Somatic Delusions pt 2

“Beep, beep, beep , boop!” the child poked the medical machinery with his toes, wiggling them back and forth between each electronic blip. His arms were both heavily casted and bent at the elbow, a clear sign that the bones had been set.

“Can you tell me again about how your child was injured sir?” Mond’s Father clicked the heels of his shoes nervously, looking back at his son who was attempting to press the buttons of a nearby vending machine with his nose, due to his restrained limbs. “I.. he told me he opened the door in this sleep on accident, of our car I mean” Mond's father straightened up his back as he spoke, a futile attempt to hide his anxiety. “But the kicker was that by the time I had gotten the car pulled over and made my way over to where he had landed, “ he laughed to himself under his breath, adjusting the glasses on his face, “Kid made his way with through the woods and started climbing, when I finally caught up with him, I was only in time to see him land in a huge snowdrift thank God”.

The Fathers lenses darkened as he looked to the ground, his saddened smile showing the complex emotional war waging in his heart. “ To be honest, It took me at least a solid second or two to realize what had happened when he opened the car door. I'm so… so glad he’s okay.” Looking up to his son who was chatting away with a nurse, something about how cats that live in cacti, and it brightened his dark smile to the slightest degree. “But to be honest doc, I don't think I’ll ever get over the fact I didn’t make it in time to catch him.

Distortion of perception, mild delusions, reactions to things that weren't there, the quirks of Mond's life became more and more evident as he grew up. What was once seen as childhood whimsy became more and more worrying to his family and friends, and the difficulties it brought eventually were too much for even himself to ignore.

“Hello? Hello? Earth to bozo!” on a warm July evening, Mond's buddy would call to him one late summer afternoon, hands full of pool tubes and towels. The steaming asphalt burnt his heels, but he knelt unfazed, swiping his hands frantically across the empty air. When he was younger, the cats he saw would run free through his mind, and he could pick them up and feel their frost tinged grey fur. When he was in his teenage years however, they only seemed to appear in dangerous situations, and became slippery in his arms, mewling for assistance he could never seem to render.

“Just- just hold on one minute…” He’d mutter, embarrassed and knowing more and more the reality of his inimical efforts, but nonetheless compelled by the instinct in his heart, the sickening twist of misplaced responsibility. “Just.. I'll feel better if I can just do this thing-”. He was looking up at the sky, why? And why did his head hurt?

Mond’s signature up the casted leg of his friend ended with a sloppily drawn butterfly. A pandering chorus of “Awws” filled the school courtyard as he rose to his feet, “Um.. thanks dude, again.” “Dont mention it man, you’d have done the same” He gave Mond a pat on the back as he left, followed by a chatty entourage and leaving Mond with only his own heartbeat in his ears. It was childish, it was demanding, it was selfish and unthankful and flat out immature, but no matter how much he tried to contain his feelings, Mond hated his friend for saving him from that truck. He never, ever wanted to hear that pandering tone again he’d known would eventually find its way into his life. His fist tightened as his eyes welled with tears, and frosted grey kittens licked them away.

But now Mond had gotten himself hurt instead, a fact that bounded around in his mind as he sat upright in his hospital bed. A fact he knew was probably a psychologically bad sign, like responding when you talk to one’s self, but nevertheless felt a hint of pride in. He didn’t need saving this time, he’d gotten himself into a deluded, pitiable situation sure, but there was no one to pity him here, and that made him feel better.

“Excuse me, sir? Your paperwork is all worked out and you’re free to go!” a tall nurse with long black hair, politely let him know, speaking slightly louder than Mond thought she meant too, clearly very busy. Making his way alone through the hospital lobby, careful to walk straight on his injured ankles, he thanked his lucky stars there were no questions on his citizenship. Something he found odd of course but he wasn’t one to look a gift horse too closely in the jaws.

Every muscle in his body cringed in a single moment however when Doctor Mahou came running out into the parking lot, calling his name, “Oh Oh Mr.Mond, please wait a moment-”. His already stained coat became rimmed with black grime as he ran through a freshly formed rainpuddle, Mond noticing for the first time its slightly oversized nature. He wondered for a second if he should try and make a break for it, in case he’d celebrated too soon on the citizenship thing, but decided against it given his injured feet and admittedly foolish nature of the thought even for him.

Catching his breath, Mahou adjusted his oddly shaped glasses and held out a small bottle of medication of some sort, “I forgot-” he cleared his throat as his resumed a semi-professional posture, “I forgot to give you these, just for pain, take em once a day around midnight alright?” He handed them off in a swift motion, turning to leave once again through the puddle, hands in coat pocket. He stopped once, and turned his head back with a flustered smile, running his hand through his unkempt black hair, “Ya know, if you feel you wanna!”.

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“Come on, open ya stupid…” Mond slammed his body sideways into his second story apartment door, the sound of his shoves in the attempt to wedge open the tightly stuck hinges drowned out by the violent hum of aging fluorescent lights fighting off death. “There!” he spilled out of the outside dark onto the floor of his cozily dim apartment, spilling the bottle of pills he’d been giving all over the red wooden floors, “ah… nice” he moaned.

The door shut and locked, pills cleaned up, placing one on the counter, Mond finally got to plop himself down on the small dusty couch he called his bed. He hadn't even gotten used to sleeping on the futon he’d bought for himself when he moved to Japan, instead just getting into the habit of couch sleeping, oddly feeling more natural to him. It was something he could do in his own space, and no one could tell him otherwise, one of the small things that made his life here worth the effort. In fact his whole small apartment reflected that, the clean carpets and counter paralleled by the seemingly random nature of furniture placement, multiple lamps in odd corners and a TV that sat on the floor rather than a tabletop. It's what felt right, what made it home.

Flicking on the television to a purely commercial channel, one he’d always found soothing late at night, Mond found it oddly amusing how tired he was despite spending the last 24 hours or so unconscious. He knew enough Japanese at this point to understand what he heard as he let his eyelids slowly grow heavier , something about chocolate covered rain. “Nah, wait that cant be it-”, his mind lazily rolled around the word he’d miss translated, the exercise bringing sleep even faster, until another thought caused him to jolt into the waking world once more.

“Oh crap, wait the medicine, Doctor Moai or whatever his name was said I gotta take it around midnight.” He let his arm dangle off the side of the sofa, dreading having to get up. “Well, he did say I only gotta take it if I wanna…” He eyed the lone pill on his counter for a moment, contemplating the thought, he’d hate to wake up in the middle of the night in dull pain. “Eh, oh well” and he let himself drift off to sleep.