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◆ Yukiteru

“symptoms of romantic love”

The moment Search is hit, thousands of results appear on the screen. I read through the list.

“intense focus, prioritizing their happiness, feeling safe and open, enjoying shared experiences, feeling proud of them, craving closeness, seeing a future together, and integrating your lives, marked by deep empathy where their joy is yours and their pain is your pain, often accompanied by a sense of "home" and excitement.”

These are the symptoms, then?

I sigh. It seems that I am in love with Tsukasa Aishi—correction: have been since a long time.

Except for the empathy, but that I have accepted that I will never have.

“Feeling safe and open…?” I rethink our conversations. Every time, I felt like I could talk to her about anything. With Enomoto, his intellectual level is too low to comprehend anything I say without heavy IQ ceiling lowering. But Aishi… she understands. She smiles. She sits through our discussions without ever seeming bored or trying to be polite. Appreciation for my person comes naturally to her. Maybe… could she feel the same way?

No. Love is fleeting. If she had ever loved me… would it have passed the test of time?

I recall the New York incident. She killed those four delinquents. Because they hurt me. And then, still with blood on her cheeks, eyes glistening and pink, she held my hand and promised me forever. After that day… I believe it was that day I fell hopelessly in love with her.

Because she has demonstrated all emotions applicable to my research. Because she has promised to never turn on me. Unlike she did.

“Lie. It is in your surname. Fitting. You were never my son. You are a disgraced bastard that took everything I loved. That poisons everything you touch. I pity the woman that loves you.”

Mama… you mustn’t pity Tsukasa Aishi.

For she is much stronger than you think.

And when she is with me, I fear no separation.

***

Back at school, I finish my background check on Mikado Saotome. Constant flawless grades, close to my own. A long career in school soccer, having even been called to the sub-14 national championship to represent Chiba Prefecture. No suspensions. A clean record, in other words.

This is troublesome. If he begins to pursue Aishi, I will be forced to remove him. And I would rather have him become someone that shapes this country for the better than another liability in my research.

Aishi appears, holding a laptop. “Senpai, Shijō-kun asked me to show you this.”

I gently pick it up from her hands and examine it.

It’s a news headline.

Shinkō Academy School Nurse Arrested for Antipsychotics Trafficking

Mikan Mochizuki (40) found with large amounts of haloperidol and aripiprazole that were reported missing from the shelves of her office. Burner phones were also found containing conversations regarding transactions of the drugs to multiple anonymous accounts.

“Mochizuki-san from the infirmary… was trafficking antipsychotics?” I raise my eyebrows. “I… actually had noticed her walking out with meds. But I never thought she was smuggling them out of the school, let alone selling them.”

“Yeah, me too,” Aishi says. “She used to be a friend of my mom’s, you know. From their high school days.”

We are silent for a moment. Finally she says:

“I got confessed to today, you know.”

I blink.

What?

“What do you mean?” I ask. “By whom?”

“One of your classmates… Fujii, I think was his name,” Aishi says, tilting her head exactly 12.0 degrees, a finger on her chin. “He said he’s been in love with me since I entered the school. I rejected him, though.” She smiles to herself. “After all, there’s someone I like, and it’s not him.”

My heart skips a beat. What could this possibly mean? My brain attempts to begin running through the possibilities, but all that comes to mind is the image of Aishi, bloodied, in an alley at New York, promising she would protect me forever.

Could she…?

But something else is in priority.

Error. Technical issues found. Error code: 1642625108268. Someone confessed to Aishi.

It doesn’t matter if he got rejected. He interfered with my experiment, and therefore, should cease to be.

Subject in error: Takeo Fujii. Error scheduled for removal in: as soon as possible.

“Was someone else there?” I ask.

“Um, I heard him mumbling about a friend helping him. But no, we were alone.”

My chest tightens. And I thought Fujii had the minimum human decency of not interfering. But it seems him, and the friend in question, Nakashima, must go.

As we leave, I fall behind on purpose. I open my locker and look at the drug delivery pens I hid there. They are all filled with transparent liquid.

With Fujii it will be easier, since he takes insulin pens and won’t be able to tell this one actually has Amanita mushroom poison if I swap them. Nakashima, however… I can disguise it as accidental insulin overdose— Wait. He is addicted to drugs. I can say I found it in his locker and swear not to tell anyone. Then, when he takes it, he will only die in the next week, probably, since the Amanita poison works like this. I chose this method on purpose, since it will establish a rock-solid alibi for both murders. And I will allow a week between Fujii’s death and Nakashima’s, so even the school won’t be able to guess murder.

