The Reason

“I had no choice but to leave you back then…”

The voice—so hauntingly familiar—whispered directly into Ailine’s ears, making her heart skip a beat.

“Eh? O-Owen?”

Impossible. The cold, distant ex who once treated her like a stranger was standing right before her. And now… he had removed the surgical mask that made him unapproachable, revealing that calm, mesmerizing face she had remembered.

Her head throbbed. Was this real? Or just another fever-induced hallucination? His voice was too real, too tangible… yet her body burned as if rejecting her rational mind.

“I must be running another fever to hallucinate this,” she muttered, trying to convince herself.

“Do you think so?”

“Yes, of course. There’s no way you could speak to me so warmly like this. You’re usually formal, professional… untouchable.”

Ailine pressed her fingers against her forehead. It was warm, uncomfortably so.

“Do you want me to help?” Owen asked, his voice calm, almost teasing.

Before she could answer, his hand was already on her forehead.

Ailine reflexively caught his hand, frowning.

“Impossible… impossible… yet you feel so real. Could it be… that I miss you so much, my hallucination reached this level?”

Owen’s lips curved into a faint, almost tender smile. She hadn’t changed much since high school—still sharp, still emotional, still breathtakingly innocent in her way.

“Missing me that much, huh?” he murmured, his voice low, intimate.

“Don’t underestimate me! You don’t know anything about my feelings, Owen!”

“I didn’t mean that. I… I’m just glad you feel that way about me.”

“Just glad?” Ailine bit her lip, frustration flickering in her eyes. “Only that?”

“What else do you want me to do?”

“What are you even talking about, huh?” Ailine raised her voice, oblivious to the fact that Julian was still asleep on the other side of the room. To her, this was a dream—a feverish, maddening dream.

“…“ Owen said nothing.

“You… you’re outrageous! You knew how I felt! You knew how much I loved you! And yet…” Her voice broke, breath catching. “We were fine… we were happy… so romantic… so perfect. But why did you suddenly end it? Why did you leave without a word? Why… why did you disappear? Why, Owen? Why?”

Her emotions surged, like a storm ripping through her chest. Each word was a dagger, slicing through the years of silent pain she had carried.

Then, when the lean but firm man hugged her, it hurt even more. Tears poured freely, tracing paths down her pale cheeks.

“…“

“You’re the cruelest man in the world!”

Ailine lightly but repeatedly hit him as he held her, helplessly.

“I know…”

“The meanest man alive!”

“Yes, I know that too…”

“You bastard! You’re insane, stressed, unhinged, outrageous!”

“Hn…” Owen accepted all her scolding silently, letting the words fall onto him like raindrops on stone.

Ailine’s energy waned. Her emotions drained every ounce of strength she had left, leaving her incapable of hitting him again.

“Damn… I still hope for a man as cruel as you… Hiks…” she whispered, voice breaking.

Owen didn’t look at her. He merely held her closer, letting her words, soft as they were, sink into him.

He wanted to be selfish just this once. To linger in this embrace, feeling her warmth, feeling her vulnerability.

Yet, the sound of her soft crying gnawed at him, discomforting, piercing.

Finally, her fragile hands gently pushed him back, releasing him from the selfishness he had indulged in.

She tried to wipe her own tears, hands trembling. Owen thought silently—was this what she had been doing all this time?

Her body, her heart… so delicate, so fragile. And when he reached to help, she refused.

“Don’t try to fix my heart again if you still intend to act cold toward me in the future!”

“I was just… doing what a doctor would normally do.”

“Am I so unfamiliar to you that you treat me like any other patient? I don’t want to be treated that way!”

“Is this a tantrum?”

“Tch, I’m not joking!” Ailine snapped, voice raw, laced with both anger and sorrow.

“Don’t be mad…”

“Don’t be mad?” Ailine’s eyes widened, disbelief etched across her features. “You actually ask me not to be mad? For an ex who left without a word, that’s outrageous! You should understand my anger! Be grateful I didn’t punch your annoying face!”

“I allow you to punch my annoying face…”

“What the…” she gawked.

“My mistakes in the past… are indeed unforgivable from your perspective.”

“Rather than hitting you, I want to hear your explanation, Owen! Please… explain why you left me? You trapped my heart for so long, Owen!”

Owen lowered his head. Silence hung between them.

“You won’t explain? Over ten years, and you’re still unwilling to tell me? Owen… you’re cruel.”

“A situation I couldn’t control, Ailine…”

“I don’t understand. I really don’t understand, Owen! What kind of situation couldn’t you control? You and I… we liked each other. We loved each other. Our relationship was sweet… so private… so precious. We protected it because you were the school star. We were happy every day—even if we had to hide it!”

The past always triggered Ailine’s dramatic side. Especially matters she had been waiting years to understand.

And yet, Owen stayed silent.

Ailine exhaled sharply, trying to calm herself. “Owen, this is my dream… let me hear… even if you lie…” Her voice was a soft whisper, yet her heart raced. “It’s better than your silence.”

Owen leaned closer, face serious, voice low yet unwavering. “Back then… when I suddenly asked to break up and transferred schools… it wasn’t because I didn’t love you. I loved you, Ai… more than I could ever say.”

Ailine knew he spoke the truth. Owen had even been the one to ask her out first.

She lowered her gaze, lips trembling. “But… why didn’t you tell me? I could have waited. Distance wouldn’t matter… LDR wouldn’t matter… I could have handled it, Owen…”

Owen shook his head, eyes filled with honesty and regret. “It was… more than just distance. There were things I couldn’t tell back then.”

“Why? Was I not worthy to lean on?”

Shaking his head, he replied, “It wasn’t something teenage kids like us could handle.”

“Family issues?” she guessed.

“Yes, basically.”

“Not approved? I wasn’t good enough for you, the genius? Not pretty enough? Not good enough? I could have changed!”

“It wasn’t that simple…” he said, smiling bitterly.

Ailine, naïve as ever, waited.

“So?”

“A storm hit my family unexpectedly… I thought distancing myself was the only way to protect you. I didn’t want you to suffer the things I feared would destroy you.”

Tears flowed again, despite her efforts to stop them. “I… still want to be with you, Owen. Even if I have to wait… even if I have to endure the pain of longing…”

Owen lowered his head, staring at her long and deeply. Guilt, resolve, and a love he couldn’t fully express clouded his eyes. “Forgive me… I chose to leave. I didn’t want your heart to hurt more. I thought… this was best. You have to believe me, even if it sounds cruel…”

He slowly stepped toward the door. Ailine watched, as if she wanted to scream, to hold him, to hold all the pain… but she could only whisper softly:

“I… still love you… Owen…”

Her words dissolved into the heavy breaths, her fever consuming her body.

---

On the other side, Julian lay awake.

He couldn’t sleep, eyes wide, listening to the faint conversation. Every word from Owen—though, to Ailine, it was only a fever dream—revealed the secret that had made her cry endlessly.

He held his breath, heart pounding. Slowly, the truth sank in: the ex who had shaken Ailine so profoundly… was Owen.

He wanted to run, to check if she was okay, but he knew… not now. He had to stay silent. Witness the deeper, more painful, more complex story unfolding before him.

Julian pulled the blanket tight around his chest, staring at Ailine, her tears barely held back. Tonight, he realized… the love that had quietly endured over ten years was no small thing. Ailine’s love for Owen… so pure, so deep, so indelible…

And himself?

“How much more must I fight to compete with Owen, who holds her heart like this? I guess I lost from the very start…”

He closed his eyes, trying to push away the slow, creeping ache in his chest.