Gambling Before Royalty

With Rollnaldo slung over her shoulder in a potato sack, Eight stepped over the charred rubble that she had caused, as she led the way into a vast circular atrium that was completely covered in white marble and was Roman themed. In the center was a towering twenty foot tall statue of a muscular shirtless man wearing a crown. Surrounding it was a velvet rope and at its feet was a plaque that read, ‘do not touch’.

Eight looked at me with a smirk. “We should tip over that statue of the Kasino King.”

“Haven't you caused enough property dam-.”

Before I could finish, she slapped Jacky on the butt. “Jacky likes apples.” He neighed as he bucked his hind legs, smacking them into the statue, causing it to crash to the ground and shatter into a pile of dust and marble fragments.

The sound of metallic feet could be heard stomping down a side corridor. A moment later, a dozen white Slotomatons entered the room and surrounded the three of us with swords in hand.

Eight gave them a wave. “Muck off, you pieces of scrap metal. The Kasino Kingdom’s most infamous domestic terrorist is here to see the Kasino King.”

“There's no way they’re going to stand down just because you-.” I spoke too soon…

The group of slotomatons let out a series of clicks as they lowered their weapons and made way for us.

My mouth hung open in shock. “What the-?... I can't believe that actually worked.”

Eight snickered. “They’re obviously submitting in fear of my super secret domestic terrorist organization.”

It seemed a bit far fetched, but from the way these robots were acting, I didn't have any other explanation.

Continuing onward, we crossed through the atrium and into a vast sea of slot machines and empty table games. The casino floor which we had entered into, just like the exterior of this place, had an uncanny resemblance to the Kaiser’s Palace Casino and Resort in Las Vegas.

Leading us across the eerily empty casino, Eight led us to an open area in the direct center of the Casino. On the ceiling was a circular section that was an almost divine-like painting of the sky that was so realistic, that if I didn't know any better, I would have thought it was a skylight. Below it was an illuminated throne completely made from multi-colored neon lights.

“Oh it's just you, Eight.” A man with a gritty voice, who sat upon the throne, yawned.

Eight aggressively pointed in his direction. “I’m not here to muck around, Kasino King. Let's just cut to the chase.”

“That’s the Kasino King?” I murmured to myself.

The fairly slim and pale middle aged man who lazily sat on the throne was not what I had pictured at all. He had a number of tattoos which covered every visible inch of his body. Across his forehead the words ‘Da King’ were printed in a gaudy money themed font. Under his right eye he had a king of hearts and under the left was a diamond suit. On his chin were three sevens. His arms and legs were covered by a plain black hoodie and gray sweat pants, but across each of his knuckles was inked a different side of a dice. Sitting on top of his bleached blonde hair was a crown made from neon lights that pulsed in all different colors. To be perfectly honest this guy looked more like someone who would be handing out copies of his mix tape rather than a king.

“What do you want?” The Kasino King rolled his eyes at her.

“My super secret domestic terrorist organization and I have come to overthrow you and crown myself Kasino Kween!” She boldly declared.

“Woah wait a second, what the heck are you do-!?”

She shushed me. “Shut the muck up, Recruit Number Seventeen. You're ruining my moment.” After taking a moment to reprimand me, she turned back to the Kasino King and continued. “I've come to challenge you to gamble showdown for the thro-.”

Before Eight could finish, the Kasino King spoke as fast as he could. “‘Kay nose goes on three. One, two, three, go!” Without giving her time to act, his finger was already touching his nose. He managed to beat Eight with the same cheap trick she used herself.

She stomped her foot in frustration. “Are you kidding me, dad!”

If only I had been drinking a beverage because I would have done a spit take. “You're the Kasino King's daughter!”

“Unfortunately.” She sighed.

Now it made sense why those slotomatons stood down. It seemed like Rollnaldo's hunch about her being a rich chick with daddy issues had been spot on.

