The severing of a tie that should not have been bound I suppose.

The weekend is over.
I forgot that it had even passed on it was so fast like a bolt of lightening it came and was gone as though it had not even been.

I have my new outfit in my closet at home for tonight,Kenshin isn't even taking classes today because his credits have him near to graduate and he is doing another demonstration at a neighboring school with everyone there following my new webpage about it and it is growing faster and faster in followers and responses are positive.

Plus.
Nothing about my past,
For one.

I watch the paparazzi now and try my best not to hide anymore from the cameras,Kaoru gave me the longest talk in history on how to cope with sudden face time everywhere:

"All people really want to see is what you are,not the picture you are painting on for what you want to convey but the real YOU.So show them that,but do not let them bully the real you away into the you that is something you are hiding from.Be brave."

That is all I am picturing now.
Being brave and walking up the pathway slowly and with less track running style that I usually employ is new to me,but I am willing to try it this once.
For him.
The students mostly seem to have gotten used to seeing the photographers now but not the fact that they are only eyeing me and grabbing any method to get my photo,even a few try to get skirt shots and I run again,bravery out to the wind when I feel someone close in behind me.Shielding me.

"Come on,hurry before your underwear is top news on the gossip sites."

I am gently pushed in,the voice belongs to Arata who uses his height and frame to shield me as much as he can,We are by the lockers now.His is directly behind mine and he watches me as I put on the slippers I was gifted by Kenshin.

His eyes never seem to miss a beat,he looks at me like he wants to mourn somehow.The way those glasses wearing eyes inspect my newly layered haircut,or the fact I am actually wearing more than just a touch of blush and mascara for once.

Like I am a stranger to him.

"You are going through with trying to be a public figure,going through with dating a prodigy who girls will do ANYTHING to have?You are going to let some of yourself go to be with him in the end.You know that right?"

I look at him,I really look at him and to my surprise what I see is not jealously but hurt,concern too.

"I have a feeling Arata,I have to at least see if it is anything or nothing,shouldn't I?You took a gamble on opening up to me and I never meant to hurt you in that,but do I not have the right to take a gamble for myself too?"

I am amazed I even said that to him but I did.
It actually came out of me,maybe the Kaoru boldness is kicking in.

"Just...be happy,I am not going to be about it.You know that but....it doesn't matter,here is your phone back."
"What??"

Arata walks away softly,his head hanging and I watch him as he goes,I hold my phone and see that he left it on my journal app.

"If my heart can be trusted at all,I have to try and let him in but is it only going to get me hurt more?I watched my parents as they fell apart and now could I be doomed to that fate they have now because what I feel is what they said they felt.
I am so afraid that it will only be nice gooey feelings until my heart really gets involved then I am stuck for life.In front of a world that thinks I am a killer because I was so hurt over what was done to me,I didn't know the girl would kill herself,I just wanted to give back what she gave me......"

"Oh no....Why did you....?"
I mumble out-loud,the other students are staring at me holding my phone like grenade that I am afraid of,I simply march on to the room I have to.Catching sight of Arata shifting before my eyes into the hot nerd chef that is the most popular boy in this school now.

But a moment does slip by between he and I as my eyes lock onto his,like us when we were children and the moment came that I would have to leave his house to go home.He always looked like my leaving was taking part of him away.

Now.

It is like I am watching him cut it, that link with a chefs knife and I am letting him,I wish I didn't have to but...

"I don't trust you anymore,Arata."

Those words I mouth to him,all the classmates in here notice how he shifted even more from charming to at a loss.
As always,He recovers quickly.

I,for one.
Do not.