When Dreams Diverge

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January brought cold winds and the weight of reality.
The entrance exams were six weeks away. Applications were due in two weeks. And suddenly, the abstract concept of "different universities" became concrete and terrifying.
Airi sat in the career counselor's office, staring at the forms spread across the desk. Tokyo University was her first choice—always had been. But now, looking at the application, she felt a twist of something that might have been doubt.
"Sato-san, you seem distracted," Ms. Yamamoto, the counselor, observed. "Is something wrong?"
"No, I just... Tokyo feels very far away suddenly."
"From home?"
"From..." Airi trailed off. She couldn't exactly say "from my boyfriend" without sounding like she was making decisions based on a relationship rather than her future.
But Ms. Yamamoto's expression was understanding. "From Kurosawa-kun?"
Airi's head snapped up. "How did you—"
"I'm a counselor. It's my job to notice these things." She smiled gently. "And you two aren't exactly subtle."
"I'm not going to change my plans because of him," Airi said quickly. "I want Tokyo University. I want their psychology program. That's my dream."
"I believe you. But it's okay to acknowledge that achieving your dream comes with a cost."
"Four hours by train. Four years of distance." Airi looked down at her hands. "Everyone says we won't make it."
"What do you say?"
"I say we will. We have to."
Ms. Yamamoto was quiet for a moment. Then: "My husband and I did long-distance for three years. Different medical schools. It was the hardest thing we'd ever done."
"But you made it?"
"We made it. But I won't lie to you—it cost us. Missed birthdays. Holidays alone. Times when we needed each other and couldn't be there." She met Airi's eyes. "You need to go into this with clear eyes. Love isn't always enough. It takes work, sacrifice, and both people choosing it every single day."
"We're ready for that."
"Are you? Because in my experience, most high school couples think they're ready. But when reality hits—when you're exhausted from studying and lonely and someone else is right there offering comfort—that's when you learn if you're actually ready."
The words settled over Airi like ice water. She'd been so focused on the romantic promise of making it work that she hadn't truly considered the practical reality.
What if they weren't ready? What if they were just naive kids playing at forever?
---
## 📚 Ren's Counseling Session
That afternoon, Ren sat in the same chair, facing the same counselor with a very different energy.
"Kyoto University," Ms. Yamamoto said, looking at his application. "Excellent choice. Their veterinary program is one of the best."
"Yeah. It's perfect for what I want to do."
"And Sato-san is applying to Tokyo University."
Ren's jaw tightened. "Yes."
"Four hours apart."
"I'm aware."
"Kurosawa-kun, I'm not trying to discourage you. I just want you to think realistically about what that means."
"I have thought about it. Every day. Every night. I think about nothing else." Ren leaned forward, intensity radiating from him. "I know it's going to be hard. I know people think we're stupid kids who don't understand what we're getting into. But I love her. And I'm not giving up on that."
"No one's asking you to give up. I'm asking if you've considered alternatives. There are good veterinary programs closer to Tokyo. Not as prestigious as Kyoto, but solid."
"Are you suggesting I give up my dream for a relationship?"
"I'm suggesting you consider what you value most."
"I value both. And I'm not choosing between them."
"Sometimes life makes you choose."
"Then I'll figure it out. We'll figure it out." Ren stood up. "Is there anything else? I have practice exams."
Ms. Yamamoto sighed. "Just... talk to each other. Really talk. About expectations, fears, what happens if one of you meets someone else. The difficult conversations you've been avoiding."
"We don't avoid difficult conversations."
"Don't you?"
The question haunted Ren as he left the office.
---
## 💔 The Crack
They met on the rooftop after school, their usual meeting place. But today it felt different. Heavier.
"How was counseling?" Airi asked.
"Fine. Yours?"
"Fine."
They sat in silence, both staring at the horizon. Finally, Ren spoke.
"Yamamoto-sensei suggested I apply to schools closer to Tokyo."
Airi's head whipped toward him. "What?"
"She said there are good veterinary programs that would make the distance easier."
"And what did you say?"
"I said no. Obviously." He looked at her. "But she made me think. About whether I'm being selfish. Choosing Kyoto when it makes things harder for us."
