The Warrior’s Suppression

All of Ruchs was in a frenzy, except for one girl in chains who couldn’t stop staring at the front gates.

“...Agon…?” Dinorah tucked his name under her breath. She couldn’t find the strength to use her full voice after what she witnessed. It was a short amount of time, but the moment she shared with him meant more to her than words could convey. Dinorah was loved amongst her people, but that love always felt scripted to her, oftentimes even by her own father. Not to say that Dinorah didn’t appreciate it, but it always left her unfulfilled. When they showed her love, she wanted that love to extend to every part of her character. Not just the parts that were socially accepted. You could dream of anything as long as the other person could dream it with you. But what happens when your dream expands beyond what they view? Would they still be willing to dream by your side? She could never venture far enough to receive a proper answer, for her dream was always taken at the standard level. Becoming one of the greatest warriors was respectable, admirable, and inspirational. It was the means to the end of that dream that could never be seen by others. In Ruchs, day by day, it was simple, perfectly arranged “love” and equalized dreams. But in that one night in the Ulrich Woods, her dream expanded. She found something that to her was more precious than any love she could’ve ever received, from her father or the Ruchians. Understanding. It was one thing to make a new friend, but it was another thing to be understood by them. To her, Agon had every reason to leave those woods the moment he saw her, but he stayed. And not only did he stay, he listened to her. Her dream, her goals, he absorbed everything and stayed by her side. She wasn’t dismissed, she was acknowledged; acknowledged in the one part of her life where it was most critical. He allowed her to unapologetically dream, even if he didn’t necessarily dream with her. If only she could be lost in that dream again; instead, she found herself in a horrendous nightmare. Even the “love” was gone. Every Ruchian turned on her with the snap of a finger, but the greatest betrayal was her own father, and her biggest inspiration.

“It appears that our hero, Agon, had more important matters to attend to.” Louger sneered as she walked up to Dinorah’s side. The girl slowly took her eyes off the distant gates and fixed them on the proud warrior.

“It's a shame that he couldn’t stay back to spectate, but a great warrior such as himself must like to keep busy. I can understand that; I admire that sort of initiative.” Dinorah felt her throat tighten as she tried to digest Louger’s words of praise for Agon.

“...Great…warrior…” Louger then cupped Dinorah’s chin softly in her hand and raised it so that her entire view was of nothing else but the Ruchian hero.

“Ah, were you hoping to be called a ‘great warrior’ after that stunt you pulled? Have your name etched in history? Your adventures sung throughout the taverns and guild halls of Velicima? Dinorah, Dinorah…” Her grip tightened around her chin and cheeks. She struggled under the weight of the chains. “Why would we call you a great warrior…when you tried to help one of the greatest threats to all Ruchians?!?” Louger’s voice drilled into Dinorah’s ears, but no matter how much it hurt, she couldn’t look away. Louger was her idol, the blueprint to her dream, everything she wanted to be and more, but to see and hear the great hero of Ruchs condemn her so easily made Dinorah feel sick.

“Louger…why are you talking to me like this…? Why are you treating me like this…? You’re a hero of nobility…humility…so why…”

“Dinorah…do you remember when we were children…?” She snaps out of her thoughts to ponder Louger’s question.

“Wha…”

She immediately took her hand from Dinorah’s chin and ran it across her left cheek in a loud slap. Several of the Ruchians cheered from within the crowd. Enson held his head to the ground and prayed. Louger’s voice then dropped to a disturbingly low tremor.

“Come on…you remember that day. I don’t care how many delusions of grandeur you have trapped in that skull of yours. Think really hard, Dinorah; back to when Ruchs was nothing but a meager village.”

The stinging impact made a memory play back in Dinorah’s mind. A worn wooden sign that read “WELCOME TO RUCHS” could be seen hanging on the wall of the front entrance of a fenced area of land. There were small wooden houses that stood across from one another in two parallel rows, each holding a stake or two with a lantern attached at the top. At the very end of the fenced area was a house that stood much taller than the others, with a sign titled “MAYOR FREJA”. A girl ran out of the front door of the mayor’s house with bright orange eyes that crackled like the embers of the lanterns, laughing and wailing in the afternoon air. She cheered and danced along the front porch of the house with vigor.

“Louger! Don’t go running off just yet! Just because you’re ten years old now doesn’t make you an adult!” A woman shouted from inside the house.

“But it’s my birthday, Mom!” she whined. “You said when I turn double digits, I could go explore the woods!”

“I know what I said, just be careful! And take your little brother with you!”

“But whyyyy?!?”

“Because I said so, miss ma’am! Go on, Ulrich. Follow your sister.” At those words, a small body peeked from behind the threshold of the front door. A pair of orange, fiery eyes met with Louger’s own. The small boy walked further out to the front porch with the door closing behind him. He grasped and played with the hem of his shirt while he stood several inches away from his sister.

“Is it really okay if I come along, La-La?” the boy muttered.

“Ulrich! Don’t call me that!” She demanded.

The timid sibling, Ulrich, shifted his eyes to his shirt out of nervous habit. “Sorry, La…Louger.”

“Arrrrgh…! Look, Ulrich. I’m an…!” She stopped and dragged the boy away from the door. “I’m an adult. And adults get to go on adventures, not five-year-olds! You’re gonna get hurt! And I don’t wanna spend my first adventure trying to take care of you!"

“I…but mom said…”

“I KNOW what mom said! But I SAY it's not safe. You’d be better off just staying here, okay?”

