Old wounds, re-opened

"It was 4 years ago, when you were 13, that's the day that changed everything for your father and yourself. It's a day I wish to forget, but this conversation is long overdue." Mom exclaimed, clearly still struggling to accept what happened to Dad and me on that fateful day.

Mom continued,

"It all started in December. You had a bustling career as an upcoming child star in the entertainment industry, and your father was a well-renowned (at the time) Director. You two had prosperous futures ahead of you, and you were going to make it big in the entertainment industry. Everyone wanted you to be part of their agency, and you were truly incredible. That's where you first met Fujisawa-chan, at a talent agency, your father used to hire actors from for his Films. She was always the centre of attention; people even claimed her to be a child prodigy of the acting world. Her voice and acting brought hope to a lot of people. Your father took notice of her and hired her for the child version of the female lead for his upcoming film," The One Without You." A story about young love. Your dad wanted you to play the male counterpart, as he felt it would make for a good dynamic. Due to this, you and Fujisawa-chan used to spend lots of time with each other. She was always the louder one amongst the two of you, giving her all when you were rehearsing. You, on the other hand, were a real piece of work. Fujisawa often had to help you with your lines, as you used to forget them all; you were a real klutz back then, Tatsumi."

"Back then.. I was a child actor?" I repeated in disbelief

I couldn't believe what my ears were perceiving. The pieces started to fall into place about why Fujisawa-san was acting so familiar towards me.

"Mom, I understand I have history with Fujisawa-san, but what does that have to do with Dad's death?" I asked, listening intently for what Mom had to say next.

"Well, after your time with her on "The One Without You", you and Fujisawa-chan were inseparable, you did everything together, and she was often the one taking care of you when you needed it, you really became each other's rocks. Thats when the incident occurred...

My throat started to feel tight, anticipating what Mom had to say next.

"Your father, or rather Ryusuke, came to pick you and Fujisawa-chan up on a rainy Christmas Eve, to go to the premiere of his new movie, Love is Euphoria. On the way to the venue, a drunk driver hit Ryusuke's car head-on. The car was impaled in an instant, killing Ryusuke on the spot. You, was sitting in the passenger seat next to Ryusuke, blood painted your body red. What a horrific sight. Luckily, Fujisawa-chan only had a few broken bones and managed to get ahold of the cops and emergency services. Ryusuke was pronounced dead at the scene, and you were rushed to the hospital, desperately fighting back death. Then, blank...."Mom uttered, desperately holding back tears.

"When you awoke, that's when this game of pretend and lies started. While you were comatose, the doctors discovered that your Cerebral cortex, due to the trauma of the horrific event, had reverted a year; all of your memories of Fujisawa, taken away from you just like that." Mom muttered in an apologetic tone.

I couldnt believe it, after all the horrible things I said to her hours before, who knew we had been this close? It was all too much for me to comprehend at that moment. All I could do was begin to cry at how selfish and self-centred I had been acting. The sky cried hard that night, and I cried hard along with it. After that, Mom explained how, while I was hospitalized, Fujisawa came to see me almost every day. Looking back, she was probably the one keeping me going during that lonely period of my life, in a world surrounded by darkness; she must have been my guiding light.

The question now was, how do I go about this? Should I tell Fujisawa-san that I had finally become aware of our shared trauma? That night, my whole perspective on Fujisawa-san as I knew it up to that point changed. I saw her in a totally new light; she was the one who saw me when no one else did, and to throw it back in her face as I did was wrong. This feeling of regret and sorrow washed over me. I needed to apologize the next time I saw her for how awful I had been treating her. I decided to sleep on it for today and went to bed.

The next day couldn't come fast enough. I was awaiting Fujisawa-san's arrival at school, but that day, she never did turn up at school. I must have really messed up big time, huh? To think I finally got the courage to approach her myself, guess it hurt her more than I thought. That night, after school, I decided to ask Mom if she knew where Fujisawa-san lived.

"Mom, I have a question, it's about Fujisawa-san. Do you possibly know where she lives? "I exclaimed, looking desperate.

"I think I remember, why?" she stated with a smug look on her face, clearly knowing something was up.

"Its kinda a personal matter, I'll tell you everything when I get back." I expressed.

"Last I got told she lived by the convenience store about 2 blocks from here, y'know by Johnnys?" Mom replied.

I smiled and headed toward the door, just then I turned to Mom and rembered i had something I wanted to ask her.

"Oh, Mom, I forgot to ask, why did you never tell me before, y'know, about Fujisawa-san and dad?" I exclaimed,

"I was scared you'd change if you knew the truth about how Ryusuke died. I was afraid you'd blame yourself for what happened... and that I'd lose you to-Tatsumi. As for Fujisawa-chan, I simply wanted to wait till she approached you herself before spilling the beans to you."

As I heard those words, a wave of courage started to form within me. I was going to tell Fujisawa-san the truth.

As I made the heart-pounding walk to her house, I was trying to figure out what to do when I got there. Do I shout her name? No, that's too creepy, and I'd disturb other residents. What if I knock on the door? Too direct? After pondering this for a while, I just decided to ring the doorbell, as that seemed like the most respectful thing to do.

I finally made it to the address of Fujisawa-san, my heart practically beating out of my chest. It was all or nothing; reluctantly, I went to press the doorbell. As my finger is about a centimetre away from pressing the doorbell and possibly the catalyst to start a new me, I hear a voice behind me.

"Tat- I mean Kyoshiro-kun, that you?"?...

Crap, it was Fujisawa-san!