Vol.3 Ch.55 - This might hurt a bit

Recounting the previous events that transpired in the dungeon: We were toldthat we’ll be fighting a fearsome foe before we advanced to the next floor,but what instead happened was that we found the door leading to the nextfloor before meeting any such beast.Instead of considering ourselves lucky and simply moving forward, wequickly became paranoid of what would come if we didn’t obey the Book’sprediction. After looking around for a while we simply decided to sit downand wait patiently for danger to approach us.We sat for what felt like an eternity in silence, with none of us even realizinghow dumb of a plan we were enacting. Before long though, we finally caughta far off glimpse of a Minotaurus on the other side of the room, peacefullyminding its own business.In that very moment, we decided to run head first into danger purely for thesake of following the Book’s instructions, which then led to a deadly battlewith the beast. In the end, thanks to all of our efforts, we finally succeeded inslaying the Minotaurus which lead to us victoriously returning to the door aseveryone cheered each other on.Marina, having stayed behind to look after our stuff (and so as not to get putin harm’s way) quickly noticed how heavily wounded we were. She not onlysuggested, but insisted she nurse us back to tip-top shape.We were a bit hesitant about the whole idea, seeing as she definitely wasn’tin the right state of mind to play doctor, but after reading a passage from theBook indicating we’re in safe hands, we rightfully sat back down andallowed Marina to have her way with us.Thankfully though, it seems Marina has gotten a lot more of her vocabularyback after spending some time with us. It looks like she might actually evenmake a full recovery if things keep going this smoothly! Although I find itcurious how she retained her medical training. She mentioned her family tobe a world-renowned group of doctors, so maybe she had the knowledge sodeeply ingrained in her head that the Golden Apple’s effects didn’t reach thatpart of her brain?***“So, Gramps,” Marina addressed Linus, “tell me if this hurts.”“YEEEAOWWWW!” He yelped in extreme pain as soon as she daintly hithis knee with a little hammer she got out from her backpack.Her hands were very small and soft, so it’s not like she hit him hard. Thatbeing said, I see no reason as to why she would even consider hitting himwith the intent for it to hurt. I believe she meant to check his reflexes at first,but it looks like she found another, more pressing issue. Indeed, Old ManLinus had a bad knee.“This won’t do!” Marina said as she pulled out some Instarope from theluggage.“What are you going to do with that?” He asked her with fear in his eyes.“Just shut up and hold still.” She said as she held a nearby plank of wood upto his knee.Just then, the Instarope she held in her hands burst open, quickly coiling itselfaround his leg and fastening the wooden plank to an almost airtight degree.The other party members (including me) simply stood there, fascinated by heramazing adaptability to the environment. What she did was essentially makea makeshift splint to help readjust his knee into the correct place. Thetightness allowed for the pressure to passively push his dislocated knee backinto place as he walked. Truly a magnificent display of practical knowledge!“That’s amazing! And it doesn’t even hurt that much!” Linus said as he wipedthe sweat from his brows. Clearly he didn’t trust Marina to be this capable,but it looks like he changed his mind quickly after getting his injury treated.“Okay, next up is Lil’ Bro Sully!” She said as she turned to the discontentshorty.“Why am I your Little Bro? I’m older than you!” said Sullivan.“You’re short.” The entire party said in unison with a monotone voice.We didn’t even want to hurt his feelings, we just wanted to let him know incase he genuinely didn’t know.He grumbled a bit more before finally telling her “Fine! Check my shoulder,would ya? It’s been killing me for a while now.”“Stop lying!” She karate chopped his head as if to scold him, “It’s obviousyour shoulders are fine! It’s your back that’s been bothering you!”We couldn’t really tell the difference, so we simply looked on at her with aquestion mark sprouting from our heads.“Come on, guys! It’s common knowledge that when a short person doesn’thave proper sleeping posture, their spine will go out of whack!” Sheexplained.Certainly, he’s got a very peculiar way of sleeping. I’ve never once seenhim wake up in the same position as when he fell asleep the previousnight…“Apart from that, you’ve been carrying both your luggage and Big Sis’!”Marina recalled another possible culprit to his backache, ”I’m honestlysurprised you made it this far without popping your back, you’re an archerfor Gods’ sake, take better care of your spine!”After giving him the lecture of a lifetime (with the scolding being free ofcharge, of course), Marina actually had to stop to take a breath before shecould continue. The now chipper Linus gave her a flask of water to helpclear her throat.“I didn’t know I was influencing Sully’s aching back. My bad on that one, sosorry!” Miss Lionheart clasped her hands together as if she was asking forforgiveness, “Since Sully offered to carry my things, I thought he was doingfine.”