"You're not being selfish. Kyoto is your dream."
"So is Tokyo yours. But maybe..." He ran his hand through his hair in frustration. "Maybe one of us should compromise. Choose something closer."
"Who? Me or you?"
"I don't know. I just—" He stood up, pacing. "She said most high school couples don't make it through long-distance. That we're being naive."
"So you're giving up on us?"
"No! That's not what I—" He turned to face her. "I'm trying to be realistic, Airi. Trying to figure out how we actually do this instead of just hoping love is enough."
"Love is enough. We said that. We promised."
"We promised a lot of things during the festival. But that was romantic and perfect and not real life." His voice rose, frustration bleeding through. "Real life is going to be hard. Harder than we think. And I'm terrified that we're walking into this blind."
Airi stood up, anger flashing. "So what are you saying? That we should break up now? Save ourselves the trouble?"
"No! God, no. I'm saying—" He grabbed her shoulders. "I'm saying I'm scared. Terrified. That distance will break us. That I'll lose you. That I'm not strong enough to do this."
"Then why are you even considering other schools?"
"Because losing my dream is easier than losing you!"
The words hung in the air between them, raw and painful.
Airi's eyes filled with tears. "You can't say things like that."
"Why not? It's true." His voice cracked. "You're more important than Kyoto. Than veterinary school. Than anything."
"But you can't sacrifice your dream for me. I won't let you."
"And I won't let you do long-distance alone, wondering if I chose my career over you." He pulled her close, desperate. "I don't know what to do, Airi. I don't know how to choose."
"You shouldn't have to choose."
"But someone has to compromise. Someone has to give something up. Otherwise we're both just stubbornly pursuing our dreams while our relationship falls apart."
Airi pulled away from him. "Is that what you think will happen? We fall apart?"
"I think it's possible. And that scares me more than anything."
"So you want to give up before we even try?"
"That's not what I'm saying!"
"Then what are you saying, Ren? Because right now it sounds like you don't believe in us."
"I believe in us. But I also believe in being realistic."
"Realistic is just another word for giving up."
"That's not fair—"
"None of this is fair!" Airi's voice broke. "You think I'm not scared too? You think I haven't thought about all the ways this could go wrong? But I chose to have faith anyway. Faith in us. In our love."
"Faith isn't enough."
"Then what is?"
Ren had no answer. They stared at each other, both breathing hard, both on the edge of tears.
Finally, Airi said quietly, "Maybe Yamamoto-sensei is right. Maybe we need to have the difficult conversations we've been avoiding."
"Like what?"
"Like what happens if one of us meets someone else. What happens if the distance is too hard. What happens if we realize we made a mistake."
"I could never—"
"You don't know that. Neither of us do." She wiped her eyes angrily. "Four years is a long time. We'll be different people by then. Maybe people who don't fit together anymore."
"Don't say that."
"Why not? You're thinking it. I can see it on your face."
"I'm not thinking that. I'm thinking that I'm terrified of losing you and I don't know how to fix it."
"Maybe you can't fix it. Maybe nobody can." Airi picked up her bag. "I need to go. I can't do this right now."
"Airi, wait—"
"I'll text you later."
She left before he could stop her, leaving Ren alone on the rooftop with the dying light and the weight of everything unsaid.
---
## 🏠 Separate Corners
That night, neither of them texted.
Airi lay in bed, staring at her phone, waiting for Ren's name to appear. But it stayed dark.
She thought about Ms. Yamamoto's words. About cost and sacrifice. About whether they were really ready for this.
Maybe they weren't. Maybe they were just kids playing at forever, not understanding what forever actually meant.
Her phone buzzed. Not Ren—Miki.
**Miki**: *heard you and ren fought. you ok?*
**Airi**: *How did you hear already?*
**Miki**: *takeshi saw you guys on the roof. said it looked intense*
**Airi**: *We didn't fight. We just... talked.*
**Miki**: *about the distance?*
**Airi**: *Yeah.*
**Miki**: *its scary huh*
**Airi**: *Terrifying.*
**Miki**: *for what its worth, i think you guys will make it*
**Airi**: *Everyone keeps saying we won't.*
**Miki**: *yeah but everyone else doesn't know you two like i do*
**Miki**: *youre both stubborn as hell. youll make it work out of pure spite*
Despite everything, Airi smiled slightly.
