Bend the World

It was hard for him to know which part shocked him more. Even expecting the answer did little to dull the impact. The only relief was knowing that he wasn’t actually dead, but waiting for them at the end. He hated that it had come down to that mindset. Everything they attempted to do outside of Aya’s view was to save their friends from the unnecessary pain of death. Fake or not, it felt real and while Yuki had no memory of any of the deaths that he had been dealt the others did leave him to only imagine.

Unfortunately, they knew Yori had the highest risk due to his position. Someone cutthroat as Aya would be nearly impossible to stop. He could only hope that his death would be the only one that they would face in this world. As the last one, an end in sight was their only solace.

Forcing himself to move, Yuki moved to the entrance of the tent looking back at Saki. It felt callous to just leave his friend alone, but Yumi remained unaccounted for and possibly in equal pain. ‘I wish there was something I could say, but silent company is all I can provide her right now. I need to know how Yumi is. Wish I had my powers so I could be in two places at once…’ With one last look at Saki, he marched out the tent returning to his search.

Chapter 538 – Bend the World

Was it this era? Was it the world? Had it been there in her mind the whole time? Was this truly a part of her? Could it just be an extreme version of something from within her? Years to ponder it and yet she mostly tried to ignore it. In general, it wasn’t something from her, at least within her own personal theory. Might have come from her mind, these personalities, but they were a by-product of the power that Yuki granted her when he changed Japan.

She might have understood Masa and Sumiko enough to clear their trials, but not once did she feel like they came from something within her, at least in a meaningful way. A sci-fi setting with the fate of humanity at stake, she couldn’t even say that was something that interested her. And Masa’s world looked to be more inspired by something that would excite Yuki not her.

No, Yumi couldn’t find connections to them and refused to believe that this was somehow a part of her. She knew what the objective was, going through two worlds made that clear enough. Hence why she found herself sitting alone in the dark staring out at the city they conquered. An odd feeling to say such things, even if it might have been a normal phrase within this world.

To her back, she tried to ignore the celebration of the brief campaign that they ran against Komagata. Had it been anyone else other than Aya, Yumi could see it being a year or two long campaign. With the right intelligence, maybe it would have been possible to do it in half that time, but she was a genius though hardly a surprise given the past two. This time she did have the benefit of Seiji and Nerine being on their side from within. Seiji definitely could have pushed harder if he wanted to and possibly had it not been Yuki that he was going up against, that might have happened. Even in this world, Seiji was the closest to a one man army.

“Finally found you!” called out Yuki, who’s voice managed to drill into her mind with effortless ease and break her out of her thoughts.

She turned around from her seat on a supply crate to face him. In the dim light, she could see a little bit of sweat along his cheek likely from all of the running about. “That was the intent.”

“Yes, you also knew I’d find you eventually.”

“I expected that. Do you feel at ease now that you found me?”

“Somewhat, but something’s troubling you. You going to just tell me what’s going on or will have I have to spend the next hour working it out of you?”

A sigh came from her lips looking at Yuki. ‘No, he’s right…eventually he’ll get it out of me. This is my problem…’ It was meant to be a test for her, all of it. She felt like it was falling, always falling back to her friends.

He came over and grabbed up a covered crate of something and set it down in front of her. The sigh had likely already been the signal to him that she sent up the white flag. “So what’s going on? This isn’t about your brother like the others think.”

“I guess that would be the natural conclusion that they would arrive at. But no, you’re right. Though that does bother me as well. I at least know he’s still alive. If anything, he gets to skip things now especially with how many years we’ve been at this.” Death almost seemed like the fast way out with the way the world worked. Not that was an option for her.

Yuki leaned in towards Yumi so that she didn’t feel the need to be loud with her words. “Something to do with Aya then?”

“She told us, me, that these only get harder. I treated that pretty casually when she did. I had solved the past two and dealt with a time looping sanity crushing timeline. In fact, I might have actually gone insane there at some point. You know I can’t even remember most of the months we were there. It could have been years, I haven’t a clue anymore. Maybe I am insane still.”

“You’re not.”

“Probably…it’s just…I can’t believe I actually want to go back to that world. At least there, things were civilized and we weren’t trying to just kill each other.” A small self defeating laugh came from her. “Which is hilarious coming from someone that’s got so much blood on her hands already.” Yuki reached out his hand for Yumi, but she pulled back. “I’m not looking for pity right now.”

Standing up from the crate and walking out towards the small ridge, she stared down at the dark dimly moonlit fields stained with the blood of their war and conquest. A reminder of her fears stared back. “I’m not sure I’m going to be able to clear this one.”

