Chained and Burdened

‘I GOTTA POOP,’ thought Ryuuji, fighting a losing battle against the call of nature. Hotaru and Akari had dragged him around the whole day, and there were some things he just couldn’t run away from.

“I’m sorry ladies, but I’ll be right back,” he let go of them, feeling like a douchebag as he stood up from the bench. The stares of judgment from the onlookers didn’t help.

“Take your time,” said Hotaru, all smiles.

Then, as soon as Ryuuji was out of sight, she turned to face Akari.

“So, Akari-chan, for how long have you liked Ryuuji?”

“Eeeeh!?” she recoiled, taken off-guard by Hotaru’s forwardness. “Hold on, wait. It’s not like I… You know…”

“Don’t play silly, I know a maiden in love when I see one.”

Akari’s face was burning up.

“So. When did you fall for him?”

“Um.... Don’t laugh, okay?”

“I won’t.”

“Since I was little…”

“Fufu, that makes two of us. He leaves a strong impression, doesn’t he?”

“Yeah. He does.”

The poor girl didn’t know how to face her new friend.

“Um… doesn’t it bother you?” she had to ask, wondering why in the world Hotaru had pushed her to make a move on Ryuuji earlier.

“Not at all. I think you’d be a great partner for him.”

“Oh, um… I’m flattered, but aren’t you dating him right now?”

“I am.”

“So why are you telling me this? Do you, uh… like it that way?”

Hotaru turned her gaze to the shrine next to them, taking a moment to reply.

“I don’t want him to be alone after I’m gone.”

Her voice was firm but wistful, like she was staring at an inevitable end.

“What do you mean?” Akari pressed her.

“There’s something important I haven’t told him. And seeing that you’re my most likely successor in love, I’d like to entrust him to you.”

Akari’s face hardened upon listening to her words. Hotaru was filled with such grim determination, it was clear she didn’t expect to live for long.

“Hotaru-san, please be honest with me. Why are you saying that?”

Nothing seemed strange with her at a glance, so Akari couldn’t fathom.

“Do you remember about Reigetsu and how he cleansed my corruption?”

Akari nodded, eyes firm on her.

“He couldn’t purify all of it. A part of the taint was embedded too deeply in me, and the only option we had was to seal it. We used what’s called a Vow of Atonement; it’s a spell that lets you seal a curse away in exchange for a promise. In my case, I vowed to cleanse as much corruption as I created that day.”

“But wasn’t it the miasma at fault?”

“At the start, it was. But then I took the corruption to myself and succumbed to it. After that, I caused an earthquake… and tens of thousands died from it.”

The Voice of Ruin.

Even those who’d never heard of Kisaragi Hotaru knew her title nonetheless. She had caused untold devastation in Tokyo and accrued a number of sins that she couldn’t fully wash away.

“But you saved so many of us too…” said Akari. To her knowledge, back when Hotaru intervened, the miasma incident was completely out of control. If she hadn’t absorbed all of it at the time, Japan would’ve been overwhelmed and suffered much more dire consequences.

“Maybe I did, but the fact remains that I caused a terrible calamity myself. The contract I made with Reigetsu doesn’t differentiate right from wrong; all that matters is that I abide by its terms.”

“So that’s why you traveled all over Japan, purifying corruption everywhere…”

“Yes. It isn’t from the goodness of my heart; I’m bound to it.”

Hotaru lowered her gaze as she elaborated.

“There’s a time limit to my contract, Akari. I had ten years to fulfill its terms, and I’m not even halfway done. The seal will break four years from now, and well… you can do the math.”

If she continued purifying corruption at the same rate, she wouldn’t make it.

“So this Obon Festival is your best shot,” Akari concluded.

“Exactly.”

Hotaru’s face darkened.

“It’s sick, isn’t it? I need a terrible calamity to save myself. If a disaster happens here, and I manage to purify the taint that spawns from it, I’d be able to stay alive. I’d be able to stay human next to Ryuuji, and grow old together and have kids. All I’d need to do would be to stay sitting right here and clean up the mess when it does happen.”

She had an incentive to let the Red Thread cause a mass contamination event. Akari shuddered as she realized it, but Hotaru shook her head in turn.

“There’s no way I could do that. I could never face Ryuuji, or you, or even myself if I let a disaster like that happen without doing everything to stop it. So, I’ll put an end to the Red Thread’s plans… even if I must let my seal expire for it.”

Akari was stunned by her words.

The woman before her, with all the overwhelming power she had at her disposal, was nonetheless willing to give up her humanity for the common good. She was willing to abandon everyone and everything she loved, all to protect people she didn’t know.

“If the seal breaks, and you are corrupted again… What would happen then?”

“Reigetsu would kill me. We agreed to it. It would be the right thing to do.”

If Hotaru turned into the Voice of Ruin again, her Kotodama would plunge the world into an age of darkness. Such a catastrophe could not be allowed, not by her and not by Reigetsu. If it came down to it, she would rather die by his hand.

Akari also understood this, and tears fell from her eyes as she stared at Hotaru.

“That’s why I’d like you to stay in love with Ryuuji. I want him to notice you and love you back, because when the day comes that I’m no longer here... he will need you by his side. More so than ever.”

“Hotaru-san…” Akari eked out, overcome with emotions.

“Oh, and I’m sorry about this morning. I got caught up in the moment last night, and well… it was an indiscretion from my part. Now that I know you’re here, I’ll take it easy. I wouldn’t want to make things awkward for you.”

Hotaru scratched her head awkwardly at the end, until Akari burst at her.

“Don’t screw with me! And what about your happiness, Hotaru-san? What about your hopes, your dreams? Don’t come telling me you’re completely selfless, that you’re happy throwing everything away and giving him to me. Fight for yourself, damn it! You’re strong as hell; stronger than anyone I’ve ever seen. If there’s anyone who can turn this around, it’s you! It’s you, Hotaru-san!”

“Don’t mind us, don’t mind us…” said Hotaru, turning the onlookers’ attention away from them with her power.

“See? If you can do that, then you can save yourself too. Even if it doesn’t work during the Obon Festival, what of it? You have four years left, and you’ve got me and Ryuuji now. No matter what happens, I will not let you die. You hear me? You’re precious to me, and we’re pulling through together. So promise me you won’t give up. Promise me!”

Akari poured her heart and soul out, but Hotaru remained unfazed.

Just what manner of determination did this woman have?

“I’m sorry, Akari. If push comes to shove, the one who’s going down is me. I won’t let anyone else bear the brunt of my curses again.”

“Hotaru-san!” Akari yelled, grabbing her yukata by the collar. But before she could say anything else, Hotaru signaled with her eyes to look behind her.

“Whoa! What’s going on?” came Ryuuji’s voice, quickly stepping in.

Faced with his arrival, Akari let go of her. Then, with her chest aching with emotions, she turned away from them and wordlessly walked off on her own.

“What happened?” Ryuuji asked, utterly confused about the exchange. He couldn’t imagine Akari picking a fight out of nowhere.

“Oh, just girl talk. Think nothing of it,” Hotaru replied with a blatant lie… and as her words reverberated with power, Ryuuji nodded and put the matter to rest.