Chapter 52: The "Bloody Twilight" Confession

A week.

A full week of this agonizing silence.

I can't take it.

I am 'Bloody Twilight'. I don't 'take' things. I break them.

And this silence is breaking me.

My grades are slipping. I can't focus. I keep staring at the back of Fuji's *stupid, *perfect, white-haired head.

He is a wall of ice.

He's polite. He's distant. He's 'Isuzu-san'.

It's unbearable.

After school.

I see him. He's leaving class.

My heart does that stupid pounding thing.

I have to do this. Now.

No 'plan'. No 'strategy'. Just... 'aggro'.

My way.

I stalk out of the classroom. I see him at his locker.

I am walking fast.

I pass the school gates.

I see him. Daiki.

He's there. Again. The 'Pathetic King'.

He is holding... is that a bouquet of flowers? Black roses?

Oh, my God. He is such a dork.

He sees me. He starts to say something.

"Twilight... I... these are..."

I don't stop.

I am on a mission.

I look right through him. The same way Fuji looks through me.

It works.

He freezes. He just stands there... holding his stupid goth flowers.

He's apologizing in his own way. By being a public embarrassment.

Fine. Whatever.

I don't have time for 'Side-Jerk'. I am dealing with 'Main-Jerk'.

I am back inside the school in seconds.

Where did he go?

Student Council room.

He always goes there.

I run. I don't care who sees.

I get to the door. It's closed.

I don't knock.

I slam it open.

WHAM.

The door hits the wall.

Fuji Kenji is sitting at the desk. Alone.

He jumps. He actually jumps.

His perfectly-ordered papers... scatter.

I did it. I broke the 'Ice Prince'.

His eyes are wide.

"Aoi?"

He used my name. He's in shock.

Good.

I am breathing hard. My heart is pounding.

"Don't. 'Isuzu-san' me," I huff, pointing at him.

He stands up. His 'Ice Prince' mask is slamming back into place.

"Isuzu-san," he says, his voice cold, but I can see him shaking. He's mad. "This is the Student Council room. You can't just..."

"I can!" I snap. "I am DONE. Okay? Done!"

"Done with what? Harassing..."

"Done with THIS! This... 'silence'! This 'nothing'! You're mad! Just BE MAD!"

I am so frustrated. I hit the desk. Hard.

He flinches.

"I am a fool!" I shout.

He stops. He blinks.

That is not what he expected.

"What?" he whispers.

"I AM A FOOL!" I yell again, louder. "A *total, *complete, idiot! Are you happy?"

I am so embarrassed. My face is on fire.

"I am Aoi Isuzu! I am 'Bloody Twilight'! I am supposed to be 'strong' and 'smart'! And I am a FOOL!"

I am pacing... but the anger is... shaking. It's not 'Bloody Twilight' rage. It's... desperation. My voice cracks.

"I... I believed him! I believed that 'gamer jerk'! That 'liar'!"

I stop. I look at him.

My eyes are hot. Oh, no. No, no, no. I am NOT doing this.

"He said he 'saved me', and my *stupid, *foggy, drowned brain just... BELIEVED HIM!"

A stupid, hot tear just... escapes. I wipe it away. Furious.

"I was so stupid! It was 'easy'! It was...'romantic'!"

I say the word like it's 'garbage'.

"And you... you were the one! YOU saved me! You did... 'the thing'! The 'CPR'! You breathed air into my lungs and all I did was 'ignore' you and 'laugh' with the 'liar' on the balcony!"

Fuji is silent. He is just... staring at me.

And he's just... watching me. Watching 'Bloody Twilight'... cry.

I hate this. I hate feeling this 'weak'.

My 'rage' is gone. It's just... this awful 'shaking'.

"I'm... I'm sorry," I choke out. The words are so hard. "I am so sorry, Fuji."

I look him right in the eye. More stupid tears.

"I was a fool. I know I hurt you. I saw you on the beach. You looked... so sad. And it's my fault."

I take a shaky breath.

"Please..." I whisper. This is the hardest part. "Please, Fuji... forgive me."

Silence.

Fuji just looks at me.

He looks... broken.

