Chapter 12

In the dark, Jason sat in bed, dribbling the basketball against the floor. For a few seconds, the rhythm of the bounce would be consistent.

Thump, thump, thump.

After a few bounces, though, his hand would be struck with searing pain, like feeling the blade pierce his hand over and over, causing the ball to fall to the floor. For the three in the hallway, the anguished screams continued to ring out between the thumping of the ball, causing their hairs to stand on end every time it fell.

After a while of standing and listening, Loba’s eye began to twitch with irritation, causing him to jolt off the wall, starting towards the stairs.

“Let's leave the kid; I think he needs some space. Let’s go eat, or something.”

Flinching with every wail from behind the door, Panka apprehensively followed Loba to the stairwell, looking back down briefly towards Biji before following the rest of the way.

“I’m going to check on Uddi,” she whispered down the stairs before heading upstairs.

Her whole body was shaking. Biji remained in front of the door.

“Looks like I'm the only one left…” She despaired at the thought of going into the room alone. And yet, taking a deep, shaky breath as the cold air of the house seeped into her lungs, Biji pushed the door open softly.

…

“...Jason?” Biji called out quietly.

The door creaked open softly, letting light from the hallway into the room. Jason was sitting upright in bed, having discarded his jacket and shirt, leaving his skin bare besides his chain and exposed to the cool air. His head turned to Biji softly. His eyes wouldn’t meet hers as he clutched his hand, gripping it with force enough to crush it.

Scars and bruises lined his upper arms and torso, the crest on his wrist pulsing and ebbing as it wrapped itself around his arm, spiraling down to his wounded hand. But what caught Biji’s eye most was his chest.

The bronze skin looked warped and melted, with a large, grotesque scar that webbed out below and along his collarbone and down his abdomen. Finally, Jason looked up, his hollow eyes regarding Biji softly. “Oh, hey. Come in. And close the door,” he said, gesturing to her to sit down.

Biji sat down on the edge of the bed, her lightly glowing eyes transfixed by his scar, despite her trying to hide her staring. They sat quietly for a brief moment as Biji tried in vain to fix her focus. “...That's, uh… Sorry. For staring, I mean,” she stammered.

“...Were you going to tell me about it?” she sputtered out. Jason chuckled dryly.

“It’s not a cool epic story, unfortunately.” Lightly touching the skin, Jason averted his eyes from Biji, fixing them on the mattress beneath him. “When I was maybe 15, one day after all of my school clubs, I came home to my mom chewing out my brother. It was definitely something stupid, like not doing his homework.” He chuckled. “Hell, at this point it feels like it's been so long I can barely remember what it was about.”

Jason’s eyes shut tightly for a moment, as if he had been pinched. “She had a hard day at work, and when I came into the kitchen to tell her to lay off him, we got into a screaming match. It was a pretty bad one.” His grip on his chest tightened, causing the skin to warp more under the pressure of his fingers.

“She didn't mean to hurt me. She was just too stressed, tired, or angry to think straight.” He paused, freezing as his hand almost began to dig into his skin.

“Maybe I just want to think that.”

He was quiet, letting the air outside blow and the sound ring through the room for a while before continuing. “That was the night I decided to move me and Yuzo out. My mom begged, screamed, and cried for hours while I packed. She held onto me so hard when I tried to walk out that she left scars on my shoulders with her nails.”

His voice had gone shrill due to the tightness of his throat. “But I still left. I can still hear her sobbing from behind that door, so clearly. It's the last time I spoke to her.”

Biji worked up the nerve to pull herself closer on the bed, placing her hand beside Jason’s leg as he squeezed the bedsheets. “We moved into a crappy single bedroom, which was completely empty. I remember spending hours moving all of Yuzo’s stuff from the old apartment into his room myself.’

Emma's parents brought her over to see me and dropped off some food for the night, not really knowing what was going on. Her mom gave me some old pans, bowls, and plates. The bowls have ducks on them.” Despite a small smile creeping onto his face, a tear started to form in the corner of Jason’s eye.

“That night, I remember sitting with Emma and Yuzo on the floor, eating pizza and ice cream, and watching movies on my crappy laptop until they passed out. I carried them to Yuzo’s bed. Then, I stared at the ceiling for hours.” Quickly wiping the tear from his eye, Jason took a deep breath before looking up at Biji.

“I did everything I could to provide for my brother, to validate my choice. I worked myself to death every day, I barely slept, I got A’s in all my classes, and I was the ace on the basketball team. I graduated high school with my full ride through college. After a while, I barely even felt alive anymore.”

“That's why I practice the game every day. If I were to, say, lose a hand,” he raised his bandaged hand weakly, “it’d be the end of everything. My life would be worthless.” Biji stayed quiet for a moment. Then, she moved beside Jason, gently placing her hand in his lap.

“... I’m sorry… I don't know what college is or what an A means… I don't really understand your world… But I do understand that your life means more than just pushing yourself until you die.”

Biji's voice, already soft, had turned to a whisper. Despite this, she spoke with a resolve that took Jason by surprise. “I won't let you let it be.”

“...Who made that your choice?” Jason chuckled, the sullen look not having lifted from his face, causing Biji’s hand to tighten on the blanket. “It’s not, but if you keep living like this, with your head in Manusya, you’ll lose a lot more than your hand.”

Jason’s eyes widened, swallowing hard before pulling himself away. "... You don't get it, Biji. Without this hand, without the ability to dribble that ball with this damn hand, even just for just one day, I have no life to go back to. It's over,” his voice raising slightly.

“Then build something new! Here, with us!’ Biji clenched her jaw, shooting up from the bed as she pleaded with Jason. “I know Naraka isn't the best; I've lived here my whole life, and I've been through my fair share of pain here. But you’ve been given something here.”

Her voice grew louder, and the air around her started to buzz before her voice was reduced back to a whisper. “Please… I've tried my best to give you something to care about; I can't lose you too.” Her lip quivered slightly as she quickly clasped her hands over her mouth. “...Why? There's nothing special about me; I'm nobody.” Jason’s eyes fell to the ground as the anger in Biji’s face melted back into dejection.

His voice began to tremble again. “Why am I special here, special to you? There's something you're not telling me, and if you can't even give me that…!” He raised his volume for an instant before leaving Biji with a silent prompt. She lowered her eyes, unable to meet Jason's gaze.

Sighing deeply, he grabbed his shirt and jacket from the bedside. “...I’m going out for some air.” Biji remained in the room, listening to two doors close behind her, seemingly unable to move.