Trash

Welcome to Ruma mil central HQ! That's right, the rumor churnin' mill o' the worlds, right here in little ole Tokyo, THE Ruma mil central! Located in a lovely office suite inside my private penthouse, you can see the whole damn city from here. Me? They call me Bun. Bun cuz I'm hoppin' in n' out like a rabbit! Certainly not cuz of my childish looks. I only look like a brat cuz of some fucked up medical condition. I'm fucking 30, but nope, looks say I'm 10 so no drinking, voting, or anything adults can normally do, all cuz of my parents fucking up with me in the womb. The only benefit is my mind was born years beyond my age. I didn't have that, I'd be in some childcare center.

"Oi, Kasuga! Office!" I shouted into the intercom. 

Within seconds, in steps a big tit bimbo in a sleeveless black dress n' flats.  This here is my servant, Kasgua Gomi. Since I can't just go out on my own, she's gotta do all the labor work, sometimes even pose as my mother. The work? Getting shit for me like games, food, information, the necessities. See thanks to my condition, I can't go out by myself or get any honest job, so I'm stuck burning my eyes into a screen all day. Doing what? Simple, G-O-S-S-I-P!

This world is glued to the web, and anything that trends, dominates mass minds. And the piper of the press? Me. That means all ad revenue flows to me, but revenue's just the icing. Nothing tickles me more than exposing scandals, watching subjects squirm. Cuz when they squirm, they roll off the edge into an even bigger mud pit, and that's more clout for me!

"You called for me, ma'am?" Kasuga trembled.

"Called? No shit I called! We got ourselves some big leads thanks to you!"

"What do you mean?"

"That Hollywood star you saw the other day? We found him. And just look who he's munchin' with!" I smirked as I turned my screen around.

Subject Doe, the name I've assigned this guy. Clearly a foreigner as that hair don't look dyed, and close up of his face confirms his foreign origins. Problem is we don't know much about him other than that... until today! Seems a local denizen of clout chasing snapped a pic of this guy having lunch and getting close with one Chika Testsu. THE Chika Tetsu. That hat and shades can't fool me. I've made her the muse of my works how many times? Anyway, time for work.

"You get a good enough look?" I asked as I spun my screen back around.

"Yes, ma'am. I can confirm that is without a doubt the man I saw yesterday."

"Good. Now your job is obviously to do any digging on the physical front."

"What about your basic needs?" 

"You stocked me up, so it should be fine. Worse, I order delivery. Now if you know where to find this guy, get stalking." 

With a bow, Kasuga dawned her trench coat and vamoosed, leaving me in solitude. That means it's craftin' time. You might think it's easy to just go online and post "Hey, celeb a's makin' out with normie b", but any cunt can do that! This era's also headin' in a direction where AI can ruin shit and perspectives, meanin' you need to put in elbow grease if you want people to realize you're actually legit n' human.

First, the beginning draft. Yeah, I draft. Rule number 1 with posting is that you write your draft out elsewhere, cuz if you hit that upload button before everything's dandy, fucked. We'll start off as follows, "Breaking! Mysterious foreign VIP found flirting with famed seiyuu, Chika Tetsu! Lovers!? Family!? A new deal in the works!?"

And of course, that picture of Chika n' Doe for the cover image. And there's my post, all I need now is the actual article on my site I'll be linking folks to... 

^^^

My name is Gomi. Kasuga Gomi. I am but a mere servant in service to madam Bun. In her presence, I am to behave as quote, "submissively and kiss assy as she so demands". Buuut, when I'm out in the wild, I'm free to let it all loose! Like madam, I LOVE gossip! The thrill of stalking someone with the possibility of ruining their life, the infamy and fear you'll put everyone in at your sheer information gathering might, ahhh it makes me feel SO good!

I'm dumb as a rock when it comes to writing words, but taking pictures, stealing documents, and loosening lips? My body does the talking. I did gymnastics, yoga, parkour, even practiced magic tricks and pick pick pocketing along with piano to have the most finesse fingers around. With all this I could be a modern ninja- Wait, I AM a modern ninja! And as such, I did all the hard work yesterday when that foreigner first came. And that's how I know the hotel he's staying at. A shame I had to do other errands for madam this morning, but now that she's given the order, I'm free to stake out as much as I can. Now, lets try and find out more about you, Subject Doe.

Reaching the hotel, I took a seat in the lobby and pretended to read my phone. I do have to be careful since I'm not a registered guest here. Since this is my first time here, I have the benefit of the doubt, but for multiple excursions, I'll need to either book a room or nail the perfect excuse. I have some in mind, but the top one is only good if I fulfill a certain criteria. And just as I was thinking that, in came Subject Doe.

He looked exhausted, but through the limits of my vision, I saw him oogling me up. Could he be on to me? Never. Tis my first time showing myself fully before him. He'd never suspect a thing this early. No, wait, I was the one that approached him when he first arrived... Nah, I was wearing a different outfit. 

Getting up, I approached the elevator and smirked. 6th floor. I'm so glad this hotel's elevator tells you what floor it's on from the call panel. Now, to go forth and report to Madam...