Gimme My Body Back!

Nyle appeared before the heroes once they fell asleep.

“Hey~!” he said, tossing up a peace sign.

“—Nyle?” said Kanie, surprised to see him. “What gives?”

He looked around; it was the same neon-lit location he woke up in after dying back on Earth.

“Oh, nothing~,” Nyle replied cheerfully. “I just thought I’d check up on you guys, that’s all!”

Kanie tilted his head, confused.

“‘You guys?’” he asked.

He looked over to his right, and to his surprise, Eric was sitting next to him.

“Eric?” he said. “Hold on a second. You’re back in your old body. But wait—that means…!”

Kanie scrambled to find something with a reflective surface. He checked his pockets and found something. —It was the gold, heart-shaped locket Nyle had given him earlier.

“… Oh, my, GOD!” he freaked. “I’m piece of shit me again!”

“Hahaha~! Oh, Kanie. You’re a comic genius,” Nyle said, cracking up.

“Nyle! Gimme my body back!” Kanie said frantically. “I want my hero body back!”

“Now, now, don’t wet yourself there,” Nyle replied, sticking his tongue out slightly. “This is only temporary, you see.”

“Temporary?” Eric asked.

“Yes,” Nyle said. “I overheard that you two are planning on taking on a quest to test your powers.”

“Woah, woah, wait… You overheard?” said Kanie. “You were watching us?”

“Oh, I’m always watching,” Nyle replied, smirking. “Have you forgotten already? I’m God, motherfucker.”

“A~nyways,” he continued. “I wanted to give you a bit of a tip. Tomorrow, when you go to pick a quest, pick the one where you have to exterminate Fire Salamanders on Rogus Path.”

“That’s awfully specific,” Eric said. “Is there any reason in particular you want us to take that quest?”

“There is,” said Nyle. “If you do, you’ll meet the one known as ‘Kimora.’”

Kanie looked at him.

“Kimora? Who’s that?” he asked.

Nyle took a sip of his ice coffee.

“You’ll find out soon enough,” he replied, smiling. “I’m not big on spoiling plot points. Didn’t I tell you? I’m a god, not a dick.”

“And why should we trust you?” asked Eric, skeptical. “You could be setting us up just for your own amusement.”

“Hahaha~! That’s mean, you know~!” Nyle teased. “I’ll have you know, though…”

Eric and Kanie flailed about as their bodies started to float in the air.

“I’ve never once told a lie,” he said. “There’s no need to when you’re all-powerful.”

“Now then,” he continued, gently lowering them back toward the ground. “I have one more piece of advice for the two of you, so listen well.”

“Do you remember seeing a little icon in front of you to your left when you got to Jandariu?”

Kanie and Eric’s eyes lit up.

“… Yeah,” said Eric. “Kanie and I decided against touching it because we didn’t know what would happen.”

“Yeah, we didn’t want to blow ourselves up by accident,” Kanie added. “We were like, ‘What if this is some kind of self-destruct button,’ you know?”

Nyle facepalmed.

“I sent you guys there to save the place. Why the hell would I add a self-destruct button? Idiots.”

“No,” he said. “That activates an HUD feature. Press it, and you’ll permanently see your health, magic supply, and more. It’s almost like a game, right~?”

In the end, our lives are nothing but a game to this guy, huh? thought Kanie, eyebrow twitching.

“One last thing,” said Nyle.

“There’s still more?” Eric asked.

“Once the HUD activates, you’ll see an icon with a wand on it in the bottom center of your vision field. It will bring up a list of all spells you can use. You cast a spell by saying its name.”

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Nyle asked, noticing the silence.

Kanie and Eric were busy spacing out.

“So much information,” Eric said. “Is there any way you can write this all down or something for us?”

Nyle sighed.

“I’ll send this as a message to the locket I gave you, but remember—” he said. “This is a one-time exception, since you’re still green. I’m a god, you see—”

“—Not a dick,” said Kanie and Eric in harmony.

“Hahaha! Well, as long as you know,” Nyle said with a grin.

His bright expression turned neutral.

“… Our time’s just about up,” he said to them. “As promised, what we discussed will show up as a message on the locket I gave you. Do be sure to check it, won’t you?”

Kanie and Eric could feel their consciousness pulling away from Nyle.

“Hey, Nyle!” Kanie called out.

“Thanks for helping us,” he said to the god.

Nyle smiled.

“Oh, don’t think of it as help,” he said. He took another sip of his ice coffee.

“… I’m simply acting as a fuse so this story can unfold.”