Renascentia Diaboli

Death man’s final frontier. The undiscover'd country, from whose bourn no traveler returns. Within an endless abyss, feeling nothing.

Was this my mind speaking or something else?

Rather maddening, my life has become or was.

Death at thirty-two, trying to end slavery in a world I don’t care for… It really was a bad joke.

The Roman poet Horace was a rather well-known poet in Rome, and one of his quotes that survived through the years was “Dulce et Decorum Est Pro Patria Mori.” A translation to English would be, “It is sweet to die for one’s country.” This quote was used in a poem about the war to end all wars. It's a rather ironic name, as it has been joked about before. The almost pornographic nature if the United States ever got its hands on this quote.

I can’t say much.

I was a fool who died for my ideals.

And what is a country but a mere ideal?

But it was an ideal, my ideal, no others, that took my life.

Even if this was not my land, I still bleed for it.

For the evils of slavery are too heinous for a man to ignore.

Whether they had become spoils of war or were stolen from their native land or of it for a crime, the punishment of slavery is too heinous of a thing for any.

But what is man but that of heinous acts done to another?

I know that I shall never feel the pain that all of man holds upon itself, but I try to imagine their pain as the Devil himself would feel it.

Why would I dare call myself The Devil?

It was for a number of reasons, but if I were to pick one, it would be the yearning for freedom that every man holds deep within their selfs. But as it seems, I had perished within the battle for freedom; my last thought would be hoping the soul of John Brown will continue to march on.

I closed my nonexistent eyes.

And succumb to the abyss being erased

from time…

from space…

from reality…

“Wake up.

Come on, wake up.”

A feminine voice kept repeating these words until I opened my eyes.

“Good, you’re finally awake.”

This woman stood over my body.

Kicking at my leg.

I looked at her and took a drink.

“Can a man no longer rest in peace? Is that yet another thing this land takes from its inhabitants?”

“I am Amaterasu, and I’m about to bring you back to life.”

“Why, the last time I bashed a man's head in until he was dead for the crime of announcing.

Then I killed hundreds of men; why would you bring a being such as myself back to life?”

“The first reason is you freed hundreds of slaves.

And you helped those people in that cave.”

“Rather poor reasons if that’s all.”

“What, do you want me to retell you your whole life story? It’s your tale; you tell it.”

“What are you in the first place?”

“I am a goddess, one that you are being pretty rude to.”

“Hey, you’re the one who brought me here.”

I was still lying upon the ground when this self-called “goddess” started to grow, and a bright light shone around her.

“I’m already dead.

You gonna fucking blind me too?”

“V, you will return to this world once again, but know this: when death comes to you once more, it will be your end.

Now scram.“

The sound of wind hitting leaves invaded my ears.

Sunlight hit my face, causing me to open my eyes.

And just like that, I was back in the land of the living… Fuck you, Shakespeare.

But it's rather anticlimactic, isn't it?

Well, that's life.

In reality the bad guy gets shot in the face before he’s able to give his speech.

And the bad guy may not even be the bad guy…

Where was I going with this?

Who knows?

Fuck it all.

Pain had filled within like a fire moving throughout a forest. My body has been this sore for at least ten years. I moved my hand towards my flask to ease the pain as always, but all I found was something that felt like bandages. One of those wrap bandages.

Mein Gott!

The Horror.

And other such reactions I would say if I had the energy.

Looking around, it seems I’ve been moved from the great outdoors to someone’s home, and it seems that I am nude. But my body was covered in a blanket; with that, it appears that I’m lying upon a bed.

Well, you gotta take what you get.

Better start investigating.

Thud.

Rolled out of the bed onto the wood-paneled floor, it appears that I’m on the second floor of a house; this observation came from how the thud sounded. As well, it seems like I’m still in the middle of a forest; this also comes from audio evidence that I have gathered since I awoke and the smell.

I kept trying to walk, but my legs maintained their belief of bucking on me. If this was a stealth mission, I would have been dead fifty times over. Giving up on the construct of walking, I started to drag myself around to the desk that was across from the bed. Pulling myself up to look at the top of the desk, I found a note.

It read, “If you’re reading this, you have woken up finally. You're here because my wife was on a walk and found you covered in blood and mud. She felt bad and carried you back here. Cleaning your wounds and putting you in an extra room we had. Your clothes are in the drawer, and your other things are downstairs. So get your clothes on and things and leave.

P.S.

My wife said I was too rude on the last part, but I don’t trust you in the slightest and just want you to get out of my house.” I wouldn't trust me either.

Putting on my clothes, I continued to the floor below. Dragging myself all the way down. When I finally got my slow ass downstairs, I found two women inside a kitchen. One was cooking, and the other was reading the paper. The headline was “THE DEVIL IS DEAD!” It seems someone is happy about my death. The whole scene did bring me back to the past and living with Conrad and Tsuki. It was a rather funny feeling, don’t like it.

The women reading the paper saw me. “Hey, it looks like the stray that reeked of death has finally woken up.”

“Funny.

Can I get my knife and gun so I can leave?

I have got things to do.”

“Come on, Luna, give the man a break.

And you look at yourself; you can't even stand up. You are staying here till you’re healed.”

“Okay, I promise,” Luna grumbled.

“I’ve been through worse, and it seems I’ve long over stay a welcome (one that never existed).”