**Airi**: *Maybe.*
**Miki**: *talk to him tomorrow. when youre both calmer*
**Airi**: *What if he's right? What if we're being naive?*
**Miki**: *then youre naive together. but at least youre trying*
**Miki**: *thats more than most people can say*
---
Meanwhile, across town, Ren sat on his balcony despite the cold, phone in hand, thumb hovering over Airi's name.
He'd typed and deleted ten messages. Nothing felt right. Nothing captured the mess of feelings churning inside him.
He wasn't giving up. He'd never give up on them. But he was scared in a way he'd never been scared before.
What if the counselor was right? What if they weren't ready?
What if loving each other wasn't enough?
His phone buzzed. His mom, calling from her night shift.
"Hey, Mom."
"Hey, baby. You sound terrible. What's wrong?"
And suddenly, Ren was crying. Actually crying, something he rarely did even with Airi.
"I think I messed up. With Airi. We fought about the distance and I said stupid things and now she's not texting me and I don't know what to do."
"What did you fight about specifically?"
"Whether we're being realistic about long-distance. Whether one of us should compromise and choose a different school."
His mom was quiet for a moment. "Can I tell you something?"
"Yeah."
"Your father and I never compromised. Never talked about hard things. We just assumed love would be enough and when it wasn't, we fell apart." Her voice was gentle. "The fact that you're having this fight—that you're facing these fears together—that's a good thing. It means you're taking this seriously."
"It doesn't feel good."
"Growth never does. But running from hard conversations doesn't make relationships stronger. It makes them brittle." She paused. "Do you love her?"
"More than anything."
"Then fight for her. Not with her—for her. For your future together. Have the scary conversations. Figure it out together."
"What if we can't figure it out?"
"Then at least you tried. But Ren? I don't think you'll fail. You're stronger than your father. And Airi is stronger than you know. You'll figure it out."
After hanging up, Ren stared at his phone for a long moment. Then he started typing.
**Ren**: *im sorry*
**Ren**: *im sorry for making you doubt us. for saying stupid things. for being scared and taking it out on you*
**Ren**: *youre right. we need to have faith. and i do. i have faith in us*
**Ren**: *can we talk tomorrow? please?*
Three dots appeared. Disappeared. Appeared again.
**Airi**: *I'm sorry too. For running away instead of talking.*
**Airi**: *Tomorrow. After school. Our rooftop?*
**Ren**: *our rooftop. always*
**Airi**: *I love you. Even when I'm scared.*
**Ren**: *i love you too. especially when youre scared*
**Ren**: *because that means you care enough to be scared*
**Airi**: *Goodnight, Ren.*
**Ren**: *goodnight airi. see you tomorrow*
---
## 📔 Journal Entry
Airi wrote through her tears:
*Dear Future Me,*
*Today Ren and I had our first real fight.*
*Not about jealousy or rumors or something external. About us. About whether we're strong enough for what's coming.*
*And the truth is, I don't know.*
*I want to be strong enough. Want to believe love conquers all. But Ms. Yamamoto's words keep echoing: "Love isn't always enough."*
*What if she's right? What if we're kids playing at forever, not understanding what forever costs?*
*But then I remember the festival. Remember Ren's promises. Remember how it feels to be held by someone who sees all of you and chooses you anyway.*
*That has to mean something. That has to be worth fighting for.*
*Tomorrow we'll talk. Really talk. About all the scary things we've been avoiding.*
*And maybe we'll realize we're not ready. Maybe we'll realize this is too hard.*
*But I don't think we will.*
*Because even in the middle of our fight, even when we were saying hurtful things, I never stopped loving him.*
*And I don't think he stopped loving me.*
*So tomorrow, we'll figure it out. Together.*
*Like we always do.*
*Love,**Present Airi (scared but hopeful)*
---*