Kindness

“Alphonse…can we talk about something…?” Luna asked while fidgeting with her fingers.

The end of the group’s hangout had arrived, and they were just about to separate before Luna had made the request.

“Hm? Can’t you just say it here?” Alphonse asked.

“I…I would rather it be private…”

“I see. Unfortunately I have to walk Esme home…” Alphonse looked to see where Esme was, but she was already gone.

“It seems like she already left,” Sam said.

“Well, Sam, I also have to—”

“I actually said I would walk with Sam back,” Aion said.

“...” Alphonse looked at Aion for a couple seconds before heaving a sigh and saying, “Fine, it appears I have the time.”

Luna nodded, a blush on her face as the two headed off.

“So Luna’s confessing, huh?” Sam mused.

“She said it was her goal today. I suppose that it’s to be expected.”

“Expected?”

“Hm? The legend of Festival’s Eve would certainly imply her confession, no?”

“Ah…yeah…” Sam said that, but he looked down as if not convinced.

“Is there something more to this?”

“Well…Luna…she’s had feelings for Alphonse for the last few years…”

“The last few years?” Aion said, a little surprised.

“Yeah…”

“I see. I can understand what you mean now.”

“I suppose the real reason is Esme. Alphonse and she have been getting much closer this year.”

“They weren’t close before?”

Sam seemed hesitant to say anything else.

“It’s not that important,” Sam said. “The point is, this year things changed drastically, and I assume Luna has felt the pressure to do something before her love is ripped apart before she can even try anything.”

“That’s very sad…”

“Yeah…Luna…she’s…” Sam trailed off.

“Love should be allowed to blossom, you know?”

“It should be allowed, huh?”

“If someone can have such deep and dear feelings toward another, it deserves to be rewarded. Love is a precious thing. Something that can be nurtured and grown into a blossoming flower. A flower that can bear the most delectable of fruits. But if that love is denied or shut down, it would hurt. To get hurt by love, especially by the one you offer your love to, I find that to be extremely disgusting.”

Sam’s mouth fell a little open before he shut it and said no more. Perhaps he thought saying anything was inappropriate in the situation, or maybe the expression on Aion’s face had shut down Sam’s wish to say something. Aion wasn’t sure.

After all, he didn’t even know the expression he was making.

The silence stretched on as Aion stood still, waiting for Luna to run past.

Sam looked like he wanted to say something but chose not to.

And soon, Luna ran past Aion as his eyes looked down.

Alphonse came soon after, saying, “Ugh, that was a pain…”

Aion’s eyes shifted toward Alphonse, and he said, “It was, huh?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing. Absolutely nothing,” Aion said and ran off toward Luna.

This time, despite Aion running after Luna, he found himself running consciously instead of unconsciously.

One single loop had caused that difference.

One single week.

That’s all it took.

And yet, Aion wasn’t happy about it. He didn’t feel sad about it either. All he felt was a sense of anger as he ran. Perhaps it was because he was dreading what was coming. Or perhaps he was still mad at Alphonse. He couldn’t really say.

And soon, he saw the same sight. Luna was crying in front of the Lunalis Temple, curled up to protect herself from the woes of this world.

“What do you want?” Luna’s small voice was barely audible.

“Is it wrong to be there when a friend is in such a state?”

Luna laughed bitterly. “Friends, huh? Yeah, I guess we are.”

“I’m sorry that I can’t change the outcome, but Luna, I’m here, am I not?”

“And what is that supposed to do?”

“It’s better than wallowing in misery, no?”

“Probably…”

“So, even if you choose to say nothing, I’ll still be here, you know?”

Luna looked up at Aion with watery eyes from the tears. Several tear stains streaked down her face, and her hair was a little disorderly.

“Aion…”

“What’s up?”

“What are you?”

“What do you mean?”

“You don’t make any sense to me, that’s what.”

“People aren’t exactly easy to understand, you know.”

“...”

“But Luna, even so, I wish to understand you.”

“Aion, if you wish to understand me, can you grant a request of mine?”

