Memory Sickness: Astray part 2

Aiko looks to Crimzon, “I am an Astray-Walker by their definition, and I believe that the reason why someone cannot remember anything from a certain point in their lives here, is because at some point they were taken over by an Astray-Walker. Someone from another world somehow was able to come into consciousness into someone of this world and take over their body.”

Irin disturbed by the thought, “Then what happens to the conscious that belonged here in their actual body!? Where do they go?”

Crimzon ponders everything as Aiko anticipates his response, she waits. Then Crimzon tries to gather his words, “Okay, I also know that I am from another world. And so, I am by definition an Astray-Walker. By theory that also means that the conscious in this body could return or maybe died, which would allow my conscious to take over this body.”

“Jeez Crimzon, when you put it that way now, I feel like it’s a possession of sort.” Irin is stern but the idea and theories take time for her to comprehend. “Okay, if you are from another world, then what happened to you in your world and why can you remember that you are from your world, and I can’t remember anything other than living here in this place with you?”

“I am from my world and before I woke up here, I died. Someone who I don’t believe from my world, but another world came and killed me. In that world right before I died, and right before I died, I met a girl named Mirai.”

As Crimzon mentions Mirai’s name, the unfazed girl looks intently with curiosity directly at Crimzon. She begins to think, and her mind begins to race as though she realizes something.

“Did the Mirai you meet look like me?” Mirai smiles.

“No, she was much older than us, here anyway. In my world that Mirai did not look like you she was probably in her twenties.”

“I was hoping maybe it was me, because that way I know I’ll always run into you.”

Irin and Crimzon smile at Mirai’s comments realizing that she has grown attached to them in a short amount of time that they lived together. Crimzon backtracks his thoughts and looks at Irin to return to her question.

“Irin, as a theory maybe you can’t remember anything before living here with us because for a time someone else was living as you. Maybe you were able to make your way back to your body and that conscious had to return to its own. In my opinion maybe when your conscious reentered your body, your memory was taken by the previous conscious possessing your body.”

Aiko in amazement, “I couldn’t have said it better myself. I also believe that Crimzon’s theory is what makes the most sense, theoretically of course. Queen Aurora has been following everything she can about the conditions of Astray. She hopes that this is only a temporary situation and not something that is an ongoing phenomenon.”

“It all makes sense, theoretically. But how is this possible with a person’s soul moving in and out of another existence?! And if both of you are from another world, then did you come from the same world?” Irin’s mind races through all the possibilities mentioned, “I’m going to need a nap after we’re done here.”

“I died as well from my world,’ Aiko has a somber expression, ‘I couldn’t live a long life. I died because of a rare disease that didn’t have a cure. In my world I did know a Crimzon, and he was very caring as a friend. Even if the Crimzon sitting in front of me may not be from my world, I can tell he is also kind and caring. You remind me of him.”

“I don’t remember an Aiko from my life in my world. However, you remind me of someone that I used to play video games with, a little. You have the same personality, and you talk to me the same way. I’m not sure if we’re from the same world but at least Astray-Walker makes sense. That means I may be sucked back to my world if my body is still alive?”

Pondering the thought, Aiko says, “It is a possibility. I died in my world so I wouldn’t be able to go back. That means I’m permanently here until I die in this world. This is interesting. Crimzon, so you’re certain that you died? Because it would explain why the Crimzon from this world would have so many episodes of memory sickness Astray.”

Irin’s eyes widen realizing that the cause of memory sickness episodes over the years was the Crimzon from this world trying to come back to its body. She begins to sigh, and her eyes begin to water slightly. Mirai observing Irin, realizing the context and gravity of what is said, leans into Irin to comfort her.

Aiko stands up and makes her way to Irin and embrace her, “Irin it will be okay.”

“How is this okay?! The Crimzon I know may be dead in another world! All the Crimzon’s that came and went were all different and didn’t know me. I miss him, I miss everything I did with him. He was all that I had to anchor me in all this uncertainty.”

Crimzon makes his way to Irin and kneels in front of her as she hangs her head in despair. She lost someone more times than she realized. She questions her identity and authenticity. Crimzon wipes her falling tears and with a soft voice as he tries to comfort her.

“Irin, I may not be the Crimzon you know. My name in my world was Dana Fukushima and I died. I woke up here in this world with you this morning. I am now Crimzon, I know you have lost many things recently in a short time, but you have also gained more. You learned about the Astray, the truth that happened to you and Crimzon. You have me, Mirai and Aiko now. We are never promised tomorrow, but today we can choose to live.”