“You know, your terrorist organization isn't much of a secret when you just come out and tell people.” He pointed over to me. “So is this your boyfriend or something?”

“Ew, I wouldn't touch this mucker with a stick covered in dog crap.” She had a look of disgust on her face.

“I'm glad you think so highly of me.” I sarcastically muttered under my breath.

“I'll have you know I actually did just get married though.” In front of her father, she opened up her potato sack and dumped it out in front of him.

Falling out of it and landing flat on his head was Rollnaldo with an angry look on his face. “You pipping psycho!”

“Dad, this is my husband, Recruit Number One.” Eight introduced him.

Rollnaldo flipped back up to his feet and held his finger out. “Listen here pip-...” Just as he was about to confront Eight's father, he came to a realization. “...Y-your the Kasino King.” Suddenly he changed his tune. “I just want to let you know that you raised a wonderful daughter, sir.”

The Kasino King let out a snort. “No need to be a kiss ass, dice man. I'm quite aware that my daughter is a complete nut. Let me guess she forced you into a shotgun wedding.”

Rollnaldo grinned. “I think we're going to get along. Wait a second…” Suddenly his eyes became wide as he came to a realization. “My father-in-law is the Kasino King!”

“So I've met your husband, but what’s with the kid in the hoodie and that weird looking animal.” The Kasino King turned his attention back to Jacky and I.

Eight casually waved her hand around. “Oh that's just Recruit Number Seventeen. He’s pretty much just my henchman. The horse is kind of a long story, but he belongs to my husband.”

Despite her trying to brush me off as just a lackey, I approached the Kasino King and kneeled before him. “Your majesty, it is an honor to meet you. I actually journeyed across the Kasino Kingdom to seek your help and wisdom.”

He smirked at me. “Looks like we got another kiss ass.”

Feeling embarrassed I stood back up. “I actually am serious about needing your assistance.” I took a deep breath then continued. “This might sound crazy, but I was transported here from another world and I heard that you might be able to help me get back home.”

“Oh, you're the one I had transported here. Looks like I just won that bet.” A stream of poker chips rained down onto the Kasino King from the ceiling.

I stood before him confused. “Wait, what?”

He casually shrugged. “I bet my entire fortune that the unluckiest person in the entire universe could beat all odds and make it all the way to my palace… and here you are.”

“I don't understand. You just brought me here because of a bet.”

“Yeah pretty much… You see, as the Kasino King, I have never lost a bet even once and to be perfectly frank, I'm bored of winning.” He let out a yawn. “Honestly I thought I could finally manage to lose by betting on the unluckiest person in the universe… and yet my luck was still too strong. I even thought if I gave a little bit of my power, it would counteract my own.”

“Are you kidding me!?” I shouted in frustration. “You're telling me I only made it here because of your luck and not my own.”

“You're the unluckiest person in the universe by a long shot, the next unluckiest person doesn't even come close. So yeah, my own luck is so powerful it completely overruled your misfortune.” He continued.

The feeling of defeat overtook me, as I had finally thought that I overcame my bad luck on my own over these last few weeks and was finally starting to live up to my name. In the end, it was all just someone else's luck.

“...” I stood in silence.

The Kasino King tossed a handful of chips at my feet. “I don't know why you're getting so down, I’ll give you a cut of my winnings if you want.”

“Honestly, I just want to go home.” I hung my head in defeat.

“Hey, let's not be too hasty, Lucky… that's a lot of money.” Rollnaldo chimed in.

“I don't care, I just want out of this place.”

The Kasino King shook his head. “Unfortunately for you, I can only grant requests to those who can defeat me in a gamble showdown… which I've never lost.”

“If I were to challenge you, would you just play a cheap trick on me like you did with Eight?” I wondered.

“Just for all the trouble you've gone through, I'll humor you and give you a real gamble showdown.” He responded.

“Fine then.” I pointed at him adamantly. “I challenge you to a gamble showdown!...”