“What kind of gentleman would allow a lady to carry around such heavyluggage?” Sullivan refuted with a question of his own.We once again gave him a death glare as Marina was getting ready for round2 of “The Scoldening”, but she decided to count to 10 instead and simply dowhat she promised to do.“Lil’ Bro, lie down on the floor, will ya’?” She said calmly.Sullivan obliged so as not to anger her any further, but quickly found theposition he was in to be quite uncomfortable. He was laid out in a proneposition, but for whatever reason it looked quite odd. If I had to describe it,it was as if one side of his body was longer than the other, effectively makinghis entire figure quite skewed.“Just as I had presumed!” Marina mimicked blowing on a pipe as if she wassome Ace Detective, “You have scoliosis.”Scolly whose sis?“It’s a condition that affects those with a weakened back. You carry too muchweight, especially on your left side, which is why your right side is placedhigher when you lay down like this.” She explained to us the symptoms ofthis condition before continuing, “This makes sense too. Since you’re anarcher, you carry a quiver on your left shoulder, but that begs the question:DIDN’T YOUR INSTRUCTOR TEACH YOU TO DO BACKEXERCISES DAILY?”“Uhh, she did.” Sullivan spoke quietly upon experiencing Marina’s wrath onfull display, “But I didn’t really think it to be that important, so I might’veskipped a few weeks.”“A FEW WEEKS!?” Marina almost fainted from the shock, “That’s it! I needto correct your posture immediately! No holds barred!”After making such a heroic sounding proclamation, she quickly sat down onhis back, her butt facing his neck. We wondered what she was going to do,but quickly realized her intentions after she bent back to grab his hands frombehind. What proceeded this limber action were the agonizing shrieks of ourdear shorty-err, Sullivan.“Ahhh! I give, I give! Let go, you’ll break my back, woman!” He yelped andyelped, but to no avail.“No can do, Lil’ Bro.” She said as she hunched herself forward once more(much to Sullivan’s dismay), “I gotta fix your back pronto, we can’t have ourarcher pop his back in the midst of a fierce battle now, can we?”After that painful sight, he was quickly propped back up into a sittingposition, although there wasn’t even an ounce of relief in his face (as was thecase for Linus). He actually looked to be in worse shape than before she gotto him. Looks like the Book lied after all…“I kinda feel better, but that might just be because of the adrenaline.” He saidas he gasped for air.“Exactly, that’s the point.” She looked at him with a proud, smug look on herface, “Correcting scoliosis isn’t something you can do in a day. It takesmonths, if not years, depending on the doctor that’s treating you. What I didwas purely a precaution to make sure you’re properly warmed up for the nextbattle we inevitably face.”“You… You fiend!” Sullivan cried as he clung to Miss Lionheart. It wassupposed to look like a man seeking refuge in his lover’s warm embrace, butthanks to their height difference they mostly looked like a mother-son duo(wait, I shouldn’t be saying that, it makes their whole situation weird).“Seriously, Marina,” Miss Lionheart protected the frail Sullivan, “Youshouldn’t bully the boys just because you’ve been given the chance to.Although I do see the appeal in teasing them…”“What are you talking about, Big Sis?” Marina turned to her with a scarygrin, “You’re next.”The room suddenly got eerily quiet, and the only thing we could hear wasMiss Lionheart gulping with a fearful expression. Honestly, it was kind offunny, but none of us guys had the bravery to say it out loud.“Okay,” Marina said, clapping her hands together as if to psyche everyoneup, “let’s get you checked up!”What followed this oddly unnerving proclamation of hers was an equally oddsurprise. Marina was basically feeling Miss Lionheart up from head to toe,not skipping a single spot on her body. Not gonna lie, it was kind of a… nicesight to behold.“U-Uhh, Marina? T-That kind of tickles, heheh…” Miss Lionheart tried herbest to suppress her laughter from bursting out, the edges of her lipsquivering as if they’re about to crack a slight smile, “No seriously, stop itpfft!”“Hold still, I need to check your heartrate, but those two mounds on yourchest are getting in the way!” Marina copped a few more feels beforeultimately giving up, “Ugh, this is impossible! Well, I can always check fromyour back…”As she said this, she whipped out a stethoscope out of her backpack and putthe listening part of the instrument in her ears. Honestly, who brings astethoscope to a dungeon raid?“WAAAH!?!?” Miss Lionheart suddenly yelped in surprise, “C-C-C-CCOLD!!”After they fiddled around each other a bit more, the ‘inspection’ finallyconcluded. And the verdict?“Yep, she’s all good, if a bit starved.” Marina said with a proud smile as ifshe’s a surgeon who successfully saved a person’s life, “I’ve noticed thiseven before we entered the dungeon, Big Sis, but you’re really starvingyourself to keep your waistline in check. Even from this far away I could tellyour movements during the fight with the Minotaurus were sluggish at best.”