Bat Fu Hustle

“Wada, you know, didn’t expect a doctor’s visit from you.”

“I would be an asshole if that were the case. I’m still bitter about your bullying, but that doesn’t mean I’ll stoop as low.”

“Motherfucker, I’ll wreck your ass right now!”

“Tanimura, Wada, stop, or I’ll stab both of you with a sedative! Others are sleeping!”

“Yes, Mikado-sensei…”

The two of them clammed up as the school nurse brandished a horse of a syringe, the needle looking thick enough to stab bone. They knew better than to fight in the face of someone so reputable. Not to mention, ruthlessly efficient at first aid. Not long ago, she had held down a giant kendo student with a single arm, pulling out a tranquilizer to sedate him with the other hand. Within moments, he stiffened and went out cold.

After a few awkward moments, Akio finally spoke his mind again.

“Why the hell did you come to save my ass anyway? Thought you’d be the first one to cheer it getting beaten.”

“It didn’t sit right with me.”

“Come again?”

“All this time, you’ve been rocking it out with Haibara, tearing shit up, and here I am, doing nothing but calling you a loser. It left a bad taste in my mouth.”

Akio scratched his head, trying to make sense of the confession.

“You know, you could have just stopped? Though, I guess you pretty much avoided me since I laid into you with my fist.”

“Should’ve. The team ghosted me for a bit after that. I had to work my way back up to the starting lineup.”

“Woo! Tanimura training arc, how about that?”

“If you were gonna step up against a monster like Haibara, then it’d look bad if I couldn’t just git gud myself. We’re going for Nationals this year. We have the goods to make the rival schools weep.”

“Tanimura, the tsundere. Imagine that.”

“BITCH,” Tanimura sat up to grab Akio by the shirt, who simply chuckled at his response. Slowly, he let go and laid back down. “Dammit, Wada. This is why people give you shit, that mouth of yours.”

“Don’t I know it. I’m screwed no matter what I do anyways. But at some point, I just decided to take my chances and stop worrying. Misaki doesn’t give me the luxury to do that, so why bother.”

“You’re going to die early at this rate.”

“Don’t I know it… let’s forget about that, did you ever make up with that girlfriend of yours?”

“Eh, Kanako?”

Akio shrugged, not knowing her name to begin with.

“Naw, she wouldn’t even look at me after I got in that scrap with you. Got in bed with some ace from the tennis club, and then, dumped him for some prodigy in kendo.”

“Damn, looks are deceiving. Didn’t strike me as a girl gunning for thick shafts.”

Tanimura snorted at his joke. He stopped himself from laughing, whether it was because he didn’t want Akio the benefit of the satisfaction or something else.

“You’re one to talk, Wada. I heard you yelling about thicc ass thighs.”

Akio turned pale. He had completely forgotten about that moment. He had basically declared his fetish out in the open. He felt a hand on his shoulder.

“You do you, man. If it keeps Haibara in check, then it earns you a bit of respect. I couldn’t never come out and say it, but it takes balls to date crazy.”

Akio felt a bit weird by all of this talk. He pushed aside the hand, looking Tanimura in the eyes.

“So, then we good here? No more bad air between us?”

“Yeah, good.”

“Good.”

They traded ‘good’ back and forth a few more times, just for good measure. And then, they both cracked up.

If only they had met on such terms instead of what the first two weeks had given Akio, then life wouldn’t have taken such a dramatic turn. But then, he probably wouldn’t have fallen so hard for Misaki. And he wouldn’t have stopped giving a damn about his issues.

“I’d rather give you shit for all the bad things that happened, than to just brush it all off and ignore things.”

Though Akio said it aloud, part of it was confirmation that being with Misaki was the right choice. Now that he had gotten through the initial wave, it was time to push forward.

The curtain pulled back at that moment, revealing Kitsune, who had been listening the whole time.

“Excellent. We need all the wins we can take at this time. There’s still the matter of beating the street gangs on their turf and winning your dear street queen back. To do that, we have to capitalize on the allies we have. You sir, are going to help us.”

v

A normally sleepy Sunday morning started off with heavy clangs marching down the streets of Yokohama. A large group with face masks and metallic bats paraded through the shady parts of town, a rare sight as they were heading right into gang territory.

Akio Wada stood at the head of the formation, the only one showing his face. His eyes darted all around, waiting for trouble to come finding them. He thought back to his conversation with Kitsune.

“From my investigation, it appears that the Haibara Family slipped some funds to two major gangs situated in the area – the Blue Devils and the Yokohama Reds.” Kitsune brandished a notepad displaying the biker emblems of the two groups, but Akio couldn’t care less.

“Yokohama Reds… wait, I think I beat up some of their members before.”

“Yup, at the batting cage. Your girlfriend rubbed egg on the leader’s face, so they’re out for revenge from that time.”

“Ah, Mr. Pissed His Pants. Guess I don’t have Misaki around to scare him, but I don’t recall him being that tough. I’m not losing a fight to someone with bad hair.”

Kitsune winked at him.

“Tough, probably not so much. But he does have a lot of followers that dig the hairstyle. Call it niche, but they are quite fervent about it. Besides, you have to also contend with the Blue Devils joining in as well. When rival gangs shake hands for a mutual goal, that’s when you have to be careful.”

