Fans Will Do Anything For Concert Tickets

“Nice to meet you, you said your name was Haruto?”

“He’s a friend of my brother.”

“Your brother doesn’t have any friends, only acquaintances.”

“Yes, he does. Haruto has been traveling around the world looking for the arch monster that killed my father.”

Hyottoko in black clothes and a ski mask nodded. He had used a transformation spell to give his head a human appearance, but he still wore the mask because he said it helped him get into character.

“He just arrived today, and said he has a lead but he needs more information on Kei’s friend Dr. Kawaguchi.”

“Yes I just arrived, thank you for watching over my friend and her sister.”

Hyottoko shook Meika’s hand profusely.

“Oh uh yeah you’re welcome.”

She dropped his hand, and changed the subject.

“Why can’t you just ask Dr. Kawaguchi. I mean all for breaking in, but not if we don’t have too.”

Gunji Meika wasn’t dressed in black. She was doing some stretches in regular clothes, jeans and a cropped shirt from her favorite idol-group. She wore a light jacket and sneakers.

“Because we think that she may be working with the arch-monster.”

I was yawning, also wearing a ski mask and black clothing.

“The arch monster is hunting other monsters and hunters, and in return for her information Dr. Kawaguchi receives S rank relics.”

“Wow I didn’t know Dr. Kawaguchi was so underhanded, she seemed like a goody-goody.”

I didn’t feel good about lying to my best friend. It made me feel no better than my brother. If Meika knew that Haruto was actually the S rank arch monster that made a fool of her during the rank evaluation, she would’ve never agreed. Unfortunately, I needed both of their help with this.

“In the files I got about my father, Dr. Kawaguchi was the only person besides my father and brother on the hunting trip where he went missing. Isn’t that suspicious?”

“That is weird, you think Dr. Kawaguchi got your father alone to kill him?”

Now I was just thinking on the spot.

“I don’t think it’s that sinister. I think that trip is where they made the deal, so that the monster wouldn’t kill Dr. Kawaguchi and Kei?”

Meika agreed with me and she went on to stretching her legs.

“I’ve heard that you can make deals with arch monsters. There’s a hot spring that gives offerings to a heat monster in exchange for keeping their pools going.”

“I’ve heard of that too.”

I hadn’t.

“That deal is why Kei is so guilty that he can’t leave the house. My father’s body was never found, so maybe the monster took my father, or at the very least, I’ll know how he died.”

Meika nodded.

“That’s good enough for me. Anything for my bestie. But you’re buying me tickets to the next WhitePurple concert.”

“Deal.”

I did enjoy WhitePurple, those girls could sing. Hyottoko put his hand up.

“I want to go too!”

“Haruto, if we pull this off, we’ll all go.”

Hyottoko or Haruto squealed in delight and launched into some cutesy idol poses, he finished with his hands forming a little heart.

“Where did you say your brother met this guy.”

“I don’t know, online? My brother’s a weirdo, his friends are weirdos too. He’s just as talented as Kei. He’s got a transformation essence that’s going to help us get inside.”

That was the alias we had come up with. Hyottoko had vowed not to use any of his other spells, or nonsense. If it started making jokes while undercover it was going to be all over for us.

“Could you go over the plan, one more time?”

“Haruto is going to transform us, then we will crawl through the boarded-up hole in the side of the building that the monsters made during their escape yesterday.”

We were now walking along the city walls, keeping to the shadows. Approaching the building from the back.

There was security in the lobby and cameras, but there weren’t any guards outside. Hunters stationed at the top in case of aerial monsters, but there weren’t many attacks this far into the city. There also wasn’t much of desire inside the building, some relics and monsters they were trying to domesticate. During the day it was a large hub of the strongest hunters in Japan, that was its biggest defense.

“Once we get into the stairwell, Meika you’ll go down into the basement where the archives are and find anything you can labeled Kawaguchi. Family members, men or women I don’t care as long it says Kawaguchi.”

“Roger chief!”

“Haruto and I will try to break into the research lab and Dr. Kawaguchi’s office.

I had no idea if there was a locked file drawer or something, but I was hoping there was something in her office of use.

“Got it.”

“In thirty minutes, we’ll meet back at the stairwell and Haruto will help us escape.”

They both nodded.

“Alright, Haruto whenever you’re ready.”