“What can I say?” Miss Lionheart added onto that, “A lady’s gotta be in tiptop shape if she wants to be in this line of business, no?”“Well, yes.” Marina said flatly, “But starving yourself out to the point of yourbody being on the brink of giving out isn’t exactly what I’d call tip-top shape.Once we get back home, you need to eat a ton, y’hear?”The room went silent as Marina’s hopeful words left her mouth. The reasonwas quite obvious, too. If we were to believe the Book’s prophecy, theneveryone in this room (safe from me) will die in this dungeon. I can onlyimagine the mental toll this revelation is making them endure. For all weknow, any room we enter could be the last room they see, and the Bookdidn’t go into detail as to who will fall first, where and how. The thing Ifound to be quite fascinating, in fact, was the way they all dealt with thisseemingly unbearable feeling.Call me morbid, but I seriously do find these observations of mineinteresting, at least to a certain degree. You see, Sullivan has presentedhimself as the self-proclaimed leader of the group when we first met, he’strying to lift everyone’s spirits by providing us with humorous jokes, but ifyou look closely, you’ll notice he can’t keep still. Even when standing orsitting down, he restlessly bobs his right leg up and down in a never-endingmotion. He’s nervous.Old Man Linus is clinging on for dear life, it seems. An old adventurer whois nearing the end of his life, hopelessly seeking any semblance of acontinuation to his story. If I had to describe his condition with one word, I’dcall it pitiful. Even when I look at him, I’m almost repulsed by the sight ofthis pathetic old man who just won’t accept even the mere idea of death.Then again, I guess that’s something to revere, in a way…And then there’s Miss Lionheart. She seems to be taking it the worst. Shementioned something about her sister, I wonder how often she thinks of her?In my anger and hastiness to just get this over with and go home, I calledthese guys all sorts of bad names (well, at least internally). I guessapologizing wouldn’t make sense, so the only way to atone is to be ascompliant as possible.Looking at all of them right now, I don’t even see a sliver of the adventurers Isaw back when we first met. But also, I see such a magnificent sight ofadventurers who are on a whole ‘nother level to the idiots who left me backat base. These are people who are looking death in the eyes and saying “Fuckoff”. You’d expect their eyes to be devoid of any emotion, but in fact it’squite the opposite. They’re filled with the hope of somehow finding a wayout of here alive, and I’m there to help them achieve that future.In any case, Marina’s words held no ill intentions, since she didn’t have thecognitive ability to understand the dread of their days (scratch that, hours)being numbered. We knew she wasn’t saying this on purpose, so we chose toagree with her and be naively optimistic.The two guys next to me were kind of butthurt about Miss Lionheart nothaving to endure any of Marina’s doctoral miracle work, but the sounds andimagery they provided us were more than enough to keep us from revolting.In fact, I think this was a better outcome than what we could ever hope for, ina way.“So that only leaves Big Bro, huh?” Marina turned to me finally, “Lemmehave a looksie…”She examined me like she did Miss Lionheart just now, except without thesuggestive moans and quivers. I guess guys really do have a warmer bodytemperature, after all…“Well, you’re a Green Iro (at least as of now), so I figured you’d be in a bitbetter shape than these guys.” Said Marina as she packed her equipment backinto her backpack, “Come on guys, adventure awaits.” She said as a matter offact.“So I’m all good?” I asked as if not being able to believe how quickly mycheckup was done and over with.“Well, if you really want some advice,” Marina looked back at me, “as aGreen Iro, your body’s pretty quick to heal, but that doesn’t make youimmortal.”Immortal? What does she mean by that? Is she making fun of me?“My dad would have reckless Green Iros come to his clinic all the time.”She said as she recalled her childhood, “They’re all the same, thinkingthemselves to be immortal or something as they jump into harm’s waywithout a second thought.”“That’s not-!” me… I tried saying, but I quickly recalled my own childhood.At the age of 13, I fought a mother snair with nothing more than a book in myhand. Just half a year later, I ran into a stray wolf and lucked out by triggeringSpark. I remember making Anna worry quite a bit back then…Even then, instead of thanking the stars for getting out of these situations aliveand staying back at Trivis Numerica to help Arthur globalize his restaurant, Isimply decided to run on over to Great Hiana to engage in countless gangwars. Thinking back, I really did naively write myself off as immortal,huh?“I knew that!” I shot back, angered at the fact she read me like a book, “Noone can escape death, idiot!”I didn’t mean to make it sound so depressing, but that’s just how it turned out.The other party members didn’t find my choice of words to be thatappropriate for the situation though, so my comment was met with scoffs andnasty glares.We proceeded to the next floor in silence.