"Why?" he asks. His voice is quiet.

"Why what?" I snap, the tears making me angry again.

"Why... did you believe him?" Fuji asks. "Why was it 'easy'? Why... did you 'want' to?"

Oh, no.

He is asking the 'real' question.

Because he thinks I 'like' Daiki.

This is it.

My 'Bloody Twilight' armor is gone. I am just 'Aoi'.

And I am terrified.

"Because... because... UGH!"

I can't say it.

This is harder than any fight.

"Because it... it made 'sense'!" I blurt out.

"What 'sense'?"

"That I... that I would 'like'... him!"

Fuji flinches. Just a little. But I see it.

His 'Ice Prince' mask is back. He thinks I just confirmed it.

"No! Idiot!" I shout, panicked, wiping my face. "Not... him! It made 'sense' that I was an 'idiot'!"

I am messing this up!

I take a deep breath.

I am 'Bloody Twilight'. I do not 'lose'.

I walk right up to him.

I am centimeters from his *stupid, *perfect, confused face.

"I didn't want to believe 'Daiki'. Okay?" I say, my voice low and shaking.

"I believed him because it was 'easier' than... 'this'."

"This?" he whispers. He can't move. I have him 'pinned'.

"Than... 'you', you moron!" I confess.

My face is so hot it is going to melt.

"I... I like YOU! Okay? Fuji-Jerk! Ice Prince! My stupid 'Rival'!"

I am crying my confession. This is so pathetic.

"I... like you! Not the 'Gamer-Jerk'! YOU! And when I thought I had 'drowned' and 'insulted' my 'hero'... it was 'easier' to believe the 'liar' than to face the 'truth'! The 'truth' that I am a 'fool' who is 'in like' with her 'rival'!"

Silence.

I am breathing like I just ran a marathon.

Fuji Kenji is staring at me.

His mouth is open.

Just a little.

His face is... blank. No. Not blank.

Shock.

*Pure, unfiltered shock.

The 'Ice Prince' has melted.

And then...

He does the last thing I ever expect.

He laughs.

Not a 'bark'. Not a 'smirk'.

A real... soft... laugh.

"Aoi..." he breathes.

He reaches out. Slowly.

He touches my hair.

I freeze.

My 'instincts' scream 'break his arm'.

My 'heart' screams 'don't move'.

My heart wins.

"You... are unbelievable," he says, his voice shaking. From laughing.

"I... 'like' me?" he asks.

"Shut up," I hiss, my face on fire, sniffling. "I take it back."

"No. No 'take-backs'," he says, his smile fading into something... soft.

Oh, no. That look. That's worse than the 'ice'. It's... warm.

"I... I am *sorry, Aoi," he says.

"You're... what?"

"I am sorry," he repeats. "I was... frustrated. I was 'disgusted'. Not at you. At the 'situation'. At 'him'. And... at myself."

"At you?"

"I watched you on the balcony," he confesses. "Laughing. With him. Wearing his hoodie. And I thought... 'I lost'. I lost to 'him'. I saved your life... and he stole ... 'you'. I was... jealous."

Fuji Kenji. 'Mr. Perfect'.

Was 'jealous'.

Of 'Daiki'.

The world is ending.

"So I... I ran away," he mutters, looking ashamed. "I built the 'ice wall'. It was 'easier' than... facing 'this'. Facing 'you'."

He just threw my words back at me.

This jerk.

This *smart, *wonderful, stupid jerk.

I am so confused.

My 'rage' is gone. My 'sadness' is... fading.

Now I am just... this.

Staring at him.

He is still touching my hair.

I don't hate it.

"So... 'Ice Prince'?" I mutter.

"So... 'Bloody Twilight'?" he replies.

His face is still too close.

"You... are a 'fool'," he whispers.

"You... are a 'jerk'," I whisper back.

He smiles.

A real smile.

It is the most dazzling, annoying thing I have ever seen.

"We are... a mess," he concludes.

"Yeah," I breathe. "We are."

The school bell rings. The 'clean-up' bell.

We don't move.

The 'Ice Age' is over.

And I am... terrified.

And... I am... happy.

This is the worst.