“All I really need to do is beat up both leaders, and then, claim the crown. Just need a way to draw them out for a confrontation. Preferably, a one-on-one.”

Akio didn’t know the first thing about dealing with the gangs. He specialized in trying to avoid them, not the opposite. However, Kitsune grinned proudly at his hesitation.

“Keep following the plan, and we’ll make that happen! The thrashing that Shiomizu’s students gave them was a heavy blow. That puts them on the spot, makes them look weak. It’ll be up to the leader to pick up the slack then.”

“Okay, what do you suggest?”

“Putting on a show to mess with them in their own backyard.”

It was for that reason Akio was now marching down the main street that divided the territory between the Yokohama Reds and Blue Devils. Nothing said ‘up yours’ more than shamelessly brandishing a bat in public while marching with a ton of students that had volunteered to play along with this charade to get back at the attempted invasion.

Akio glanced to his side, where Tanimura stayed in step next to him.

“I can’t believe you’re going along with this.”

“Can it, Wada. It’s my way of paying you back for all the bullying. If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t have half the crowd.”

Before Tanimura’s downfall, he held a significant influence on the student body. The whole school got in on Akio’s poor treatment as a result. So when Tanimura fessed up and wanted to make amends, quite a few people also felt guilty and joined in. A little bit of help lighting the school spirit from Kitsune did the rest.

However, that wasn’t why Akio was shaking his head. As they approached the designated spot for their planned confrontation, he drew a deep breath to prepare himself.

Upon stepping into the crossings of Kannai Station, several boomboxes erupted with technopop, signaling everyone to move in formation.

Akio took his bat in hand and started off with a pose, pointing forward along with everyone else. And then, he began to dance.

He spun around, waving the bat side to side, doing the floss with it – and everyone was right there with him. A group of a hundred strong strutted their stuff in sync like a dance troupe, the music blaring across the streets to get the attention of all those around.

As silly as it all seemed, Akio was making a statement.

I rule this town. This is my victory dance. Come stop me if you can.

After the first few seconds of self-cringe, Akio found himself getting strangely into it. Maybe, it was because so many people were on his side, doing the same thing. Even the worst decisions that he could make felt alright, if others were there to struggle with him.

Just as the first song ended, the roar of motorbikes spoke of extra company. Akio looked ahead to see the familiar pompadour and red leather jacket of the Yokohama Reds leader.

On the other side of the street, a stocky guy with a mean grin and bald head hopped off his bike. He slung a blue overcoat on his shoulder, making it clear that he was leader of the Blue Devils.

“Wait… is he wearing horns?”

If Akio squinted, he could just make out a pair of cartoonish devil horns on his head. He turned to Kitsune on his other side for the deets.

“They’re a gift from his little sister. When he was deciding what to name his gang, she grabbed that from her closet and put it on his head. Now, he won’t do business without them.”

“Damn, mad respect… unless…”

“Nil on the creeping. He’s just a devoted big brother.”

“Well, there goes my reason for decking him in the face.”

“I think you have something else to worry about, rather than that.” Kitsune pointed straight down the road, where a large, cloaked figure loomed in the distance. “Looks like that’s the big boss there. Pulling the strings.”

As if Kitsune was heard, the figure pointed to both leaders, signaling them to come forward. Akio sighed as he cracked his knuckles, hoping that a two-on-one wouldn’t be as much of a pain as he expected.

But then, he felt a tug on both shoulders. He looked back to see Kitsune and Tanimura holding him back.

“Hold on there, Wada.”

“This situation calls for a captain battle, not for the main guys to clash. Save it for Mr. Ominous in the middle.”

“Captain battle?” Akio looked at them, confused.

“Trust in your ‘followers’ to head out first, maybe soften them up a little even if they can’t do the job.” Kitsune grinned.

“But, wait. You can fight?”

Akio eyed his sorta friend with skepticism. He wasn’t sure what to think with Kitsune offering to take blows in his stead, but the look on his wily face showed no hint of defeat.

“Alright, show me what you got, War General.”

Akio looked over to Tanimura.

“You’re doing this too?”

“Oh hell, yeah. My blood’s still boiling from yesterday. Need to let off some more steam before I decide to wreck you instead.”

He nodded to both of them, letting them walk forward. Now, there was one question that remained in all this.

How the heck will it not devolve into chaos if one side decides that the odds aren’t in their favor and wants to help?

Fortunately, Akio got a strange answer to this question moments later, when a lone figure in a mask walked forward from the crowd he was in. His jaw dropped for a moment at how obvious she was being.

“Y-Yuunagi?!”

Hearing this, she turned back towards him and yelled.

“I am not Yuunagi. I am the Masked Judge! Anyone that dares to interrupt these fights will deal with me!”

No one in the crowds was fooled. Not the Shiomizu students who knew their disciplinary head well. Not the gang members who had seen her dominate their members yesterday. Somehow, Yuunagi was alone in thinking her disguise was necessary.

“Right… Well then. Kitsune, Tanimura, kick their asses until I can’t tell if they’re red or blue.”

“Roger, Commander!”