Chapter 18: Magic

I spent the remainder of the loop talking over my plan with Sally and reminiscing about the past. It was a truly peaceful afternoon that I wished would never end, but alas, the prince and Atlas had to show up and ruin it. He, of course, had questions about why all my furniture was destroyed, and I decided to answer those questions by running at him with a spiked mace in my hand. I didn’t make it very far, and I’m still not exactly sure which of them killed me, but either way, I got to enjoy the sight of a very terrified prince before I died.

“Good morning, Milady! Are you excited for the party tonight?”

I wanted to cry when I saw Sally’s expressionless face at the start of the next loop. It was the one I’d seen every day for the last eighteen years, but now it felt like that of a stranger. Everything we’d been through the previous day had been erased, and now she was back to normal. I teased her a bit to get a reaction, and while it made me smile, for the first time in the loop, I felt a genuine sense of loneliness.

Now I was more determined than ever to escape. However, that was easier said than done. I had a plan, yes, but it required me to master healing magic, and as I mentioned earlier, I suck at magic.

What? You think I’m some kind of fake otaku because I didn’t master every type of magic the second I was reborn? Well, believe me. Nobody is more upset about that than I am. I literally cried when I realized there was magic in this world that I could learn and master. I begged my family to let me learn it, and they responded by plopping down textbooks in front of me, each of which weighed almost as much as I did.

Yeah, it was then that I realized this world didn’t have stats and skill levels. Instead, it was more like getting a license to drive a forklift. Basically, you need a complete and absolute understanding of the physics, biology, chemistry, and mathematics behind how a spell functions before you can actually cast it.

Now you might think that I have an advantage here. We’ve all seen anime where the protagonist’s high school education somehow makes them a god in a world full of primitives. Well, first off, that’s wildly offensive to pre-modern civilizations, who weren’t nearly as dumb as some people think (even though I’ve thought that many times over since arriving here), and secondly, physics in this world is really freaking weird.

For starters, there’s no oxygen here. People looked at me like I had two heads when I first used that word, before explaining that in this world, the air is composed entirely of aether. Now, I originally laughed this off, thinking that aether was just how they described the elements that make up the air, but nope. Aether is its own thing and serves as the fuel for casting spells. In fact, there’s actually a law stating that magic beyond beginner class can’t be practiced in a room without open windows because mages regularly suffocate after using up all the aether in the room. Oh, and here’s the best part. Nobody actually knows where aether comes from. I originally thought plants, since it functions kind of like oxygen, but nope. Plants also use aether to grow.

It’s all very confusing, and somehow my past world knowledge actually made it harder to learn rather than easier. As a result, my attempts to master magic never made it very far. After six years at the academy, I could only cast beginner-class fire, water, earth, wind, light, and dark magic, and basic-class temporal, spatial, and void magic. This wasn’t particularly great, and a duke’s daughter should have reached intermediate class in at least one of the elements, but I had done well enough to pass. In fact, my teachers were a bit impressed that I had actually managed to learn a spell from every element, as people often really struggled with temporal, spatial, and void.

Also, just to clarify. Everyone started with learning basic-class magic, which covered very simple spells. The basic fire spell was called Spark, and it does as the name implies. It creates a miniature spark that lasts only an instant and is typically used to light candles. While these spells are pretty simple and most commoners even learn a few of them, learning a single one of these normally takes at least a month or two. Then there’s beginner class magic, with the beginner-class fire spell being called Flame. Unlike Spark, it produces a sustained flame that can last for several minutes. Commoners often learn one or two beginner class spells in their lifetimes, though even for nobles, this process can take a year.

Meanwhile, intermediate class magic is considered the limit for most people. These spells take years to learn and are often the most needed, even for specialized jobs. The intermediate fire spell, Fireball, delivers enough damage to take out, or at least seriously injure, most common types of monsters or demolish a small building, so few people bother going past this point. However, past intermediate are advanced and master level spells. Advanced spells usually take at least a decade to learn, and doing so results in the kingdom keeping a close eye on you, while master class magic is almost mythical. The kingdom has a handful of magicians capable of casting these spells at their disposal, but not a single one of them is less than sixty years old. These spells require a lifetime of hard work and study to learn, and according to rumors, sometimes result in the person’s death if the kingdom doesn’t trust them with that level of power.

However, things were quite a bit different when it came to healing magic. I could already cast advanced healing spells, and it’s not because I was a diligent student. I was just born knowing how to cast it, and I wasn’t alone. While everyone could theoretically learn every magical element with enough work, only about 1% of the population could use healing magic. According to the church, this was because Eros had specifically chosen these individuals to wield her magic and protect the world from the horrors of war brought about by her brother’s elemental magic. Furthermore, not only did the goddess decide who could wield healing magic, but she also decided how much healing magic to start them off with. Most people are only born with basic or beginner-class healing magic, so they have the instinctive knowledge needed to heal small cuts or scrapes, but I was born with the ability to cure even life-threatening wounds.

For the record, that’s why I was initially selected to be the church’s saint. They’d much rather take in someone born with advanced-class healing magic than someone born with basic-class healing magic who worked their way up because they considered the former to be more loved by the goddess. Essentially, the church values natural talent over hard work.

Also, if you’re wondering, Holly also has advanced-class healing magic. That’s the entire reason why she started attending the academy in what should have been her sixth and final year. She was the illegitimate child of a count and a maid whose mother was fired when her pregnancy was discovered and then died a few years later. After that, Holly was raised in an orphanage run by the church, where she was celebrated as a healer, beloved by the goddess. However, when word reached her father, he decided she could be useful and brought her home.

Now, was this a tragic backstory? Absolutely. Did I feel bad for Holly? Sure. Even after all I’d been through, I still felt bad for her, but that didn’t mean I was gonna roll over and let her take everything from me. I was gonna fight back and I was gonna win, no matter how long it took.

Oh, and if you’re wondering how I know her entire backstory. The prince told me. Holly’s healing magic was considered valuable enough that Roman asked the prince to look after her once he was given a rundown of her circumstances. Of course, the version he heard was the count’s retelling, which somehow made him the victim in all this, but it was so heavy-handed that even the prince wasn’t dumb enough to believe it. Holly later filled him in on the truth, and he shared it with me on one of our dates. Apparently, the count threatened to demolish the orphanage she grew up in if she didn’t comply with his every demand, but that threat didn’t mean very much when she had a prince backing her.

I laughed when the prince told me that and let him know that I was proud of him for keeping Holly and her orphanage safe. However, the look he gave in turn was strained, almost guilty. At the time, I thought I’d said something wrong, and though I didn’t know what, I spent the next several days obsessing about my screw up. I wanted to apologize to the prince during our next date, but there wasn’t one. While I blamed myself for a time, I ultimately decided he was just busy with his royal duties and decided not to bother him, though what if I had? Would it have changed anything, or would my end have just come even sooner? Was there a world where the relationship could’ve ended happily?

I wasn’t sure, but in the end, it didn’t matter. The prince had made his choices, and I had made mine. Sure, Roman, Holly, and even the gods had gotten in the way, but they only broke a relationship that neither of us had ever put the work into keeping alive. I wouldn’t get anywhere if I just kept blaming them. I needed to escape, and the only way to do that was to leave Holly in my dust. She could have the prince. I didn’t want him anyway, but in order to live, I’d have to take back my title from her.