In the Spotlight

I ended up spending almost a week in the hospital, even though I felt better after a couple of days. Kendra never told me the whole truth, but I suspect the police were trying to keep me in the hospital to transfer me to the jail at the police headquarters right down the street. The preliminary charges against Curly, Larry, Moe and Josiah, however, didn’t mention me at all.

Kendra agreed to the date I proposed to her, but warned me not to tell anyone. She also coached me about what to say when I got out of the hospital. The attempt on her life, as half-baked as it may have been despite Larry actually getting a job at City Hall to hide the gun, something I still find hard to believe, made the national news, so the local press of course jumped on it too. And they weren’t interested in the broader debate about political violence or gun control or the political climate in the country. Local news thrived on local stories and I was a local character. Kendra told me the local morning shows were already looking for my parents—I had an ok relationship with them but I didn’t see them regularly. She told me to tell them not to agree to any interviews with any journalists or reporters. They were already digging around the mutual friends I had with Josiah, Larry, Curly and Moe, but no one was talking because of the ongoing investigation.

-Why do they care so much?

-It’s a big story, that happened right here, she told me. So the local news wants to show its viewers and readers that.

-I don’t want to talk to anyone about it.

-Good. You can’t go off saying things like you didn’t want me to get hurt, if you actually do want to see me again. You know my personal life is scrutinized. Or maybe you don’t. Do you follow the news?

-Not gossip rags for sure, I responded.

-It’s the most popular form of news, always has been, and the oldest.

-That’s depressing.

-Not necessarily. People like to hear about other people, especially people they admire or know from afar, they want to feel like they’re part of their lives too.

-Politicians shouldn’t be celebrities, I said, more because I was upset about having to think about the press as I tried to get out of the hospital and return to a normal life, possibly with a date with Kendra, than out of any political commitment to a technocracy or to preventing the entertainmentization of politics, even though I believed in that too.

-That too, has always been that way.

-You should be allowed to have a private life, I protested.

-But I am silly, she said, patting me on my hand. I just have to have more discretion. Then she sat up and fixed her blouse. Besides, it’s not just about me, you don’t want all that attention from the media. They’ll move on to the next shiny thing if you don’t give them any little thread to pull on. But if you do, they’ll keep pulling until you’re unraveled.

-I can handle a little heat, I said defensively.

-Sure. Do you want them to keep pulling on threads until the police brass feel pressured to pull you back into the investigation? No one likes to be outstaged. You did something, frankly, the cops were supposed to do.

-I remember seeing one running up on Curly.

-You were faster than him, Kendra said. I thought I detected a hint of admiration, but I was probably just pumping myself up. I’m not sure how I got through the whole conversation. Do you want them to start asking why exactly you were so fast?

I was ready to object, who could possibly think if I were in fact colluding with Curly, Larry, Moe and Josiah, that part of the plan would be running up on Curly and taking a bullet? Of course that’s not what she meant.

-My hero, she said with a faint smile.

I told her what I had in mind for a first date, the largest used book store in the city and then a movie at a nearby indie theater. She laughed and dismissed it. That would be a lot too public.

-How about a picnic in the park? Center Park has some very out of the way places.

-Now you’re baking an idea, she said with a haughty laugh. You have to trust me though, okay? I’ll send Greg to pick you up when I’m ready.

It was then that I first thought about Jeff again, but I’d forget before I left the hospital.

-I’ve been here too long as it is. It’s a pretty standard visit, someone shot by my would-be assassin. To a point. Then she got up, fixed her blouse up and saw herself out.

She wasn’t wrong. There were a couple reporters waiting for me when I got discharged from the hospital a few days later.

-U! U! How does it feel to get out of the hospital?

-I feel great. The doctors and nurses and all the staff at this hospital are the best, I added. Kendra had fed me that line.

-Anything to say to the friend who shot you?

Kendra told me what to do but it was so hard to just ignore.

-I’d say that to him not to you, wouldn’t I? I said

-So he’s still your friend? Another reporter jumped in.

-That’s not what I said, I mean, you said that, I managed to answer. He said that, I said, pointing to the first reporter.

I returned to Kendra’s suggested line.

-If I’m ever ready to talk, I will, and I’ll be sure to let you know. Thanks for respecting my privacy.

And I kept walking through the door to a taxi I had called from my room.

The little exchange made the evening news. I thought I totally blew it.