Irin with her head hanging down sniffles. She gains control of her tears grabbing onto the words spoken. No identity. The loss of someone she knew. No real answers.

“’We can choose…to live’”, Irin raises her head and engages her eyes with Crimzon, “Then I choose to live. Please help me to live, to live as who I am. To live to find the truth of who I am. Please help me to live.”

Crimzon can only smile as he understands Irin’s response. Irin is choosing to accept what she doesn’t understand. She chooses to live and create herself as she finds herself along the way living. Mirai take Irin’s hand and guides her to the bedroom to get some rest.

“Come Irin, I need a nap too. All those big words were very exhausting.”

“Mirai, did you even understand what we were saying?”

“Yup! I understood. You also like Crimzon too!”

“Hey! You’re talking too loud. You’re making my head sore.”

Mirai guides Irin to her room laughing and teasing each other as their voices fade. Crimzon stands up and meets eyes with Aiko softly smiling she gestures them to sit again. Once seated, Aiko looks over the gear, picks up the light pistol and inspects it taking out the magazine and pulling the barrel open, then sets it on the table.

“It’s a good selection. I see you must be incorporating some game theory into your strategy. I don’t blame you.”

“Is it a bad decision?”

“No, you’re pretty spot on for choosing the selections you’ve made. A pistol for range attacks and a sword for closer attacks, then if all else fails you’ll go hand to hand like Irin. You definitely remind me of my friend back in my world.”

“Was his name Crimzon?”

“Yes and No. We never met in real life, but Crimzon was his gamertag and we stumbled upon each other on an online video game, a few actually. He utilized firearms when he could and on occasion with the sword. Hands down though he was the most strategic for our group and could get us out of a bind.”

“You remind me of a player I also met online in my world. She was great with a sword, probably the best in most online games. I only remember her username; we never met in person. Our clan were able to meet in real life but I lived thousands of miles from them, so I couldn’t. You would’ve like the clan members, pretty much everyone were able to use a sword.”

“I’m sorry you couldn’t meet them. It sounds like you had a good group going before you got here.”

“Thanks. I appreciate that.”

“Crimzon, if things go well at the Rite please trust Lori and Kana. I’m sure they will want the three of you to join them in the kingdom, and if what we discussed about the Astray is true, then you may not need any medical attention.”

“What will you do after we leave here? You’re not going to go back with Lori and Kana?”

“I will eventually, there is something me and Elsa will be looking into with the new information we discussed. Although most of it is theory, it is backed by our personal experience, yours and mine. Who would’ve thought that getting Isekai-ed was a thing that truly happened?”

Crimzon laughs at the remark, “I’m surprised you know that term and didn’t use it to describe what we were talking about earlier.”

Aiko chuckles, “No, it would confuse them more. For now, it’s probably best to stick to their terminologies. Well before I go make a call to Elsa and Kana, are there any questions that I can answer?”

Crimzon ponders through the catalog of questions in his mind, “There is. Do you have any idea who this boy Crimzon or Irin were before all this?”

Aiko tries to recall, “From what the royal guard did find was that there were no missing persons reported for either of the two. No family, nothing. We concluded that they might’ve been abandoned due to their age at the time.”

“Would it be possible that the two of us may have been test subjects before Atlas approached Queen Aurora? It would make for a quick retrieval to play on the queen’s emotions of two young children dying from a mysterious beast, the chimera. Just something to think about.”

Trying to reflect deeply on all her counts of her memories, Aiko begins to race through her memories. she tries to recall anything that may match what Crimzon said. She takes a deep breathe,

“Only way we would be able to find out is that we would need to find those files that were missing,’ Aiko pauses, ‘we do have records on some of those that left the orphanage after being treated. We could follow up if they encountered any episodes of Astray. That would be the only place I can think of to start. I’ll look into it. Go get some rest.”

“Okay. I will.”

Aiko leaves to go and make the call to Elsa and Kana. Crimzon picks himself up and makes his way to his room, on his way he passes by Irin’s room to find the door open. As he passes, he sees Irin and Mirai snuggled together in deep sleep, he closes the door and continues to his room. Upon entering his room, he closes the door behind him *click* the door locks and falls into bed. Staring at the ceiling, thoughts race through his mind. Memories from his previous life, images and soundtracks all come flooding in as finally the weight of his eyes force him to sleep.