Normality

Excitement engulfed Audra as the scenario began. The program swirled around her, constructing the world bit by bit. Sensations flickered on and off as synapses connected.

She would finally get to experience some closure. Sure, it wouldn't be same, but it would probably make her feel better. After all, these things were pretty lifelike.

She continued to wait as anticipation drew closer.

It felt strange, like an impossible dream. Physicality blurred together. Her heart thundered. Her fist clenched as she imagined what it would be like—to see them again.

However, when she opened her eyes, she was met with an empty void of darkness. Not the familiar sight of her shop.

She blinked, confused.

She willed herself to look around but realized she couldn't move. Her body had become like lead, even lifting her finger was too much.

Panic set in, and she tried to scream.

No sound came out though. There was only silence and the faintest buzzing noise that droned on.

Just before her thoughts could strike morbidity, something jarred her free. As suddenly as it had appeared, the darkness left, replaced by a blinding white light and the sound of a thousand noises.

***

Audra gulped in air as a new reality washed over her. Senses were on overload. Her body trembled as it struggled to process everything. It took a few seconds until she could finally register what was happening—where she was.

She was standing by a gorgeous lake.

The water shimmered in the sunlight, and the scent of trees and flowers drifted through the air. A flock of geese swam lazily across its surface, honking loudly and flapping their wings.

The heck happened? What was this place?

It was vaguely familiar to her, although not quite. It possessed the grandness of Crater Lake, the atmosphere of Sparks Lake, and a bit of Agate Lake's shape—like someone mashed them together for the most picturesque body of water she'd ever seen.

"Hello?" she called out. Her voice echoed in the stillness.

No one answered.

She was alone, surrounded only by the beauty of nature. The sun was warm, the breeze was cool, and the earth beneath her feet was firm and comforting.

This wasn't what she'd intended. She should have been in front of the shop, not the middle of nowhere.

On top of it all, something felt off about her body. She looked down to see what it might be, only for her eyes to nearly pop from her skull.

"Holy crap."

Where her bionics should've been, there was nothing but normal, healthy skin. Soft flesh had replaced carbon material and synthetic alloys, and her prosthetic leg was now a wholly natural one. When she touched the base of her neck, there was no smoothness of metal to greet her fingertips, just the lightest brush of hair.

She was… whole.

The realization hit her like a truck, nearly toppling her into the lake. She wiggled her toes and flexed her fingers. She'd never had a left arm or a right leg of her own, and now there were just there, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

All of her life she'd known nothing but bionics. They were as much a part of her as her blood or bones. There'd only been one time in her life like this—not propped up by machines. A brief few minutes when she'd first entered this world. And now, to suddenly be without them, she felt weird. Different.

But not different in a bad way.

Audra smiled and inhaled the fresh air.

She was finally normal. She could do anything, go anywhere—be herself.

She wasn't a freak!

Tears welled in her eyes as she savored the grass beneath her toes. She couldn't help it. For the first time in forever, things felt right. When she saw her reflection in the lake, that feeling swallowed her.

The girl staring back was the one that she'd always wanted to be. Long, brown hair flowed down her shoulders and back like a river. Smooth, unblemished skin covered her body; bright, vibrant amber eyes gazed back at her; no scars from past surgeries marred her form.

No mechanical limbs, no artificial organs, nothing. Just a girl, plain and ordinary.

Her hands traced her face and arms again, marveling at the softness. She could do this for hours. It was surreal, as if she was dreaming—

Wait.

The facade cracked in an instant.

All of this was a fantasy. None of this was real. Not the lake, the forest, her body.

Nothing.

Her knuckles whitened as her fists curled in on themselves. Bitter tears streamed down her face and to the lake. They broke its surface, distorting her reflection in the water.

Back when they'd used VR machines at school, their avatars were locked to be the same as their physical bodies. It was supposed to be a 'more authentic experience' and help minimize distractions.

She understood why now, more so than ever.

Why couldn't she have had this life? Why couldn't this have been the way she was born?! Why did she have to exist as some abomination of nature?!

Sure, it was selfish to think like that. There were plenty of people that'd been born with far worse problems than her. People who would never get to experience this kind of freedom, or who would be lucky to even live at all.

Yet, it still hurt.

"Damn it! Why?!"

Audra fell to her knees and slammed her fist against the ground. Earth went flying in chunks as pain shot up her arm.

Crap. She forgot could actually feel with that hand now.

She collapsed to the grass with a groan, rubbing it until the stung wore off. A few birds flew overhead.

A part of her wanted to just lie here and wallow, experiencing a reality she would never have. It would be so easy, just stay here and bask in what could have been.

Though she already knew that she couldn't. Not just because she didn't have all day, but because it would probably hurt her more the longer she stayed like this.

Eventually she gathered enough strength to sit up.

"Alright. Gotta figure out how to reset the scenario—get to the shop."

She pulled up the menu, to try and make the most of her remaining time, but while some of the options were available, the one to change the ongoing scenario was locked.

Oh. Well that's great.

There didn't seem to be any valid option other than to exit the simulation—much to her chagrin. She'd only come here to test the machine anyways. There was no point in getting caught up in something that didn't matter in the long run.

Or at least that's what she tried telling herself.

She'd wanted this experience to help her feel better. Instead, all she got was a renewal to her identity crisis.

She took a few more seconds to savor her faux normalness. One more breath. One more flex. One more brush of wind against her skin.

Then after enough moments of hesitation, she selected the 'Exit Scenario' option and pressed it.

***

When her vision returned, she was back inside the capsule. A series of loud beeps sounded around her as the machine powered down. The lid hissed, the cable detached, and a wave of cold air washed over her face.

She took a moment to catch her breath.

She shivered, rubbing her arms. Everything was back to how it always was—bonded to synthetic shackles.

Audra shook her head and pushed those thoughts aside. Best not have a pity party now.

She climbed out of the pod a bit wobbly, and as her eyes adjusted to the lights of the workshop, she noticed that Zephyr leaning against the wall and sipping tea.

"Welcome back," he said casually. "Saw you decided to give the capsule a test run. How was it?"

"Oh. Uh… Worked fine, I guess? Might be an issue with the custom scenarios, but other than that I think it's okay. Erm, sorry for just using it without—"

He cut her off before taking another sip from his mug.

"Don't be, I gave you free reign. Still, that isn't good. I'll probably have to look over the system to see what's wrong. Can't send something with issues out."

There was a moment of silence as he looked her over.

"You alright?"

She gulped, trying not to think back to the lake too much.

"Y-yes, I think so."

The answer seemed satisfactory enough despite the unreadable look on Zephyr's face.

"In that case, lunch is ready. We can talk more while we eat."

Her mind briefly wandered back to the virtual world as they exited the workshop. However, it wasn't something that she wanted to think about now, especially with Zephyr present.

She forced herself to focus on lunch instead. There would be time to dwell on her feelings later.