Breath with Me

My eyes opened wide as blood began to flow through me again. I regained focus, seeing the ceiling once more. All of a sudden, my right hand grabbed the sink while my other hand caught the towel rack. My back was still arched, my left leg sticking out in the air. I couldn’t feel anything; my body moved on its own, like it was catching me.

*~"I-I got you!"*

I felt the numbness fade from my body, pressure building between my hands and legs as I struggled to hold myself up. Slowly, I moved forward, my legs firm against the floor, and my hand swung around to grab the sink, both hands gripping it tightly. I finally found my balance again, but my head began to slouch forward, curving toward the sink. My legs trembled as I looked down.

I didn’t know what to think. My mind was completely blank. I felt like I wasn’t even here. This voice, this thing that was controlling me... I wasn’t thinking, yet I felt like I was. Still slouched forward, my right hand grabbed the top of my head and yanked me upright, my legs still shaking as if I were balancing on a string.

*"~Just breathe! Breathe!"*

The reflection, the girl I was staring at, came into focus again as my eyes adjusted. Was she talking to me? This voice... this wasn’t in my imagination. I actually think she was telling me to breathe. My mouth opened and I inhaled. My lungs expanded, filling with air like a vacuum. I felt my chest swelling, growing tighter with every breath. I couldn’t stop breathing in.

*"My chest... too much... it’s... it’s..."*

*"~Oh! Sorry!"*

Air burst from my lungs as if I were the big bad wolf from the three little pigs, blowing everything out at once. My head bent forward again as I looked at the floor, my hands gripping the sink. As the last bit of air left my body, I began to cough.

*"~Sorry! Sorry! I didn’t mean to..."*

Feeling slowly returned to my body. The cold porcelain of the sink pressed against my palms as I coughed. My legs steadied, then my head. While looking down, I took deep breaths, trying to calm myself. I finally regained my energy. Slowly, I looked up at the mirror, half-expecting the girl to jump at me.

When my eyes met the reflection, she was still there. Her pinkish eyes, pale face, and white hair stared back at me. We were both breathing hard, but I still didn’t see myself.

I raised a hand to my face, and she mimicked me. My skin felt real and warm. My other hand followed, cupping my cheeks. My face grew hot, and I blushed.

"~This... this isn’t me," I whispered to myself.

*"~You think so? That isn’t me either!"* My mouth moved on its own before I realized it.

I gulped hard and shook my head, covering my eyes with both hands.

"No, no, no! This can’t be happening. This is a dream. A nightmare!"

I peeked through my fingers, but the girl in the mirror did the same. I froze and let my hands drop.

"What the hell is going on? Why is Bloody Mary looking at me?!"

Suddenly, I lost control again. My mouth and body moved without me.

*"~You know, that’s a little rude..."* I said to myself, my arms crossing as my face formed a pout. My cheeks flushed red. I shook my head hard, trying to regain control.

"What the hell! Are you controlling me?" I shouted, stepping back toward the bathroom wall, still in shock.

*"~I don’t know. You tell me. After all, you seem to know what Bloody Mary looks like."* My arms crossed again as if I were flustered.

"Gah! Stop that!" I turned back toward the mirror. My reactions changed instantly, one after another. My heart pounded faster, and my breathing grew heavy.

I stared into the reflection. Images flashed through my head...that night, standing beside myself, trapped in darkness, gasping for air. I couldn’t take it anymore.

"Wake up! Wake up!" I yelled, slapping my face several times.

*"~Ow! Ow! Okay! Okay! Stop! Stop!"* My hand froze midair, inches from my cheek.

*"~You know I can feel that too, right?"* My hand lowered slowly as my face shifted to annoyance. I sighed, still unable to move on my own.

*"You know, I haven’t felt pain in so long..."* My head turned toward my hand. Suddenly, I felt emotional, sadness welling up inside me. I shook my head and grasped it tightly.

"What the hell!" I yelled, frustrated.

Mixed emotions swirled inside me. Two thoughts fought for control — annoyance and sorrow, anger and sadness. One moment I felt like myself, and the next I didn’t. The pressure built inside my skull, giving me a splitting headache. I grabbed my head tightly, staring at the mirror as the girl mimicked me.

*Am I going mental?* I thought.

*"I don’t think so!"*

*Did you just read... my thoughts?*

*"Uh... no?"*

"Ahhh!" I yelled at the top of my lungs.

This...isn't...real...