What Goes on Backstage

My schedule returns to normal in the morning—or at least, that’s what I would have liked to have happen. Instead, I spend my precious morning prep coordinating with Kamegawa to squeeze in a weekly lunch for Kubo and Mia. With his drama schedule and my previous efforts to avoid him entirely, the task is far more daunting than expected. We finally settle on a plan for the first few weeks and agree to reconvene weekly to plan another month ahead.

“Thank you for agreeing to do this, Satou-san!” Kamegawa says. “I know it wasn’t easy, but isn’t it thrilling to think about the possibilities?” Her cheeks tint pink, definitely imagining Mia and Kubo becoming a couple for real.

I am actively trying not to think about the possibilities, thank you.

“Well, I felt guilty that Watanabe-san has been so busy. I’m glad we worked this out.” Lie.

“Do you mean that?” Kubo’s deep voice behind me makes me jump. 

Why is he in the breakroom again? More importantly, why is he always exactly where I don’t want him to be?!

“Of course—why wouldn’t I?” I laugh, thin and strained.

“It’s about time to head to the shoot, isn't it?” Kamegawa says, checking her watch. “Thank you again, Satou-san! We'll see you later!”

They leave together, and I slump into my chair. I enjoy a few, sweet moments of relaxing before it's time to embark on my own busy day. Mia has interviews, a variety show, and a commercial shoot back-to-back. A whirlwind of activity, but it's my usual whirlwind and I'm grateful to get back to it. 

“Mira!” Mia hugs me from behind my seat before settling into her own.

"Miss me?" I ask. 

“Of course! Kamegawa-san is lovely, but she isn’t you.”

I start the car and turn out of the parking lot.

“What was different? Everything go okay yesterday?”

"Mmhm," Mia says. “Nothing went wrong. She did great. But I missed having a friend, you know?”

Oh, I know.

"This just in, nationally renowned actress Mia Watanabe is absolutely hopeless without her dearest friend!" I tease.

“Oh, stop! How was Kubo-san? Still evil?”

I roll my eyes, even though she can't see.

“He’s not evil. I just don’t like him.”

“Because you think he likes me?”

"Because he does like you!"

Mia laughs, and I'm not sure she actually believes me. Though, she's always been like this: a bit oblivious to the affections of others. Back in high school together, boys would all come up to me trying to win my favor in order to ask her out. Him included... 

A poolside memory surfaces—me, Mia, and a boy laughing together in high school. I stop at a red light and force the memory to stop with it. Not the place, not the time. 

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"Cheers!"

The table full of staff and talent from today's variety show clink their glasses together in celebration to a great day's filming. Since Mia has a rest day of sorts tomorrow, we accepted the invitation to go drinking tonight. It’s her chance to network—and my chance to finally loosen up. The hangover the next morning is not necessarily a fun experience, but that's not something I'm thinking about right now as I down my second cup of beer.

"Hey! No getting ahead of me!" Mia says, lightly slapping my arm. She's only halfway through her first glass, but she's always been a lighter drinker than myself.

"President! Welcome down!" The producer greets Yoshida as he makes his way through the restaurant to our table. The first time I saw our president at a dinner party, I was pretty intimidated. But that's exactly why Yoshida goes to each event he can. He wants to be approachable, and not some corporate executive reigning over the company. 

"Sir, you're late!" I say more casually than intended. Am I slurring? I don't feel that drunk.

Yoshida chuckles and takes the empty seat next to Mia.

"How much have you had tonight, Satou-kun?" he asks, leaning on the table.

I start counting on my fingers and hold up my pinky and ring finger. Oh my god, I am drunk already. Have I eaten today? I should grab food...

"I see she's happy to be back with you, Watanabe-kun," he tells Mia while confiscating what would’ve been my third drink.

I was planning to drink that!

"Thank you for that," Mia tells him. She feeds me a toothpick skewer of edamame, making others at the table laugh.

"Look at that, the roles are reversed! Actress becomes the assistant," The show host says, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes. "You two seem close!"

"I should hope so!" Mia says. "Satou-san takes care of me every day! She deserves a break every now and then."

I lean against Mia’s shoulder and thank every god for her existence. It's not fair for Kubo to swoop in and try to take her away. Why must I struggle every day with that? And now he has this crazy idea that I'm so against the idea of them dating because I want to date her. Has he never heard of platonic love in his entire life?! I'm just trying to look out for my friend. After all, these are her wishes! She didn't have time for romance in high school, and that's not going to suddenly change now. And if it does, I'd be the first one to know...

I’d be the first to know… right?

I raise a hand to my face and feel wet lines streaming down my cheeks. Oh god, I'm crying. 

“Yoshida-san, don’t ever let that happen again!” What am I saying?!

"Sorry, Satou-kun. I understand." 

I'm in Mia's arms, and the company president is patting my head. What am I, a child?

"I can't believe he just did that! I wasn't prepared! And it was such a long day too!" Am I hiccupping? I need to eat. There's no way two beers should be doing this to me right now.

Mia holds a tissue to my nose and instructs me to blow. I follow her instructions, and nibble on more edamame while she goes to throw it away. On the other side of the table the others are laughing, most likely drunk themselves, but still trying to cheer me up even though they have no idea what I'm talking about. I hope none of us remember this in the morning.

Mia returns, holding a conversation with Yoshida. I can't make out what they're saying. Maybe work? Fujimoto? I still need to pick out those interns. They all look very skilled. Picking two out of the bunch is going to be a challenge. Agh! I can't think right now. More drinking. What happened to my glass? Oh, Yoshida took it. My edamame is gone too...

"Should we take her home?" Yoshida asks.

Home? But we just got here! Well, Yoshida just got here. There rest of us have been at it for a couple hours.

"Oh, that would be amazing if you're offering," Mia says. 

"Of course," Yoshida replies.

"Oh, but what about the company car?" she asks.

"I'll have someone pick it up in the morning."

Mia starts to help me to my feet, but Yoshida intervenes, allowing me to rest my bodyweight against his side while he supports my waist.

"Pardon my reach, Satou-kun. Are you ready to go?" he asks.

"Ready!" I say, waving sloppily to the rest of the table. "Bye byeee!" 

The trip home passes in soft, blurry flashes. I’m pretty sure Yoshida buckles me in, and Mia double-checks the seatbelt. She has that gentle, quiet mothering side—always has. Yoshida drives, and Mia sits in the passenger seat. They talk the whole time, but the words melt together into background noise. I drift in and out of consciousness, the steady motion of the car rocking me to sleep.