Cherry Blossoms of Entering the Academy

It was during the break before my first year of high school at the Academy.

A parcel was dropped off at our newest address, a thick packet of letters, all to me.

I didn’t cry. Supposedly. But that day I cried more than I had ever before.

The latest timeworn letter from Yui… As soon as I read it, I knew I would be her first subscriber. MidnightChef would be my ID.

Oh, she already had hundreds of thousands of subscribers.

I would start my own videos too.

I didn’t feel it was right to return any message other than the fact that I was entering the Academy and hadn’t forgotten our promise. I felt disgusted with myself, from the pits of my gut.

Until then, our shop would be open.

And here we were.

Whenever anyone tried to close the distance, I was reminded of that heartbreak. My feet started to move away.

So, when Yui came into the shop for a long-awaited hug, my first instinct wasn’t to wrap my arms around her. It was: “Get me out of this shop.”

It was never my intention to have Yui on the receiving end.

I was breaking hearts and threatening my own way of living.

What I called my inner peace was being torn, as it should, it was a weakness, my sins, the malice within me, I should celebrate its collapse, but I was still affected by its pain, the lack of it, these non-existent feelings that were everything I had for such a long time.

I loved myself dearly?

I hated myself.

“Talk to me. Close the distance. I want to read the emotions in my heart. As long as I can break this fragile inner peace, this is all that matters!”

But because I was human, I wasn’t able to express this cry for help.

My cooking was still better than my words ever used to be.

What had I become?

My hands were at my cage of internal self-discovery. I was bellowing with all gathered rage, pulling and tugging at the immovable bars.

Bars noticed with the letters.

Bars made movable by Kotone.

Yui was right in front of me. I didn’t want her to leave.

“Fine,” I could hardly manage my agreement. “You’re such a high-maintenance woman, I’m almost glad for the breathing room. Let’s do it. A solo video on your channel.”

“Really?”

“If it works for our reopening, we do a collab.”

“You sound like you’re trying to make this transactional, Rintarō-kun. Business conditions, metrics, you’re so responsible.”

“I’ll bring my best camera setup.”

“And snacks. You always forgot to eat when you cooked too long.”

“And snacks,” I repeated. “You bring them.”

My eyes, wet, were remarkable. They could see. My heart’s the one I’ve been running from all this time.