We were standing outside of the building. The essence began clumping around Hyottoko and he mumbled words under his breath.

“TRANSFORM”

He moved his hands like he was chanting but it wasn’t a real chant. He was a monster after all, they had the same number of spells as us, but had no need to vocalize it or manipulate it through chants.

I could feel myself getting smaller, my clothes wrapping up to become fur. I looked over at Meika, She had turned into a purple mouse, Hyottoko was red. I looked down and saw that I was soft shade of pink.

“Kik-kik, kiki kik-kik.”

I folded my little mouse arms. We were supposed to be regular mice. The red mouse laughed a little bit, and shrugged his little mouse shoulders. The purple mouse shrugged too, then gestured for us to follow.

There were monsters shaped as mice nowadays, it wouldn’t be that crazy to see colored mice. As long as President Sukimoto didn’t step on us. I was just mad, Hyottoko couldn't resist a joke.

-

In the stairwell, we emerged as humans. Meika took a breath but then began softly chanting, it was her third chant.

“CAT-SUIT”

The essence clumped and she covered herself in a shadowy veil. It covered up her regular clothes and her face. She merged into the shadows as her essence allowed her to go unseen. She flexed her claws that would let her climb and cling to surfaces. It would be hard to see her and catch her while this chant was going.

“See you all in thirty minutes.”

She gave a little bow, and merged into the shadows as she went downstairs. Hyottoko began to give her a little clap, but I swatted his hands away.

“Shhh we don’t have time, let’s go.”

“It was quite the trick, but yeah let’s go rob this place.”

I still felt bad about all this, especially when said so plainly, but I nodded.

The MaMA was pretty abandoned at this time of night. We didn’t see anyone as we made our way up the floor with the research lab. The plan was if we could see the people without them seeing us, I would petrify them. And if they did see us, Hyottoko would transform us and we would run or hide.

-

“They got a bunch of great stuff in here!”

Hyottoko was looking around at some of the relics they had out, I was trying to go through the notes on people’s desks. He had easily snuck underneath the research lab’s door and opened it from the inside.

“Feel free to take some, I know that’s kind of your thing.”

“What do you mean?”

Hyottoko was juggling three of the relics as he looked at me.

“You go around stealing relics from under people’s noses. Take a few it may set them off my track.”

“I don’t need relics.”

“Then when do you go around taking them. You’re wanted in like five cities!”

“I was looking for s class monsters.”

“You still stole that fork right from under us.”

“Well, I mean it is fun.”

He tossed one behind his back and caught it between his legs.

“They are fun toys, I thought they might be good presents for when I find my family.”

“Monsters don’t have family, Hyottoko. I’m sorry, everybody knows you all just manifest out of essence.”

“No jokes are only funny when people relate to you and when other people laugh. Otherwise it’s not a joke, that’s just prank and that’s a whole different essence. So I have to have a family, to laugh with me and get my jokes. Okame gets my jokes so she's family.”

Kei said arch-monsters had more intelligence, but it just meant they were more complicated. Even if we we're fighting, Kei still got my sense of humor. I had bigger problems than finding someone to laugh with. I had now opened Dr. Kawaguchi’s office, and was rummaging through her desk drawers.

“Look I’m glad you found your little sidekick, but can you keep looking.”

“Sure Sidekick!”

“I’m not your sidekick! If anything, your mine.”

Our whispering was getting louder, but there still wasn’t any activity in the hallway.

“Then who are you talking about, Okame isn’t my sidekick she’s my little sister.”

“Whatever!”

We were getting nowhere. Lady Doctor Kawaguchi didn’t have anything of importance in her drawers. It was a list of relics that came in in the last month, but none s rank and none from an arch monster. There weren’t any locked drawers or safe. 

Maybe there was a secret relic facility, but Kei hadn’t mentioned that. I should ask him; he didn’t have any right to hide anything from me anymore. Even government secrets, he’d have to tell me.

“That’s twenty minutes down Rei!”

Hyottoko was holding up an alarm clock. Then he tucked it back into his clothes pocket somehow.

“Fine give me a second and let’s get out of here.”

I looked at the desk and across the paperweights and items. Trying to figure out what had been there the longest. I wasn’t leaving empty handed after breaking-in. I grabbed a snow globe of Tokyo, and a picture frame of Dr. Kawaguchi and her brother at his graduation.

“Alright let’s go.”