Chapter 3

“If you could write a word about your family, what would it be?”

Kenji remembered falling asleep on his living room couch while his mother and father were playing loudly in their room.

The TV gave Kenji a lulling white noise until it finally caught a signal reception.

“Th… across… nort… sphere”

Kenji opened his eyes to see arctic wolves traversing a steep slope in a taiga.

Unlike the rest of the wolves, one fell far behind as it slipped and rose frequently.

“This wolf is sick.”

The camera cut to the wolves surrounding the sick wolf.

“To not endanger the pack, they must eat the sick.”

The camera cuts to the remains of the deceased wolf, torn apart by its pack.

Kenji was upset, so he left to cry in his bedroom.

The next day, Kenji couldn’t erase the scenes that unfolded on the TV from his mind, so he had skimmed through articles and websites using his school library’s computer.

‘...when a member grows too sick to keep its pace, the pack may turn on the wolf, sparing the others from its burden and risk of weakness it may bring.

When reading this article, Kenji accidentally clicked an external link, bringing him to a Wiki-page of a mythical wolf.

‘A young man who was born too weak was exiled from his village and sought God for strength. A great wolf known as Amarok came to him and granted him strength and wisdom. Eventually, he became strong enough to smite his old village away.’

Kenji ran home to show off his new information.

“A wolf? Ke ke…”

Haruko’s laughter would’ve caused her to fall if she wasn’t holding onto Kenji as they traversed the mushy sloped sidewalk.

Kenji’s mind wishes it would snow, so he and Haruko would be stuck doing nothing rather than reaching their destination. However, Kenji’s heart wished otherwise.

Haruko of all people would understand, Kenji thought.

They bashed their boots on the welcome mat before entering Kenji’s home.

“What’s that smell?”

Haruko’s nose wrinkled

The smell came from Kenji’s father’s sickness.

“It’s coming from his sickness? Is he alright?”

She must leave the gift on the kitchen counter.

“I want to hand this present to your father!”

Kenji’s father would make Haruko sick as well.

“I’ll wash my hands!”

It’s airborne.

“I’ll wear a mask!”

Haruko would understand.

She wrapped her scarf around her mouth as the two approached the master bedroom.

Kenji knocked on the door before turning the knob, pushing it slowly as his heart braced itself to see its creator.

Haruko steps back, the putrid smell assaulting her nose and eyes. When her vision returns, she falls on her knees. She has seen Kenji’s father.

He’s sunken into his bed, earlier juices and odors that once seeped from his body have now stained his bedsheets.

Kenji’s eyes lock onto his father’s face. His dry leathery lips have shriveled which reveal his yellow, disheveled teeth from his drinking days.

Kenji turns to the present Haruko had dropped on the floor and threw it onto the bed before slamming the door shut.

“What was that?!”

That is Kenji’s father.

“Why?!”

Kenji’s father had died.

“Why?”

Kenji’s father was sick.

“Where is your mom?”

She became sick, so Kenji’s father had eaten her.

“What?!”

Kenji still misses his mother, and he never really believed that she became sick like his father had said after cutting up his mother.

“Kenji…”

So that meant that Kenji’s father's sickness killed his mother. That’s why Kenji had to eat his father before he became sick too.

“But you didn’t have to…”

Kenji holed himself in his room when he saw his father standing over mother. He prayed for Amarok. With Amarok’s strength and wisdom, he grabbed a kitchen knife and stabbed his father.

Haruko leapt onto Kenji with wide open arms. Despite her shivering, she still gave Kenji warmth.

Haruko understands.

“I should go…”

Haruko mustn’t go.

“Let go of me!”

Haruko mustn't go.

“Kenji, we need to contact the cops!”

Then the authorities will never let Kenji feel Haruko’s warmth again.

Haruko darts down the hall as she abandons Kenji’s hold on her forearm.

She nearly slips turning the corner, allowing Kenji to grab onto her ankle.

Haruko jerks her leg, his grasp slipping off her leg sleeve.

Haruko slams the front door shut behind her while Kenji tries to stand.

She pulls her smartphone out of her coat pocket.

Kenji shoulders into the front door, nearly knocking it out of its already loose hinges.

Haruko’s footsteps reverb rapidly as she descends down the stairwell.

Her thumbs fidget with the screen as the cold increasingly seizes her finger joints.

Haruko’s sharp, arrhythmic breathing makes Kenji ache to feel her breath on his neck once again.

