The Other Side

Somewhere in our quiet stasis in the tunnel, I realized it was five minutes to midnight. We hadn’t spoken for more than fifteen minutes after the performance, we just stood by ourselves in the middle of the hallway. As we were before the show, she had her hands tucked in my pockets. Trying to keep her honest, I put my hands in there too, just to confirm they were actually cold.

We were the last performers of 2022, so no one would be coming or going until a little after midnight. I should’ve been worried if the wrong person saw this and the conclusions that they would draw about us.

“Cy, thank you,” she whispered, breaking the long period of silence.

“For what?” I said, reacting to the warmth of her breath on my ear.

“Everything you’ve done for me. I don’t know why you keep going so far.”

At first it was to give OH what they had earned, but at this point I had gone farther than that.

“I’ve always been selfish…the media was right about that. I’m just doing what I want.”

Her embrace tightened into something more than just warming up her hands.

“Are you really selfish, though? If you were as bad as you think, you would have left us to our own devices tonight…and in the studio,” she was less guarded than usual.

“Maybe,” I said exhaling. “I’m just trying to protect the right things for once.”

From our little nook in the catwalk we could hear the enormous New York crowd start their countdown from 10.

“Well, maybe I’m willing to be more open minded too,” she said, releasing her embrace.

As the number three echoed in the New York sky, I had turned to face her, our eyes locked only inches apart.

As the words ‘Happy New Year’ roared through the air, the world fell away.

Except for her

The warmth of our lips together, our eyes closed, and two secret smiles filled my heart with a warmth I’d never known.

I don’t know how many seconds passed before we separated, but it was before 12:01.

“Happy New Year, Cy, and don’t read too much into that…I still don’t know how I feel about it,” she said, embarrassed with her hands behind her back.

“Happy New Year, Kiia,” I smiled, looking for the right words. “Don’t worry about it, I know it was just the moment making decisions for you.”

We started the short walk back to the green room as far apart as ever, but with one magical hour shared between us.

***

Back in the chilly green room, the consequences of our performance had begun to take form through the quick reactions of social media users and the entertainment presses. I kept my phone on silent, knowing the deluge of headlines and links that were flooding my inbox. This was a major part of why I stopped playing shows; yes, I was a fool for trying to hide in a spotlight.

Kiia and the rest of OH had made the mistake of starting to read the headlines. It wasn’t going to be that bad for most of them, but this would be the biggest test for her.

I looked at the monitor to see the first headline written on the bottom of the screen:

Cy Rondeau Returns, But Why Here and Now?

I could only imagine the speculation from the show hosts. We were lucky we couldn’t hear the banter.

Other artists were flowing like currents through the green room. The performances were going to continue for another three hours to make it to midnight on the west coast, but most of the artists were funneling back to their hotels.

I recognized a lot of the faces in the room. Now that my tunnel vision had subsided I was seeing people rather than shapes. I had toured with a lot of them. Most of them owed Tony and I their careers for getting them a foot in the door, but none of them bothered to welcome me back. I don’t know why I expected more, it’s not like I kept in touch after the tours ended.

I turned my attention back to Kiia who was struggling to fight back tears. No one saw us kiss…I knew that, but after that performance, it was obvious that people were going to start speculating. This was my biggest fear about doing this show. A scandal like this meant nothing to me, my reputation couldn’t get much worse, but for her it was everything.

“Kiia, don’t read the speculation from the click bait and back page journals,” Nate cut in. “Just read the ones from our fans and music critics who are raving about our performance.”

“What did Rockhub have to say?” I asked, holding eye contact with him.

“Give me a second to pull it up,” Nate said, diving back to his phone.

“Ozean Horizon made their heavily anticipated major label debut tonight at the tackiest place in the world, and they were the only thing worth checking out,” he started, surprised and smiling. “They paid homage to their longtime fans by playing a killer rendition of Skeletons that was true to their debut album, a performance that only their fans would appreciate. After, they debuted a new song that the TV told us was called Curbside Dreaming. There were rumors that they were keeping creative control with the new record deal, and from the opening riff the band confirmed that they weren’t selling out.”

He paused, laughing at the next bit.

“Now, everyone knows that I’ve despised Cy Rondeau since he left BTR, and I was lamenting his inclusion and attachment to the major label version of Ozean Horizon. However, I’ve gained some respect for him after tonight. A collaboration between these two artists was my worst nightmare, but I was pleased to hear that he deeply understood how to augment the OH sound as a musician and that he became an enhancement to the incredible Kiia Salo on stage. If this is only the beginning of the next era of OH, I’m obsessed with their potential to become the biggest rock band on Earth,” he paused once more. “With love, Jack Willis, Rockhub.”

“Wow,” I said. “I can’t believe he said something nice about me.”

Kiia was smiling through her tears on the couch in the green room.

“Your beef with Jack has been going on since, what, 2015?” Hank asked.

“Yeah,” I laughed. “Technically, it started before that, but he didn’t have a platform to give me a hard time until then.”

“Did he ever explain why?” Nate asked.

“I think it had something to do with our first interview in 2013. He didn’t like BTR, and we just had an awful conversation about it,” I paused. “It’s like he wanted me to apologize for our success at the time and admit that we didn’t deserve to be where we were.”

“Even though he’s always disliked me, I’m a big fan of his. I always read his reviews of new albums and shows because he’s one of the only honest guys in the business. He doesn’t rely on clickbait or lying about bands being good to get in with labels…I usually leak him some of my artists’ new stuff without him knowing it’s me to see if it’s actually good.”

Kiia’s tears started to subside from the absurdity of my ranting.

I saw the title of the article she was reading as she tipped her phone forward from laughing.

Kiia Salo and Cy Rondeau?! Tara McGovern Tells All

After all these years she was still bitter, I guess. The headline told the whole story. Within an hour of her former protege reaching a height she only ever dreamed about, Tara decided to use Kiia and her ex to get back into the spotlight…If anyone doubted she was washed by her 1,000 capacity club tour this year, spewing gossip to a backpage website was final nail in her c-tier celebrity coffin.

“Tara McGovern?” Nate said, also reading her phone. “I haven’t heard that name in forever. Didn’t some guy cheat on her with her sister or something?”

“Yeah, I vaguely remember that,” Hank said. “I forgot she even existed. We used to be so close with her, but after that whole thing she went nuts, and it basically killed her career.”

I had never heard that before.

Kiia was fully laughing by the time she reached the end of the article.

“Anything good in there?” I prodded.

“Not really. It’s just an exposé about her feeling betrayed. How could an old friend collaborate with my ex after he hurt me? Type energy.”

“Oh, God, I forgot you were the guy who was dating her,” Nate said, embarrassed.

“It’s fine, the fact that you forgot made me feel better.”

“I don’t mean to be that guy, but after reading all of the lascivious headlines, you two might need to clarify your relationship sooner or later,” Hank cut in.

He was right, but not in the way he meant.