Chapter 5: The Ghostly Girl Group

My suspicion festered over the next week. Every time my phone buzzed, it was a text from Joshua.

“Need a talisman for ‘Finding Inner Peace and Also Lost Car Keys.’ Have a ghost who was a really stressed-out chauffeur.”

“How about one for ‘Epic Musical Talent’? The piano guy is driving everyone nuts with that one note.”

“URGENT: Need a ‘Get Over Your Fear of Heads’ talisman. The horseman is having a bit of an identity crisis.”

With each talisman I made, I felt a growing sense of complicity. I was the chief enabler of Joshua’s weird ghost-collecting hobby. I tried to tell myself it was for a good cause, but the image of him acting like the producer of a bizarre reality show was burned into my mind.

Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to see what was really going on. I baked a batch of apology-cookies (for whatever I was about to witness) and headed over to his mansion unannounced.

I let myself in with the spare key he gave me years ago for emergencies. I considered this a “creepy potential harem” emergency. The house was quiet, but I could hear music coming from the ballroom. Not the one-note piano dirge, but actual, upbeat pop music.

I tiptoed down the hall and peeked through the cracked ballroom doors.

And my brain promptly short-circuited.

The room was filled with about a dozen of the transformed ghosts. They were… rehearsing. A full-on, synchronized dance routine. The ridiculously handsome Shakespearean ghost was in the front, leading the choreography with dramatic lunges. The serene zen-goddess was gracefully spinning, somehow managing to look peaceful even while doing a complicated turn. The swashbuckling pirate ghost was using a broomstick as a prop sword in his routine.

Joshua was standing off to the side, wearing a tracksuit and a whistle, like a deranged gym coach.

“No, no, Kaito!” he shouted, pointing at the pirate. “Your swash needs more buckle! And Emi, more serenity in your spins! Think ‘drifting cherry blossom,’ not ‘blender’!”

He spotted me in the doorway and his face lit up. “Amy! Perfect timing! What do you think?”

I just stared, dumbfounded. “What… is this?”

“This?” he said, gesturing to the dancing ghosts with a grand sweep of his arm. “This is the future! Meet the ‘Phantom Idols’!”

The ghosts stopped dancing and struck a pose. A ridiculously cool, perfectly synchronized group pose.

“Phantom… Idols?” I repeated, my voice barely a whisper. The harem theory was wrong. This was so, so much weirder.

“Of course!” Joshua said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “Think about it! They’re all super attractive, they’ve got amazing backstories, and they have unique supernatural talents! One of them can literally phase through solid objects. That’s a stage trick you can’t buy! They’re the perfect idol group!”

The serene ghost, Emi, floated over to us. “Joshua-san believes our unique talents could bring joy to the living,” she said, her voice as calm as a placid lake.

“We shall conquer the hearts of mortals with our art!” declared the actor ghost, whose name was apparently Ren.

“And find me booty!” added Kaito, the pirate, earning an elbow in the ribs from Ren. “I mean… find the booty of… fan adoration.”

I looked at Joshua, my expression a mixture of horror and disbelief. “So your master plan… your grand ‘ghost rehabilitation project’… was to turn them into a J-Pop group?”

“And K-Pop! We’re versatile!” he corrected me. “It’s the perfect way for them to move on! Instead of lingering because of old regrets, they can create new, happy memories! They can get closure by achieving fame and adoration! It’s foolproof!”

I put my head in my hands. “Joshua, you are, without a doubt, the most insane person I have ever met.”

“Insanely brilliant, you mean!” He clapped his hands. “Alright, Phantoms! From the top! Let’s nail that chorus!”

As the music started up again, I watched them. It was completely absurd. The little girl ghost was shyly practicing her steps in the back. The former headless horseman—now a tall, silent type with a ridiculously cool leather jacket—was surprisingly good at popping and locking. The jam recipe lady was the group’s designated ‘mom,’ passing out spectral water bottles.

They were all smiling. Genuinely, truly happy. They weren’t being forced into this. They were having the time of their afterlives.

My suspicion and anger began to melt away, replaced by a profound sense of bewilderment. Joshua’s methods were insane. His logic was questionable at best. But… his heart was in the right place. He had taken a collection of sad, lonely spirits and given them a purpose. A weird, glittery, dance-filled purpose.

As I watched them practice, I noticed something else. When they moved, their bodies would occasionally flicker. When Emi spun, her hand became transparent for a split second. When Kaito lunged, his foot phased slightly into the floorboards. The talismans were a powerful fix, but they weren't perfect. They were like a magical battery, keeping these ghosts solid. But I had to wonder… what would happen if the batteries ran out? Or what would happen if someone… took them off?

The thought sent a shiver down my spine. This whole operation was a lot more fragile than it looked.