“Depends on what it is…” Aion said while averting his gaze.

Aion knew what was coming.

Aion knew he couldn’t stop what was coming.

And Aion didn’t even try to stop what was coming.

“Can you kill me?”

“I won’t.”

“...”

Luna bit her lower lip, and blood was drawn, trickling down her lip.

“I refuse to kill anyone.”

Luna laughed and said, “Yeah, I expected as much. Aion Belial isn’t the sort of person to kill someone; even without knowing all that much about you, I know that much for certain.”

“So you have an impression of me?”

“Despite everything that you are and aren’t, I can say for certain you have such a conviction.”

“Despite only knowing me for six days, if we're generous, you’re that confident?”

“Am I wrong?”

“...”

“But Aion, everything else about you—what the hell are you?”

“I am Aion Belial, twenty years old, a college student, unemployed, and I have found myself in Magna with no memory of how I got here. That is who I am.”

Luna laughed and smiled derisively. “You really think I buy that bullshit? ‘Aion Belial’ isn’t what you described. So who the hell are you?”

“You claim to know me? What could you possibly know?”

“Your kindness—it’s all fake, right? Like you’re holding yourself back? I’ve seen you stop yourself multiple times, like you’re trying to be something that you aren’t. So who the hell are you?”

“Aion Belial.”

“What a shit response.”

“You asked a shit question.”

“Fine, then why do you act like you’re so kind? When in all reality you’re simply playing something, whatever it is.”

“You know nothing about me, so why are you even questioning me?”

Luna stood up and walked right into Aion’s face, her eyes mere centimeters apart from his.

“You really think I’d buy that you woke up in that shack with no memories of how you got there?”

“Why would I lie about that?”

“Why would you hide your personality? If anything, I’m justified in questioning everything about you!”

“I’d rather not say something hurtful.”

“Oh? You’re being considerate of poor little me's feelings?”

“Is that so wrong?”

“If you’re so considerate of me, why won’t you kill me? It’s what I want. What I’ve wanted for a long time.”

“Then kill yourself. Why does it have to be me?” Despite it being Aion’s words, a grimace formed on his face.

“And be damned? No, thank you.”

“Then find someone else to do it; you’re not well liked in this town, yes?” His words flowed like venom, a venom he wished not to spew, but spewed nonetheless.

“Huh?”

“What?”

“How do you know that?”

“Ah, well, Sam mentioned it,” Aion said to cover up his mistake. “And well, Alphonse treated you rather harshly, so—”

“If you already know, why don’t you realize that it’s pointless for me to continue living?”

“It’s never pointless to live. There’s always tomorrow, or the day after that. Or whenever! One day, you will find that it wasn’t pointless!” Aion said with a desperate expression.

“Wow~” Luna smiled and laughed coldly. “What hopeful garbage. Sometimes people have shit lives. And they continue to have shit lives no matter how long they live. That’s why it’s better to just die and ascend to the afterlife instead of suffering in a meaningless existence.”

“How do you know that there won’t be better days for you!? You can’t just claim that based on the past. The future is forever clouded in the unknown, so why are you so pessimistic about it!?”

“Ah…what a pain…”

“You find this to be a pain?” Aion asked, his voice quivering a little.

“Yeah, it is. Dealing with some faker lecturing me on the way to live my life is the worst.”

“You keep saying what I’m doing is fake, but you have no evidence! Is it so unbelievable that someone like me exists!?” Aion glared at Luna.

“No. The unbelievable part is you.”

“Huh?”

“I’ve seen how you are when you’re by yourself and your constant apathy. You’re telling me that someone who looks so bored and lifeless is as kind as the way you act in front of others? Absolutely not!”

“That’s merely an assumption based on nothing.”

“Perhaps, but you’re getting awfully defensive about this. Did I perhaps strike a nerve? Is there actually something deeper to all of this? Maybe I was bluffing, and now you’re making me believe what I’m saying is true. I mean, pushing others away while I’m grieving—that’s a normal reaction. But your defensiveness, that’s definitely not.”

Aion clenched his teeth, trying to calm the feeling clawing away at his heart.