Yuki shifted around looking at Yumi’s back. This sort of doubt wasn’t the first time that he saw it in her. Though there was definitely something different about it this time than before that made him want to just see it as some passing fears. “What has you so certain? Each world has been tough, but you’ve succeeded each time before.”

“But I didn’t have to sacrifice myself. I didn’t have to give up my humanity.” The piercing stare from Yuki burned at her back. She knew that he wanted to say more, but held on her account. “I’ve been through two of them and I understand more or less how they work now. In the end, I’m supposed to do something that brings their souls to peace, but also reach their heights so that they can acknowledge me as their equals. I couldn’t bring them peace any other way. These are extreme people, peerless and alone and in the end, they have trouble seeing anyone else the same and letting someone in.

“Aya’s different though. With Masa I could train and get stronger and Sumiko I could learn. But Aya’s cold, calculating and without mercy. I watched her today cut down my brother with little concern for his life even though she had known him. She planned the assassination of every one of those Lords and their families as though she was picking toppings for a sandwich. Human life is meaningless to her, everyone’s just pieces and a point value in her mind. The world’s a game and she’s the master controlling it all.

“If it were just the command and tactics, I can reach that with determination, but it goes against my very core the way she treats everyone. If I have to become that empty and devoid of life, then I can’t do it.” She turned around looking at Yuki. “We’re going to die here. I can’t beat that!” It was easy to forget at times for her, but even with it all focused on her there was more than just herself that suffered. If only she remained trapped within the world, she felt like she could live with that. But she couldn’t let it happen.

He could see how much different this was from other times that she found herself doubting. ‘This is so much worse for her… she’s really scared. It’s not just a matter of being at the end of her rope or a frustration. There is real fear that to win she’ll have to kill who she is and that’s a bridge too far for her…Yumi…’ His eyes closed, focusing on words for Yumi. It wasn’t so simple as just giving some encouragement or pushing her forward.

Like Yumi knew, they had to keep going forward and that terrified her. Seeing firsthand how Aya was, something that the rest of them knew more clearly finally hit Yumi. ‘Perhaps going to the frontlines wasn’t the best idea, but it’s not like we could have said anything to Aya anyway. This was going to happen. Yumi being within the court most of her life didn’t see the worst this world had to offer and honestly, she still hasn’t…’

Yuki spun around his mind still trying to rationalize things while searching for something that could be useful to Yumi. It was a dilemma that he understood all too well. Recent events in the real world forced him to confront very similar matters. But he couldn’t give her his answer. Truthfully, she had to find the answer herself, because it would be something that had to fit to her own sense of morals whatever that might be.

Crossing his arms, he arrived at the best possible answer that he could give. “You don’t have to be Aya to still reach her equal.”

“I considered that, but is she really going to see any worth or value from someone that’s still attached to human morality?”

“She recognized the rest of us.”

“As something she can use, but not at equals. She’s seeking an equal like the others and that’s not going to come from deeds, but from her own opinion.”

“But deeds can form opinion. Do you feel confident that you could be her match while keeping your morals intact?”

“Yes.”

“Then there’s your answer. Don’t bend to the world, make the world bend to you. That’s what Aya did.”

“Bend the world…” She had to admit that she hadn’t thought about it like that. Being so focused on what Aya was doing and trying to match her play for play didn’t give her a larger perspective. ‘Maybe that was the answer…the woman values people of worth and what is useful to her own goals. If I can be someone that can achieve what she can’t then that would be of worth to her. Maybe she would find me an equal…’

For a woman that sees the world a plaything doing such a thing would be a difficult and nearly impossible task. Reflecting back on the past, she felt that way about the others as well and she cleared their trials. So it should be possible.

Be possible…

That was the first the whole day that such a word came to Yumi and it felt like a genuine possibility. Looking across the bloodstained grounds no longer felt like her path. Even if the path that she wanted remained obscured for the time being, it felt like she had been given an axe to cut a way through.

She turned back towards Yuki with renewed vigor in her eyes. A restored confidence cleared her mind and brought her back. Things would have to be different from now on, she knew. However, like Yuki said she had to bend the world. Making Aya see who she could be, who she was had to be the only thing on her mind, but done her way. Aya bent everyone else to submit before her. Yuki was right. She thought about it wrong. If she did it Aya’s way, she would just be bending to Aya like everyone else. Resisting Aya and still succeeding, that would be the way that she could finally meet her on the bridge together.

A nod in self agreement to the plan that already started to form. “I know exactly what we have to do. Though I’m not certain how Aya will feel about it. It’s bold and possibly a little too bold this early…”