Trust issues

The weather was sunny again and nothing indicated a powerful, long lived blizzard raging over the icy plains not too long ago. We had passed the large volcanic plateau that had nearly been our demise and drove again through endless flat terrain.

Now that we all four were pedaling together again our daily schedule had to change accordingly. Not being able to utilize the constantly blowing wind like with the ‘Ice Wallow’ meant we had to take breaks and sleep at the same time. Fortunately that wasn’t a problem because our sleeping cycles had already synchronized during our forced long stay in the last hideout.

We developed a routine that consisted of driving for five candles after breakfast, stopping for lunch at noon for about one candle and driving five to six more candles 'till the evening. Sometimes we drove longer in the morning, sometimes longer in the afternoon. Reeza erected a temporary igloo-like ice dome for protection when we went to sleep (you know, ‘eternal’ daylight in the arctic summer!), and I was reminded again how essential for all our survival her and Yára’s magical abilities truly were!

They were very humble now, barely spoke and tried everything to regain above all Lily’s trust. The beastess didn't make it easy for them, having trust issues from the very beginning due to her tragic past. She rarely spoke to them, just the bare minimum. Not unfriendly, but in a factual, professional manner that hurt almost more than open hostility.

I tried to make up for it by being especially friendly, but nobody seemed to feel comfortable with that. It was as if they decidedly wanted to be treated like inferiors - for the time being at least.

On the second day I finally discussed the matter with Illyára when she insisted again on cleaning our dishes after breakfast - manually, without any magical assistance!

At first she shied away from speaking, but opened up in the end.

“I literally cannot express how sorry I am for …everything. Words aren’t enough, I have to show it!” she explained empathetically and continued: “Talking is easy, work is hard. Talking alone is never reliable on its own. We have to show through hard work and good deeds that we truly mean what we said …and earn back the trust we’ve squandered.”

“Well, you’ve never lost my trust.” I answered and put my hand on her shoulder, …which made her look at me in shock. Yes, I rarely touch anybody…

“Just because of one poor decision to treat someone just as poorly seems …unfair to me. I’ve seen from the very beginning that you admitted your decision was plain wrong. You made no excuses, no sugarcoating, no colouring it, and that showed me two things.”

I held up two fingers to make sure to get my point across.

“First: both of you have character and strong values. Weak characters or narcissists never can admit to their own wrongdoings. And second: you already learned your lesson by admitting your wrongdoing. So what's the point of further punishment?”

The ælf barely held herself together. Her lips trembled, her strange bright eyes started moistening. Oh god, please! No tears!

“HEY!”

Lily's deep, menacing voice cut through the tender atmosphere like a whip.

“How long can it take to clean a few dishes? Get on with it, we have to MOVE!”

Yára immediately shrank down, hurriedly resuming her work and I stood up, scowling, ready to give the beastess a piece of my mind.

But she cut me off before I could even begin.

“You are too soft and naive again.” she murmured in a menacing rumble next to my ear, clamping her paw on my neck.

“You can’t forgive them when they haven't forgiven even themselves! What do you hope to accomplish by that?”

I stood my ground and looked calmly into her angry, wild eyes that hovered just inches away from my face.

“How long has it been since the eruption?”

Her eyes narrowed dangerously.

“What are you getting at?”

“Well, after nine days it should be obvious that they admitted their mistake, or not?”

Her voice sank down to nothing more than a hiss.

“Don’t play games! Just say what you have to say!”

I tried my best to not become intimidated.

“Look,” I tried to reason, “they know they did wrong. They apologized, they try to atone, and it's already been nine days. Don't you think you can let it finally go?”

Her eyes flared and a corner of her maw twisted into a contemptuous snarl.

“Now listen!”

For the first time she literally hoisted me up towards her snout (terrifyingly effortless I have to add!), her voice just a bare rumble coming from deep inside her chest.

“When they’ve proven in the next dangerous situation to be reliable again, then, and just then they have atoned and redeemed themselves! Not a blin earlier! Do you understand?”

I nodded hastily, intimidated now, despite my best efforts.

“Good! Don’t be a fool and make the same mistakes I did! And now make yourself ready.”

She refrained from tossing me back, yet my knees felt oddly weak when I finally felt firm ground under my feet again. At least she wasn't a complete bully!

When we set off it was as if this conversation had never happened. Lily was tightlipped as usual, the girls in the back silent, and I was miserable. I couldn’t get my point through and my good tempered nature didn’t cope well with the tension. I wanted to help but was unable to do so. So we drove mostly silently and made at least good progress.

Yára and Reeza cloaked us again like before the catastrophe and assisted greatly in our all pedaling. We practically flew with more than fifty miles per hour through the snowy ice plains without ever drifting or getting stuck, and without even using the electric motors. Yes, magical assistance really is a lifesaver!

Despite that we didn't reach the next supply cave until the following day.

“Believe it or not, but that’s our last hideout before we reach the Askæliaen mountains, and with it the border of Skîbæria!” told Lily unexpectedly cheerfully.

“At the edge of the mountains, one on this side, the other one beyond them, we hid two more supply stocks. The last one is probably unnecessary but who knows.”

“We are close to leaving all this …ice?”

I couldn’t believe it! Finally!

“Yes, a few more days, not a whole sideh, and we’ll reach the shores of Lake Atûmna as the dwarves call it.”

She smiled and for the first time in a long while she had a look close to happiness on her face (snout, whatever).

“You’ll see, it’s one of the most beautiful lakes in all of Liyúra. And one of the biggest, nearly an ocean. A freshwater ocean like few others. In the winter it’s completely frozen, and in the summer it’s littered with sparkling icebergs breaking off from the glaciers oozing over the mountains from Skîbæria. Its northern shore is mostly bare with just a few groves, but the southern shores are touched by endless forests. Ah, the Tóràya! I can’t wait to see it!”

Sadly her mellow mood didn't last very long. Her gaze quickly lost its forlorn look and returned to the present.

“But we have some more pedaling to do before we are there!”