As soon as she reaches the apartment’s entrance, she tries shoving the dual-doors open before realizing it’s jammed shut from the mass of snow on the other side.

Kenji is gaining on her, his footsteps reaching closer make Haruko cringe.

Haruko spots a window on the other end of the room, sprinting towards it after swift consideration.

She unlocks it, struggling to push it upwards as heavy winds pound against the glass. So instead, she grabs the nearest plant holder and strikes it against the window.

The first strike fails and causes her arm to vibrate, the pain subsiding in the presence of rushing adrenaline.

The second strike is a success.

Before Haruko’s body could fully exit the window, Kenji grabs her ankle from inside.

She jerks her leg, against the windowframe, fragments of the shattered window dicing Kenji’s forearm and her shin.

He winces in pain, releasing her ankle as he covers the cut.

Haruko falls as she tries to run after standing, her blood from the gash on her shin staining the fabric of her pants

She stands again, limping as she runs through the back alley of the apartment-building.

Kenji heaves himself through the window, his heavy clothing sustaining most of the damage from the window shards.

The snow falling earlier had become more aggressive, limiting both of their visibility.

Unaware of her location, she cries for help.

Kenji doesn’t worry, since this area is mostly unpopulated.

Those who did live here were mostly unbothered with each other’s issues. That’s why Kenji’s mother’s cries for help were just a disturbance.

“Please, stop it, Kenji!”

Haruko’s wails hit Kenji’s body like a train.

Haruko would never be afraid of Kenji.

Haruko is sick.

Kenji grabs Haruko, falling onto her.

Her cries grew more animalistic as she pounds against Kenji’s chest and face.

Kenji is sad that Haruko is sick.

It’s his fault that she became sick.

Her punches grow more feeble as Haruko realizes the paltry impact it had on Kenji.

Haruko's last attempt of survival was to plead, but Kenji couldn’t hear a single word.

By looking at her sobbing face, his mind reels back to Haruko sitting underneath the Prunus tree in the school garden.

Kenji remembers and believes every word that came from Haruko.

Kenji remembers the Prunus tree striving for beauty, even in its days before its passing.

Kenji remembers why it remained beautiful until its death— for people like Haruko.

Kenji didn’t understand then, but he understands now.

Haruko must smile.

The corner of her soft lips twitches as her mouth forms into a smile. Compared to her other smiles, her eyes looked much eager today.

Kenji grabs Haruko’s neck with his healthy arm, her smile faltering momentarily before returning.

Kenji’s eyes grew weaker and soaked as he tightened his grip.

Haruko’s body jerked involuntarily underneath Kenji’s, her red face turning pale.

Kenji knows he’s being presumptuous, but he wants to ease Haruko’s pain as he cleanses her sickness.

His forehead presses onto Haruko’s as his lips reach for her lips.

Haruko’s lips are chapped and cold, but they’re also warm and alive.

Kenji rose to see Haruko, smiling before the light in her eyes dimmed to nothing.

If he could, he’d stay with the deceased Haruko until he too passed, but a commanding voice with a blinding beam of light came from behind them.

As the man’s beam of light grows closer, Kenji makes out who it truly is.

Kenji wraps his arm around Haruko’s neck once more before standing and turning tail.

The officer’s once demanding voice turned into sharp surprise.

He turns onto a steep crossing bridge above freezing waters; the sounds of wheels burning and sirens wailing grow louder behind Kenji.

His legs sting in frigid pain as he fights through thick layers of snow.

As Kenji reaches the peak of the arching bridge, a thought causes him to shiver more than he already has.

He had forgotten to write the right words for Haruko.

Kenji’s blue fingers painfully clutch and retrieve his pocket-journal.

He had also forgotten to bring a pen, so he douses his index finger with the blood on his forearm.

Kenji headlines the final paper of his pocket-journal ‘Haruko,’ then he begins to write while traversing the thick snow.

Love

Warm

Excellency

Kind

Smart

Sic-

Before Kenji can finish his final word for Haruko, his leg unexpectedly gives out, the weight of his other leg pushing him off the ledge of the bridge.

The frosty waters strip any remaining heat Kenji once had.

In his final moments, Kenji hadn’t wished to die beautifully.

Rather, he had wished for Haruko’s warmth in this flurry of icy pain.

Kenji’s body becomes numb.

Kenji is sick.

Kenji is dead.