was I revived today? I can’t remember at all. All I know is that I had to retrieve my clothes several times after I returned to the land of the living.
Why are slimes so powerful? It’s terrifying.
This time, I got up from the ground, dashed to my clothes, and ran back the way I came. The black veil was there behind me the whole time.
“Hah! Hah!” I escaped from the dungeon.
A lot of adventurers were on the staircase this time. It was really dark outside as if it were midnight.
If there were a lot of people going in, then how come I hadn’t met a single one of them inside the dungeon? But somehow I’m glad I didn’t meet them. They would have seen how miserably I lost to the slimes — not to mention seeing me naked as well.
I puffed up my chest like a winner and went down the stairs. I then turned west and headed home on foot. It was a lot farther away than I thought. It took me two hours to get there. I always thought it was close because Duddul was fast.
Some people stared at me as I came out of the dungeon. There weren’t any loots in my hands, but I walked proudly. I had to do that to hide the embarrassment I’d received from those slimes.
When I finally got home, Meila was in the living room waiting for me with a smirk on her face.
“So…… how did it go? You were defeated, right?” she was confident I’d failed.
“What!? How did you know that!?” I asked, shocked.
“Come on, it’s so obvious. I made you some food to cheer you up, so eat up. Duddul’s mad at you for earlier, so he’s still sulking in your room.”
“NO — answer my question! How did you know I was going to fail!?” I wanted to know so badly.
“Sigh…. I didn’t think you were this stupid. But guess it can’t be helped………..”
I gulped, waiting to hear the truth about my defeat.
“First of all, you can’t use magic, right? So there is no way you can defeat the weakest monster.”
“Please don’t put it like that. It kinda hurts.”
“Huhu. I always knew you were a weakling. That’s why you threw me off Duddul in the nightmare forest so that you could run away. Someone found me and you claimed the feat of saving me, right? I’m sure someone else defeated the freezer for you………” She just wouldn’t shut up.
I moved close to her and knocked my fist on her head.
“Aww! What was that for? I was only playing with you!! So much for trying to chat.”
“Don’t call that chatting! It’s so embarrassing for me! And what do you mean by ‘kicked you off Duddul?’ You would have really died if it weren’t for me!”
“I get it! I get it! Just let it go!” she finally backed down.
What’s with this girl?
“Okay so here is why you can’t win against the slime. Generally the slime is known as the weakest monster, and no matter how big it is, it can’t defeat anyone. They only slow down some people and, to tell the truth, I’ve never heard of anyone getting killed by a slime. I don’t even know if they can do that. And since they can only be killed using magic, I figured that you’d have a hard time fighting them considering you don’t have any magic at all. But since you are at least a little strong, I figured they would do that much damage to you.”
Her words pierced my heart.
They did kill me, for your information!! But I can never tell her that. She would laugh at me whenever she remembered it.
“Well, it’s not like I had a hard time fighting them. I just left because I had things to do……..”
She nodded at me mockingly without looking my way. She didn’t even want to hear me out.
Damn, this girl is something else.
“Are you going to eat the food I left for you or what? Be grateful I wasted my time to cook for someone like you.” She arrogantly pointed at me.
“You were just so hungry that you cooked, right? There is nothing to be embarrassed about since there are no restaurants near here.”
“Hmph!” she ignored my comment.
Anyway, what am I looking at?
The food she wrapped and kept on the table was all black like charcoal. Everything was completely burnt.
I had no choice but to ask, “Pardon me for asking, but is this the food you are talking about?” I even asked politely so that I wouldn’t make her mad.
She crossed her arms and glared at me. “So what if it is? Just eat and go to sleep.”
“Oh, I see what is going on. You stayed in the living room even though it was time for you to sleep, waiting for me to return. At first, I would think that you were worried about me, but in truth you are just………….. hungry?”
She gasped at what I said. “Hwa!? No I’m not!!”
“Okay then I’m going to sleep. See you tomorrow.”
I faced the corridor when she held tightly onto my waist. “Please don’t go! I’m sorry for acting rude. I was just so embarrassed because I burnt everything. I even stayed up late waiting for you to cook when you returned.”
This girl…….. “Hahaha!! You know what? I don’t dislike living in the same house with you. You can be too honest sometimes. Just sit tight and wait, I’ll cook something really quick.”
I put all that behind me when I saw the expression on her face. “Sniff sniff…..” she sniffed my clothes. “You smell awful.”
“What!?” and I was just about to forget her arrogant attitude from earlier.
“Why you!!” I chased her around the room for a while. I caught her and hugged her tightly so that she could smell the unpleasant scent she disliked.
“I’m sorry! You just smell like a slime, that’s all!!”
Apparently, the smell is like rotten yogurt. It has a bitter tang.
I couldn’t tell her how I got that smell because then she’d know I’d been swallowed. I forgot about all that and went to the kitchen. To think she couldn’t even boil an egg. Just what was it that she cooked anyway?
Minutes later, I made a quick meal while she stayed close to me in the kitchen, watching as I cooked. Her stomach growled many times over.
Duddul was already asleep when I returned to my room. Either that or he pretended to be asleep because he was angry at me.
I made him take me to the dungeon the next morning so that he’d get over his anger. I didn’t know when I would return, so I told him to go home alone. No one would dare to attempt to steal a red dragon. They’d be calling for it in more than one way.
My day ended up miserably just like the other day. I wasn’t able to defeat a single slime the whole time I spent in the dungeon.
This time I got out when it was just dusk. Duddul was waiting for me when I came down the stairs.
“Rnn!” he called out.
Did he come back to pick me up? That’s so obedient of him.
“Man I want some fun! Let’s go to the higher levels tomorrow!” “No we can’t. We need to get ready first.” “Yes, he’s right.”
A party of adventurers — four in total — walked past me. They also came out of the dungeon. They looked a little older, or just about my age. There were two boys and two girls among them.
Must be nice having a party like that……….. I want one too. Maybe then I’ll be able to pass the first floor.
I returned home for the day with nothing to show for it. Meila was not in the living room. She was in the bathroom taking a bath. I had made sure to cook enough food before leaving so she wouldn’t burn all our ingredients.
I was so tired mentally that I fell asleep immediately after dinner.
It’s even more miserable than when I fought the freezer. I’m completely powerless against slimes.
“Hey. Are you in any party? Do you want to join ours?” I was asked to join a party on my third visit to the dungeon.
“Yes!!” I accepted on the spot