Chapter 1 - She About My Mom’s Age

A brown eye stared into a camera lens and blinked.

Far too close for the camera to focus.

“Uh…how does this thing even work?…”

The still-too-close eye blinked again, staring into the lens. Willing it to work.

A small red flash reflected off his forehead.

“Oh! Must be on.”

Suddenly the eye backed away and a face came into view.

Dark hair matched the eyes on the now-visible face. A young face, clearly still in his teens.

“So, uh, hi. I guess.”

The boy started to speak to the camera.

“…I guess I should have scripted something. So…let’s call this take one.”

He stood a little straighter, pulling down on his loose, linen shirt that clung slightly to him in the heat to straighten out the wrinkles.

He cleared his throat to begin but was immediately overcome with a coughing fit and doubled over.

The wracking coughs continued.

Far too long.

His sternum seemed to almost bend into a concave arc within his chest.

Slowly. Eventually. The coughing began to abate and he straightened himself to look into his camera once again.

“Guess I shouldn’t have run here to do this.”

He gave a wry smile to the camera, tears still welling in his eyes from his painful fit.

“OK…let’s…” he turned his face into his inner elbow as another cough assailed him. “…Let’s try again.”

Another deep breath and he began.

“My name is Xavier. And I’m, uh, standing along what they call the Avenue of the Dead in Mexico. Well, in Teotihuacan. If I’m saying that right.”

He grimaced as he realized he likely butchered the pronunciation.

“And I…”

An odd buzzing-like sound interrupted him.

“What now?!” He turned his head left and right. Numerous tourists walked along the road towards the nearby pyramid temple but he couldn’t find the source of the noise.

He glanced at a nearby woman, about the age of his mother, whose face was obscured by her long hair as she bent forward, hands covering her mouth.

Maybe that woman there sneezed or something?

He stared back at his camera.

“So anyway. This is just a trial run anyway.”

He stood a little straighter again as he prepared to speak.

“I’m here because this place behind me is where they used to, um, sacrifice. You know. People. And uh, take their hearts.”

His hand covered his own chest protectively.

“And you see…my heart…isn’t worth very much right now.”

He took a longer, slow breath while trying to blink away the moisture collecting at the edges of his eyes.

“So…I’m here to give away my heart. They…they told me it won’t last the year anyway…”

The sudden weight of his words struck him and he bent forward, hands on his knees. His body now wracked with sobs instead of coughing.

After hearing his words, the older woman nearby reached out her hand towards him, but pulled it back. Unsure if she should intervene.

“This is why you’re practicing…” The boy said to himself.

Steeling himself, he straightened up and looked into his small camera sitting on the tripod in front of him once more.

“I’m going to give my heart…like they used to. Well…maybe not quite like they used to. I’m going to volunteer it. Here.” He pointed at the nearby temple.

“Maybe then…maybe my wish…will come true…”

A wail echoed nearby.

Xavier turned and saw the nearby woman staring at him.

Horrified.

“No!”

“What?”

“You can’t! You can’t do that!!”

“It’s…” His eyes narrowed. “It’s none of your business!” He finally stammered out.

Her hand sprung forward, pointing directly at his chest.

“You can’t do that! I lost my son! My Diego! Don’t make your mother turn out like me!”

He saw now that the collar of her shirt was wet. Dried streaks of what must have been tears crisscrossed her cheeks.

She wasn’t sneezing earlier. She was crying.

“Listen!” He began, almost snapping at her but pulled back. She looked too pitying in the moment and his anger at her interference quelled.

“Just…leave me alone. You don’t know. You don’t know what it’s like for me right now.” A tear formed in his left eye. “And…I’m doing this for her anyway! I need to make her forget all about me!” He finally mustered up the courage to respond.

“For her?!”

Xavier thought the woman looked horrified before. But the look on her face now was concentrated anguish.

“Just…I don’t know…arghhh…”

He turned away from the woman and snatched his camera off the tripod violently and began to stuff its pieces into his nearby backpack. His back turned to the woman; he was every bit the petulant teen hoping his problem would disappear if he only ignored it long enough.

He heard the woman’s chocked sob as he finished packing, but he couldn’t bear to turn towards her.

“Just…leave me alone.”

He ran.

At least he tried to.

Five hurried steps in and he could already feel the familiar tightness in his chest as his failing heart strained with the effort.

His right hand holding his backpack in place on his shoulder, his left found its all too common perch over the ribs of his left side. Holding. Stabilizing the ever-constricting muscles as he willed his body to move just a little more.

I’ll have to try again later…