Lesson Twelve: Trial of the Misfits

Morning sunlight shimmered through the shrine courtyard like ripples over water. Birds chirped. Leaves rustled. Everything was calm.

Except the group of eight yokai children vibrating with excitement in front of the torii.

Mutsuki tightened his ponytail and his satchel straps.

‘Alright, class. Today is our first real-world field test.’

Eight gasps. One dramatic swoon from Gon.

‘The best way for you all to remember your manners, is to put it into practice.’

Youchan raised a brow. ‘Are you sure you want to do this, Sensei?’

‘No,’ Mutsuki whispered.

And added louder. ‘Yes. Absolutely. For educational purposes.’

‘I won’t be leaving the shrine Sensei, but if there’s any need for me at all, I am one portal away.’

Mutsuki gazed at Youchan longingly and held himself back from holding her hand in front of the kids.

‘I’ve made it this far because of your support. I will do you proud.’ He turned to face the children who started teasing them both.

‘Settle down.’ He clapped his hands together. ‘Today’s location is…’

He paused for suspense. Mon’s hat produced drumroll sounds. Mutsuki pointed dramatically toward the path leading downhill.

‘The Human Village Market!’

Eight children erupted like fireworks.

‘REAL FOOD?!’

‘I WANT FISH.’

‘DOES HUMAN CHILDREN BOW??’

‘CAN I HUG A HUMAN?!’

‘CAN I SHOW THEM MY WINGS?!’

‘ABSOLUTELY NOT,’ Mutsuki cut in immediately.

He took a deep breath. And clapped some magic into the air to make the kids pay attention to him. He wrote in the air using fallen sakura petals.

‘Only those able to follow these simple set of rules as we go through the human village, would pass the test. I may or may not grant a prize if all of you passes.’

Thunderous reactions. Every child spoke over each other. No one was listening.

‘Make Sensei perform for us.’

‘Make Sensei buy us human toys.’

‘Make Sensei buy us food.’

‘Make Sensei give up on Youcha—‘

‘OY!’ Mutsuki clapped a second time with more power infused, to end the mishmash of wishes.

‘Listen to me now. We need to go soon before it becomes human rush hour on the market. Rule number one: Illusions ON. No tails, no ears, no wings, no magic. You look human for the next two hours.’

A chorus of groans.

‘Rule number two: connected to number one, do not reveal your identity. IF, you ever have to use magic… IF… make sure it must not be seen by any humans.’

More groans and complaints.

‘Rule number three: Stay with your partner. No running off. No exceptions.’

Some violent reactions and hissing.

‘That’s extra now…’ Mutsuki shook his head. ‘Rule number four: Never harm humans.’

Light ohhs and ahhs. One tchhh.

‘Hey who said that?’ Mutsuki snapped his head around. All children except Honey who was already human shaped, looked elsewhere.

‘I’m watching you all…’ Mutsuki warned. ‘ Carrying on, rule number five: No stealing… Mon.’

Mon gasped. ‘I would never. Probably.’

Mutsuki rubbed his temple. ‘Exactly my fear.’

Youchan whispered from behind him, ‘Good luck.’

After securing everyone’s human shaped illusions, the misfits followed him down the path toward the small village. Just a tiny scenic tourist stop just outside the shrine grounds, but enough to do the job. Perfect for practical exams and close enough to run for their lives.

‘Welcome to the human market,’ Mutsuki proudly announced to the children using his magic so that no one else would hear. ‘Please don’t touch anything.’

The village market was lively. Vendors called, children laughed, old ladies bargained for produce. The smell of grilled skewers drifted in the air. It was everything the children dreamed of.

‘Alright,’ he started. ‘Observe human behavior. Walk politely. No magic.’

They took one cautious step forward. And the chaos began immediately.

Honey spotted a stand selling roasted sweet potatoes. ‘SENSEI SWEET POTATO LETS GO!’

‘Walking, Honey! Not charging!’

Honey slowed to a bouncy trot.

Sumire glided past and studied the townsfolk with regal inspection. ‘They look… peaceful. And fragile.’

‘Don’t touch anyone,’ Mutsuki warned.

‘I wouldn’t!’ she said. The next second, she immediately reached to poke a decorative water fountain before Youchan gently pulled her back. The children erupted in pleasant surprise. Mutsuki muted their voices before the market heard a startling mix of howls, roars and screams.

Youchan pointed to a small torii gate on the market corner. ‘That’s how I move from the shrine to the markets.’ She confessed. ‘I was too concerned to leave you all alone.’

Mutsuki was able to mute the noise but he wasn't able to wipe the happiness from his face as he looked at her. The kids screamed some more, but for a different reason now. Youchan smiled back.

Kojiro jumped in between them to ruin the moment. He strutted on ahead with crossed arms, scrutinizing human posture like a competitive judge.

‘Their gait is inefficient,’ he muttered. ‘Do humans not understand back alignment?’

Gon trotted beside him. His tail swished invisibly under the illusion.

‘I LIKE IT HERE. So many smells! So many hearts! So many people who will fall in love with me!’

‘Focus,’ Mutsuki said.

Akashi walked with hands in pockets in an attempt to look cool. ‘Sensei. Can I beat up anyone?’

‘NO.’

Meow held onto Youchan’s sleeve like an anchor. ‘I’m scared. What if I… um… do something unlucky?’

‘You’re with me,’ Youchan said. ‘Nothing will happen.’

Meow nodded with full trust.