“...Okay.” Ulrich reluctantly agreed. At this, Louger jumped down from the porch, completely skipping the steps, and ran off towards the front entrance of town. The little boy watched as she zipped past the other villagers and houses until she completely disappeared from his sight. He hung his head and turned, raising a hand to knock on the door. But just before his knuckles could make contact, another voice called out.

“Pssst! Down here!” Ulrich followed the voice under the porch and saw a girl at the bottom of the stairs with tiny bantu knots in her head that looked like pebbles. Her eyes were a bright green that seemed to light up her entire face.

“You’re Louger’s little brother? Really?”

“Y-yes…? Who are you…?”

“I’m Dinorah!”

“O-okay…?”

“Do you want to go on an adventure?” She grinned. Ulrich’s eyes lit up.

“Wha…Really…?”

“I heard what Louger said. You’re five, so you can’t go with her. But I'm five too! So, together that makes ten! I say we sneak out and show your big sister that we can go adventuring with her! ”

“I don’t know…”

“Come on, Eric! It’ll be fun!” She held out her hand to the boy and giggled. He had no idea who this girl was, but the possibility of going on an adventure enticed him. He reached out his hand to grab hers.

“I-It’s Ulrich…”

The memory of the sheepish boy faded back into the corners of her mind; Dinorah was once again met with Louger’s seething visage.

“Yes. You saw him, didn’t you…? Just now…you saw my brother….”

“Louger…I-”

“No, no…let me finish that statement for you. My brother and an idiotic girl went out on an ‘adventure’. He tried to follow me into the woods and got lost. Then he heard a noise and blindly followed it. And what did he find?

“He just wanted to spend time with you…”

An Elbrus. He found an Elbrus, though he had no idea what he was laying his eyes upon. I heard my brother crying out my name. I chased his voice down, twisted my ankles as I rushed to his aid. Eventually, I did find him; you would think I would be relieved. But then I saw…my little brother bleeding out while being carried away into the deep thicket by some creature…I was petrified. I couldn’t do anything except watch as that thing grabbed my baby brother by his shirt and set him on its back. The sound that emanated from its core in the sunlight sent chills down my spine. And the part that irks me the most…? That foul creature had the gall to turn around with those beady eyes and give me one last glance as it galloped deeper into the woods. Those eyes haunted my nights; I had no will to dream.

“Louger…”

“I touched the ground where he bled. What else could I have done? His spilled blood was the only aspect of him that could be saved. I, on the other hand, lost a part of my soul that day. When I ran back home, I saw everyone huddled together; all around you. You were sniveling and hiccuping uncontrollably. Then…I heard you say his name…”

“Louger, PLEASE-”

“You were there. You were there the entire time.”

“I…I…”

“Oh, it must be so liberating. To let your mind wander and forget your sins as if they never happened. Was there ever any guilt within you? That day, everyone was staring at me like some wild hog wallowing in the muck of the wild. They saw the blood on my hands. The disappointment I felt while they glared at me was overwhelming. I TOLD Ulrich he wasn’t ready, yet I was still the one to blame, because I was his elder. My mother beat me senseless for his death, the death YOU caused. No one took the time to listen to my side of the story, but they saw you wailing and whining and folded right over. Why…w-why…”

Louger began to weep amongst her words, trying to keep her wrath coherent so Dinorah wouldn’t be spared a syllable. Her tears dropped on the sinner’s cheeks like spiteful rain.

“Why didn’t you tell them the truth, Dinorah..? You had all this time to take accountability. So why didn’t you tell them that you were the one at fault? Why…Why did YOU get to walk away unscathed?!?”

A pent-up sorrow welled up in Dinorah’s eyes. The truth of the matter was that she completely forgot the traumatic events that led to Ulrich’s passing. Everything that transpired on that day was unconsciously buried under new memories, one after the other. But now it was resurfacing. The way that Ulrich died, the mortified look on Louger’s face, the glimmering eyes of the Elbrus within the shadows of the woods, and even the day the Ruchians gathered in the naming of the woods in remembrance of him. She was there for every moment, but her mind sealed it all away. When she was with Agon, that sorrow she felt in the eyes of the Elbrus was not for the beast alone, but to offer a reflection of her own past. The tears ran full force down her face. She wailed just as she did when she was a child, and it filled Louger with a fresh hatred.

“No…” she growled. “You don’t get to cry, you don’t get to feel sorry now of all times. You had numerous chances to make things right, but you chose to be ignorant. After Ulrich’s death, I made a vow. I swore that I would become stronger and kill every Elbrus I ever found. You had the luxury of living life thinking there was only one, but there were hordes of them, blasted vermin…! But eventually I got my revenge. Around my sixth to seventh kill, fate observed my aching heart and the promise I inscribed upon it, and delivered the Elbrus that killed Ulrich right to me. I filleted that creature and savored every cut I made into its skin. I thought I was satisfied…”

She held her hand out in the air.

“Thalassio.”

And summoned her blade in her hand to let it meet with Dinorah’s eyelids. The sounds of waves brutally crashed against each other and flooded her eardrums.

“But then I remembered that you were still free. You never truly suffered, did you? I plotted the many ways I could make you feel what I felt, but nothing satisfied me. And with my role as Ruch’s greatest warrior, I couldn’t punish you without reason; my reputation would be soiled. I cannot take your life, but I can take your peace; I will make sure that you do not see anything ever again. Not your father’s smile, nor the dirt you will kick from your feet. Dinorah Kuria, you are one of the greatest failures Velicima has ever had to bear. Roll with the tides, you sinful wretch.”

The crowd screamed Louger's name as she took position and raised Thalassio to the sky.