“Look, I get you’ve been hurt, but we can come to a happier conclusion than you dying! I know I’m not the greatest of choices, but I swear I really do care!”

“I’d rather not discuss my future with a liar unless they’re willing to kill me.”

“Then go find someone in Magna! I—I can’t do something like that!”

Luna laughed and said, “Do you really think those people would sin like that? Only an outsider can grant me my wish. So give me what I desire!”

Luna grabbed Aion’s collar with a pained expression on her face.

“There’s nothing else!? You can’t wish for anything more!? Can I not try and grant you happiness!?”

“You can’t! Aion Belial cannot grant me happiness!”

Her words slammed into Aion like a massive weight, a weight he couldn’t lift or push off of him. This weight, he felt its truth—its conviction.

“You’re just throwing around assumptions! I can help; I definitely can!”

“Then give me back the one person who could talk to me, care for me, and understand me!”

“I can’t do that! I don’t even know who you’re talking about!”

“That’s my point! How can you do anything for me when you know nothing about me!? You’re just pushing your desire to help me onto me without me agreeing! Have you ever thought that I don’t want that!? Or are you perhaps too self-centered to see that!?”

Aion shoved Luna away from him and yelled, “Self-centered!? I know nothing about you!? I’m just pushing my desire to help you!? What the fuck do you know about what I want!? Have you even considered that helping others is simply a normal thing!? Have you really been hurt that badly by this place!? So Luna, tell me, tell me why you can’t see that!”

Luna glared at Aion and spat, “You would never understand! Someone who’s never been treated like the spawn of evil can never understand what I’ve gone through! Someone who’s never killed anyone can never understand what I’ve gone through!”

“Can’t I try!? What harm is there in trying!?”

“And for what? Me to be treated like a monster by another person!? Why would I ever agree to that!? Aion, you and I are completely different! If you’re really that kind, that genuine with who you are, there’s no way you and I could ever understand one another! So just leave me! Leave me to wilt alone so that you can shine elsewhere!”

“No! I won’t leave! I can’t, I can’t!” Aion felt hot tears starting to well up in his eyes.

Luna laughed as more tears flowed from her eyes. “Yeah, that’s it, huh? This is my punishment for being so arrogant, right? So please, Lunalis, please, God! Set me free from my Hell already! I beg you!”

“Stop praying to powers that won’t help you and accept my hand instead!”

“No, Aion Belial, you and I are too different. We’ll never get along, and that’s okay, isn’t it? Not everyone can understand each other; I mean, we’re all flawed after all? We can only see things from our own perspectives, right? So, Aion, keep your perspective clean. Keep it away from my filth. You don’t have to kill me. You don’t even have to talk to me anymore. Just keep yourself away from my filth so that your life is never dirtied. Can’t you do that? Won’t you accept your friend’s final request? Can you not grant this request to me as my only friend?”

Aion bit his lip and said, “That’s not fair! That’s completely unfair!”

Tears flowed down his eyes as his breathing was erratic. He clutched at his heart as if he was in pain.

Luna smiled sadly and said, “Ah, so, Aion, you really are that kind, huh?”

Aion’s eyes flared with several emotions as more tears dropped from his eyes.

“No…no! I’m not kind! I’m terrible—I’m horrible even! So you see, I’m already filthy. You don’t have to worry about dirtying me, so please don’t just push me away like that!”

Aion’s eyes were pleading as he desperately stared into Luna’s.

“Yes…I…was a fool to think you were faking it…you really were being considerate. If I’d known that…no…no point in saying anything more on that. So, thank you for being my friend, Aion. For the little time we were friends, I had fun. So please forget about me, okay?”

Luna gave a smile at the end that made Aion’s heart ache.

“No, I won’t—”

Luna, before Aion could finish what he was saying, chopped his neck, and Aion’s body fell limp as he was knocked out.

All the tension in his body lightening in one moment.

“Please forget me all over again…” Luna whispered her final words of farewell as she picked his body up and carried him off.

Into the setting sun, Luna disappeared.