Kishin stuck to Mutsuki’s back like a shadow. He whispered, ‘Sensei… Sensei… humans look scary…’

‘They’re just people,’ Mutsuki reassured him. ‘No oni hunters here.’

Kishin relaxed. Mon, of course, had already wandered toward a stand selling wind-up toys.

‘Sensei look!! These are like tiny living things!’

‘DO NOT FEED THEM MAGIC,’ Mutsuki said sharply as he grabbed him by the collar.

‘Aw…’

After walking to a corner market grocery area, Mutsuki paused and looked back on his envoy. The children are still in a line. It’s crooked but it will have to do. Youchan is beautiful as ever on the back.

‘Alright,’ Mutsuki said as he guided them to a small fruit stall, ‘you each get to buy ONE thing. With human money. Politely and orderly.’

The class froze.

Mutsuki repeated himself. ‘Please buy something without causing a national incident. Can we do that?’

‘…With human money?’ Mon gasped as if Mutsuki announced they’d be asked to lift a mountain.

Gon leaned in. ‘We get to talk to a real human??’

Meow trembled violently. ‘I shouldn’t. I’ll accidentally curse the apples to explode…’

‘No you won’t,’ Mutsuki soothed.

He gave each child a coin.

‘Repeat after me: “One order of ___ please.”’

‘One order of beef please!’ Honey yelled.

‘We’re at a fruit stall,’ Mutsuki sighed.

They lined up. Sumire went first. Her bow was flawless, like a small salaryman who made a mistake.

‘One order of the green apple, please,’ she said with perfect courtesy.

‘O-oh! Aren’t you a polite little thing,’ the vendor exclaimed.

Sumire looked victorious. Next was Meow.

Her hands trembled. ‘O-One banana… please.’

Nothing exploded. The banana didn’t rot. The table didn’t collapse.

‘Here you go, sweetheart,’ the vendor said kindly.

Meow’s eyes shimmered. ‘I DID IT.’

Honey grabbed three apples with greedy joy.

‘One thing, Honey!’ Mutsuki said.

Honey whimpered, returned two, and bowed dramatically. ‘One apple please!’

Akashi flirted with the idea of buying the wrong item just to challenge authority, but one stern look from Youchan corrected the spark in his eyes.

Mon attempted to haggle. ‘What if I give you this shiny stone instead?’

‘Put that away,’ Mutsuki hissed.

Kojiro bought a single grape. One. Because ‘anything more would be excessive.’

Kishin dropped his coin but the vendor kindly picked it up.

Gon winked flirtatiously as he purchased strawberries.

‘Stop trying to charm the fruit seller,’ Mutsuki warned.

After congratulating each child for a job well done, Mutsuki led them to the center of the square.

‘Your next task: quietly observe humans. How do they behave? How do they show emotion? How do they move?’

The children took this very, VERY differently.

Honey began hugging trees. ‘I’m practicing blending in.’

‘Honey, humans don’t… never mind.’ Why am I just realizing this? Isn’t Honey’s spirit supposed to be a demon bear? Not koala? Sigh…. Nevermind. He just looks like a normal boy climbing trees anyways.

Gon strutted like he owned the place. ‘I think I understand humans. They fall in love with confidence.’

‘No flirting,’ Youchan warned.

‘I’m not flirting. I’m smiling attractively.’

Sumire took notes. ‘Humans queue. Interesting.’

Kojiro judged people silently, until his looming dark aura affected a small area and people avoided walking into it. Mon followed behind an injured human child to copy their walk. He exaggerated it so badly that Mutsuki dragged him back.

‘That’s called bullying.’

Akashi stalked every dog that passed by. ‘He’s looking at me funny.’

‘That is a chihuahua, Akashi. Leave it alone.’

Meow almost tripped, but Youchan caught her again. Kishin bowed respectfully to every person who made eye contact. Some elderly people bowed back. He panicked every time.

Mutsuki couldn’t believe his eyes. Everything is going suspiciously well…

He was on such a high alert that when a tourist tripped over his camera and stumbled toward the koi pond, Mutsuki was ready.

Meow yelped. Kishin screamed. Honey gasped. Akashi prepared to dive after him. Gon readied a dramatic rescue pose. Mon reached into his hat (danger). Sumire pulled water toward her instinctively. Kojiro prepared a wind cushion. All hell was about to break loose.

Mutsuki lifted one hand.

A soft, perfectly controlled cushion of magic caught the man gently before he hit the water and set him upright. No one noticed the spell. Not even the man. He blinked, confused, bowed to the group that was looking at him, and walked off without understanding what saved him.

The children stared at Mutsuki like he’d parted the sea.

Sumire whispered in awe, ‘Your control is remarkable.’

Kishin shimmered with admiration. ‘Sensei saved him… so cool…’

Gon flicked his hair. ‘Obviously Sensei is amazing. He’s my role model.’

Mon’s hat spat sparkles in approval.

Meow wiped her eyes. ‘Nothing bad happened… because Sensei was here…’

Mutsuki scratched his cheek. ‘It’s nothing. Really.’

Youchan reached out to his sleeves and smiled softly. ‘No. You handled it perfectly.’

Clearly the only comment that made him smile. The kids got annoyed at started to pull on his skirt.

‘You flirt!’

‘Only care for girls!’

‘Sensei I am a girl too! Blush for me.’

They all laughed as they slowly shuffled out of the market. By then, the sun had dipped low enough to cast long shadows across the path. The air was soft and warm. The children requested for Mutsuki to sing for them as their reward for being good, and he did. Everything felt at ease. It was another successful day.