“No way, mister. I found you pretty much dead, so until you heal, you’re going to stay here.”

I looked at the woman whom the other women had called Luna. “Am I going to be able to change her mind?”

“No.”

I look back at the women cooking. “Fine.”

“Good, my name is Ruby, and I’m happy you’re awake.”

“The name’s V.”

“What kind of name is V?”

“Oh come on, Luna, don’t make fun of other people’s names.” The woman called Luna grumbled a bit muttered a apology and returned to reading.

The woman named Ruby looked at me and said, “I think V is a great name.”

This Ruby woman seemed too good for this world. I guess there are people like that in any world. But I can’t take much offense from Luna. I won’t want some dirty bastard standing in the middle of my kitchen either.

“I have a great idea. Why don’t you grab a seat and join us for breakfast?”

“I’m not much one for breakfast.”

“Well, it seems you’re not much for food. I’m not even too strong, and I was able to carry you back here. I actually thought you were a skeleton with some flesh left until I heard you breathing. Also, you regain your strength faster when full, so join us.” She patted the wooden table.

Man, I forgot how much I hated nice people.

“Come on, guy, haven’t you realized that she is going to get you to do what she wants no matter what?”

“Hey, Lunnnaaa.”

“Just telling the truth, Ruby.”

“Fine, I’ll join you.” Never been strong-armed into a bloody breakfast before.

“That’s great, sweetie. Oh, Luna, can you get his stuff out of the drawer?”

“Sure, honey.”

I could feel the life drain from me once more with all this love suffocating me. I feel like a damn third wheel, another reason I shouldn’t be here. Should be somewhere blood flows as much as the booze, not some slice of heaven two people made for their selfs.

The sound of a drawer opening, and Luna pulled out a wooden crate. She placed it on the table and went back to her paper. Dragging my sorry, broken-ass body over to the table, I took a seat. Taking a look inside I started to take out my equipment checking if everything was there… It all seemed to be there.

There was a bullet within the chamber of my pistol, so I removed the magazine and discharged the round, catching it. Checking my magazine, I found there were about 8 bullets, including the one I discharged and was putting back into the mag.

There were 4 more magazines and 2 grenades.

I placed each of them in my jacket.

There was also my harness for my Jericho and holster for my knife in there. My knife was already in its holster, so I took it out and looked it over.

Seemed fine.

Putting the harness on was somewhat painful, but the bandages that covered most of my body lessened the pain.

I was also finally reunited with my oldest friend, my flask, and started to drink it down like water.

“They say you shouldn’t drink when healing from a serious wound.”

“They can try and say that when they’re in this much bloody pain, then I’ll give them my old pal; until then, I’m going to celebrate my unification the only way I know how.”

“Luna, right, V you shouldn’t drink that poison when trying to heal.”

I feel like a mother keeps talking to me when Ruby talks.

She finished breakfast and passed it out.

For the next few days, I healed, thinking about my next steps.

For some reason Ash Williams killing Deadites with his chainsaw and boomstick crossed my mind. He was never cut open while fighting the evil dead.

I tried to walk around to get my movement back with exercise, and I continued my hard drinking even with all the protests from Ruby.

At least in this battle I was much more stubborn.

A few days more pass on, and I was healed enough to move. Even if pain still consumed me whole, how could the Devil complain about such a thing?

I dared not try leaving during the day because Ruby would just drag me back and tell me to heal a bit longer, and I couldn’t argue because she would be right.

But I failed to believe I deserve to stay any longer. Already put these people out far too much as is.

“I must thank you both for all your help. For letting me heal under a roof and feeding a fool. I would tell you farewell in person, but in the few days I have known you, I have realized that I could not say what I needed to. So farewell Ruby and Luna. And stay safe and stay in love, for in this world what more can a person have than another loving person to live and then one day die with?” I pen within my notebook and tear a piece out, trying to make as little noise as possible.

Placing it on the table where the note that told me what to do when I first awoke was. As if this note were a reply to the original. I left down the stairs. It seems like I was actually rather good at stealth when I had full access to my legs.

Well, I believed that until a voice appeared behind me. “I guess you’re the type of guy who leaves without saying thanks.”

“I left a note. It says why I’m leaving in the middle of the night. I’m thankful, but I have to leave.

“Well, all I have to say is don’t get yourself killed out there. I don’t want to be carrying your body back here.”

“I’ll make sure to not be dead in your front yard again.”

“V!”

“Okay, okay, I promise to be safe out there. Promise me you will be safe as well.”

“I got Luna to protect me so don’t worry about me… Goodbye, V.”

“I have a good life, Ruby.”

I was stricken with melancholy, knowing the only thing I would witness in my journey ahead would be horrors that no man should see.

I paused for a moment before pulling open the door… And force myself to walk out.

My bike was parked right outside their house.

So, I got on and left.

Because I knew I wasn’t worth this.

For all the sins I committed and the blood I spilled.

These people… these nice, loving, kind, great people—I just couldn’t stay any longer with them.

I did want to drag them into the pits of hell with me or drag hell to them.

A warm wind hit my face.

The only sound was the engine beneath me.

Am once again alone… As it should.

The only thing I could do now was to become stronger. Before I can try and find the others.

I looked through my mind, and I found a way to grow stronger. Well, I didn’t feel like cutting off my right hand, so a boomstick will have to do for now.

Because…

Good...

Bad...

I'm just the guy with the gun.