Figure it out

The windows were bathing the cafe with the twinlight.

I was lost in thought and my hands were wiping the table like a broken machine.

It's been a few days since my um… date I guess.

Her calling it date wasn't the thing bugging me. It was what happened afterwards. Those strange desires of mine were what kept bugging me.

I am not a pervert who would want to hug a girl without a reason… yeah like what happened that time at the park with that onee-san, even that was necessary otherwise nah, no, never.

The way my mind plays it again again, like if we were the only ones in the world at that time, the thing that I don't remember anything else other than her laughing face, it's all… strange for me.

“YOU LISTENING!!” Sayuri-san yelled as she slammed the table.

“Arh!!” I jumped back.

“Seriously! What is it with you these days?” She was clearly annoyed.

Going back behind the counter with the plates in hand she continued,

“You have been rubbing the same spot for a minute or so.”

Yeah I was. When I looked at the spot it was shining brighter than my future.

“It's good that you are only absent minded during the break. If not then I don't know what would have happened.”

Thank goodness I didn't showered any customers with coffee during my shift or I would have seen a grown up woman angry for the first time in life.

“S-Sorry.” It was the only thing I could respond with.

I should have left all these thoughts at home and focused on work.

Opening the door with a clack, Sachi-san entered the cafe.

“Thaks for the hard work!”

“Oba-chan! How did the meeting with your school friends go?”

“Oh it was great! Though we forgot about time and ended up chatting for hours. Anyway, how did it go for you two?”

“Nothing new Sachi-san.” I took all the left cups and plates to the counter.

“It was a pretty good day for me. My friend and I made plans for the summer…..”

Their voices blended into the background for me and I was back on my sea of thoughts. Reminiscing the events again.

Shaking me back to senses Sayuri-san yelled

“BACK TO EARTH! Seriously, what is it with you?”

“oh…s-sorry.”

I hesitated asking about it.

Sachi-san patted Sayuri-san’s shoulder to take over the situation.

Going behind the counter she pulled out three plates and three cups on it.

“If you have time to spare then let's talk it over a cup of coffee and cake.”

<>

Opening my mouth with the cheesecake I read the whole chapter of the date in front of them from the book of my life.

It was embarrassing and weird to tell them about everything. Of course I cut out some parts… like my unintentional glances and my sweet talking parts.

Now that everything was spilled I questioned

“So, the thing that I want to understand is… what was that?”

Sayuri-san looked at me like I asked the most obvious thing in the world. With the fork she cuts the cake in one fourth part and savours it.

When the cake went down the throat she said,

“That’s…”

“You wanted to hold her tightly, right?”

Interrupting her Sachi-san asked me as she struggled to get the words out,

“Y-yes.” That sounds embarrassing to say out loud.

“You know, that same thing happened to me once. I was in college and having a hard time with my life because of some stuff… At that time, days and nights, weekdays and weekends, festivals everyday felt the same. I was living alone at that time, the room in which I spent my night felt like a place made to suffocate me and burst open my chest.”

Even though the talk was heavy her face didn't show the same emotions maybe because what she was remembering wasn't this but the next event she told me.

“One of those days during the weekend my friends from college broke the door and entered my house. Forced me to change and took me to a mountain for hiking… Idiots right?”

Yeah pure idiots. Wait, they broke the door, right?

“My house was left wide open as an invitation to robbers,.. ah… I still remember how the landlord lectured us for hours.I had dragged them to the landlord for all the repair bills.”

“Why did they break it?”

“Apparently I was sleeping because I had a headache and they thought a depressed person plus leaving alone would do something…so they broke in after I didn't respond to their 3 knocks.”

Putting the empty cup on the table she continued,

“Anyway, they were more chaotic. I am glad it was only the door which was broken by them. What I want to tell you is that when I went out with them it was the day I enjoyed the most in that year.”

Her eyes hinted the same thing she said. Lifting her down gaze back up again she said,

“After hiking we went downhill to spend the night at an onsen and while bathing in the hot water we had a heart to heart talk. Now, I don't want to go into detail. It would be a long story if i did, …by the end of our talk i was crying out all the sorrow and pain. And I felt the same feeling as you, I wanted to hug them and not let go for even a second.”

Looking at me her words continued,

“What you are feeling can be either a feeling to want to be with them forever or a feeling to treasure them or a feeling to monopolize that person for you. What you want can only be figured out by you.”

She lifted a slice of cake with the fork and pointed it at me

“Just don't regret your choices later.” and ate it.

Wiping the cream from the corner of her lips she added,

“Even if you do, we will be here for you to give a shoulder to cry on.”

Dropping the fork on the plate, Sayuri-san showed her presence, “Oba-chan you know, you could just have told the last part and not tell us the whole story.”

“Shut up, you want dinner tonight right?” The sharp reply made me giggle.

My phone rings. The name on screen was Lemon.

I looked out of the window, the sun was already down.

“It’s Lemon” i mumbled

“Thought so, we took too much time.”

“I have to go back, sorry and Thanks for helping me.” I said as I rushed towards the changing room.

“No problem.”

“Hello, lemon. Yeah I ….”

<>

“Hey, Oba-chan. Why didn't you say it was love? It looked like it was, to me atleast.”

“We can't be sure. It was just a feeling and we can't describe them by mere words. And you only knew him for one or two weeks so you don't know how he doesn't show much of his feelings and neither know them. If I had said that he would just accept it as love not figuring it out by himself.”

“Hmm… true.”

Muttering to herself Sachi-san said “So that's why he was much livelier nowadays, uff youth.”

“Yeah, I also noticed how his expression, even if it was to be compared to dot, changes a little day by day.”

“I wish I could see him smile once again.”

“You saw him smile? I never once did since he started working.”

“Yes, his mother was my friend. He used to laugh and cry more when he was young.” With a pause she whispers “... it all changed when his mother disappeared.”

Coming out of the changing room I rushed out of cafe while saying,

“See you tomorrow, Sachi-san and Sayuri-san.”

“Yeah, take care on the way back.”

“Bye”

Just when they thought I left, I opened door once again and peaked in and said,

“Thank you both.” It hurted a bit but my smile bloomed naturally and I left.

“See, told you.”

“He should smile more,” said Sayuri-san as she watched his peerless smile.