Chapter 4

The delivery Major Takahashi had been waiting for arrived in the middle of the night, hours after the scheduled time, so after having spent most of the night at his desk, waiting for it, he was as tired as I was when I reported for duty in the morning.

I had never asked him why he didn’t retire after the war ended, I didn’t need to. Like many others, he didn’t have anything to come home to after the war. I knew he had joined Home Defence searching for revenge with an Artemis launcher on those bastards who had destroyed his home. We weren’t that different, except for the fact that I never had a family in the first place, but that detail didn’t really matter. We understood each other and had learned to accept our differences, for most of the time.

“Did you get her home?”, he asked as I studied the blackboard, trying to make sense of today’s work assignments.

“Yes, she lives next door.”

I glanced at the map taped to the wall. Discussing Them or any other friendly chatter was the last thing I needed now.

“We should be done with E-47 today, so the machines can move there tomorrow”, I said.

“Good,” he smiled, probably happier about her fate than our work progress, but he understood the hint and didn’t ask any further, even if I was sure he wanted to.

It was still early, so we had time before the teams assembled. Normally, I liked our quiet mornings spent in front of the charts showing our progress, with a cup of coffee at hand. But not today… Last night had left me unsettled.

I could take a day off. The Military for Peace initiative had pretty lax rules, having volunteers from all around the world coming together to rebuild our world, and Major Takahashi ran HW-4 more like a company than a combat unit. But being stuck in my small flat with nothing to do filled me with dread.

I left the building and sat down on the steps outside with another cup of coffee in my hands. Morning run had helped clear my head, but the unsettling stillness of the compound started to invite unwanted thoughts and questions I had no means to answer, no matter how much I wanted to.

By the time everyone arrived, my coffee was cold. They were a ragtag group bound by their contract, lured by extra pay and forced by boredom after the war had ended. Some did it for the unity, but luckily, those were few and far between. After a quick briefing, I headed towards Fenrir waiting for me in the sea of rubble.

I felt a rush of adrenaline when I donned my combat suit and climbed into the cockpit. A strange excitement mingled with calm as the systems slowly came online. I always felt like this before a mission, and I welcomed those feelings with open arms. Finally, I felt alive.

Tau flooded my body, bringing back the burning sensation I felt yesterday, but this time I didn't care. I smiled as the reality around me became sharper and more defined. She was right, we didn’t really understand it as they did, but we had learned to use it to the fullest of what we knew and compensate for the rest with technology that was beyond their comprehension. We had won. I smiled and adjusted the resolution of the scanners as I walked to the uncleared part of our sector.

Work wasn’t hard but required enough focus to keep unwanted thoughts at bay, and Tau filled my emptiness with sharp edges and geometric patterns, my implant flashing before my eyes. In moments like these, I missed my squad. Lucky bastards. Those who had somewhere to go back to got demobbed as soon as the war ended. Raptor and Cage got deployed to the other side to keep the stinkers in check, and Vanity… I almost chuckled. Who would have imagined that their love for souvenirs would lead them to study that crap at uni? At least they got a lucky card, as the civis were more than happy to help anyone leave the military so they could finally cut their spending. I got it. With 30% of the population enlisted in the armed forces, costs were astronomical, but still, I missed the good old days.

My scanner flashed red, and I focused my attention on the display. A Garuda rocket? Those were nasty, if you were a stinker… Brilliant design by some Indian dude, they weren’t as reliable as Artemis, but the low production costs compensated for it well enough to justify mass production.

I reported UXO through the radio and waited for everyone to clear the parameter. We had learned a while ago that it was faster to blow them with an autocannon than to follow proper disposal procedures. Here, no one cared if the explosion would turn rubble into more rubble.

“Area clear, you can proceed, Fury.”

“Roger that “

I took position and aimed the cannon, feeling a rush of adrenaline. Just like in the good old days… I smiled and pulled the trigger. Fenrir’s systems muffled the sound of the explosion, and the recoil was minimal, but for the first time in a long time, I felt alive.

I waited for the dust to clear, then ran the scanners. The dud was gone. This was fun, but unfortunately, the rest of the day passed uneventfully. When my shift was over, I got out of my combat suit and sat on a pile of rubble next to Fenrir, partially to calm down and let Tau slowly disperse, partially to avoid any pointless invitations to hang out after the work with the rest of the team.

They were okay for most of the time, but none of them had gone to the other side. We had built the gates as the war was ending, and before that, only our power armour could make a jump. I guess our experiences were too different, and their endless talks about what they would do after they get demobbed put me in a foul mood. I neither hoped for it nor had an idea what to do if it happened. The military was the closest thing to home I ever had…

I sighed. It was pointless to think about it, but yet again, despite my best efforts, I spaced out, letting my mind drift. When I made my way back to the compound, it was almost empty. Good, I had too much going on in my head to deal with anyone.

There was one klick to my flat, but I didn’t mind walking. It helped keep my head clear, and applying for a car was a waste of time. Considering how Military for Peace was run, I could end up with a bicycle or get a car the week before I get redeployed.

I left the compound and started walking home. Not that anything was waiting for me there, maybe except for a shower, but what else was I supposed to do? Was taking this assignment a mistake…? No matter how boring life at base was, there was always something to do there…