I put on rubber gloves, pick up the pens, put them on my bag and go on my way.

***

I find Fujii first. He’s scrambling around, desperately.

“Oh, Haibara-kun!” He exclaims. “Thank goodness. I lost one of my insulin pens and can’t find it anywhere!”

I smile. “Would it happen to be one of these?” I ask, pulling one of my pens from my bag. He lights up.

“Oh, thank you, Haibara-kun!” He grins. “You’re a lifesaver!” He hurries toward the front gate, and pauses to inject the pen onto his abdomen. I smile as I watch.

Goodbye, Takeo Fujii.

You have sealed your fate.

In one week maximum, you will meet the same fate as Kei Nagahara did by the same reason.

Calmly, I walk to the bus, but suddenly my thoughts are interrupted by voices:

“Hey, isn’t that Aishi-san from elementary school?”

I turn around. A group of boys wearing the uniform of another high school stroll by, eyeing Aishi. The boy in the center, who resembles a bit Mochizuki-san, goes pale the moment he lays eyes on her.

“Guys… we gotta go,” he chokes out.

“What, Mochizuki? You afraid of a girl…” one of them begins, but the other slaps him.

“You dumbass! Don’t ya remember what Kazuo told ya ‘bout that gal?” He exclaims.

“Oh, right…” He pales. “Wait, that’s her? She doesn’t look the type to be taking haloperidol every day for ten years now.”

Haloperidol?

My mind goes blank. I suddenly remember the headline Aishi showed me, and the drop:

“She was a friend of my mom’s.”

Kazuo Mochizuki. I remember that name. Ten years ago, he was a second-grade student at Tenjou Elementary School who was nearly choked to death by a kouhai. The other student’s name was never disclosed, but it was informed that they were redirected to psychiatric help and diagnosed with attachment disorder, among other conditions…

Could it be…?

One of them sees me. “Hey, whatta ya looking at?” He asks angrily.

I quickly recover my composure. “Nothing,” I say.

The boys are silent for a moment. “Hey,” the one in the center, Kazuo Mochizuki, says, “you know Tsukasa Aishi?”

I nod. “She’s my vice-president at the student council and my kouhai. Why?”

Mochizuki takes a long breath. “You’d better stay away from that girl,” he says. “She’s a murderous bitch. Look what she did to me.” He lowers his gakuran collar to show a long dark red line across his neck, as if his head had been wrung off then stitched again. “Serves her right to be treated like a walking bomb on black-belt meds. ‘Cause that’s what she is. A psychopath.”

I blink. “Is that so.”

Mochizuki laughs. “My mother was arrested because of that bitch. Got 25 years in jail because she was restraining a fucking risk to public safety. While the girl who committed a REAL CRIME? She gets friends and a nice school.” He laughs louder, almost manically. “But not anymore. I’m gonna get my payback. For me. For Mom.”

I suddenly realize some of the boys are missing. They return as soon as I think that, holding Aishi by her arms.

“Hey! Let go of me!” She shrieks. Then she sees me. “Senpai!”

I try to move, but two of the others grab me from behind.

“Don’t you move, rich kid!” One of them sneers.

They drag us to a dark alley close to the school, where there are no cameras. Mochizuki steps closer to her.

“You remember who I am, don’t ya, Aishi?” He laughs at her confused expression. “Don’t try to act innocent. I know you remember.”

She lowers her head. “I do.”

What is going on here.

What is going on here.

What is—

Mochizuki slaps her. With force.

The boys laugh, and I can only watch as the inflammation grows in her cheek.

“This…” *slap* “…is…” *slap* “…for…” *slap* “…fucking trying to kill me!” He slaps her again, and tears are running down her cheeks.

“This hurts… stop…” she sobs.

“Oh, when I told ya to stop, did you, back then, bitch?” Another slap, much stronger than the others. “NO! You didn’t. You would’ve killed me. You wanted to. And you wouldn’t have regretted it, PSYCHOPATH!”

Aishi looks up. Her eyes meet mine. They are light blue and filled with tears.

“I’m sorry, Senpai…” she whispers. “I got you into this…” She looks up. “Do whatever you want to me, Mochizuki,” she says, trying to keep her voice steady, “but please, let Senpai go.”

“Like hell I will!” He laughs and turns around to look at his other friends. “Hey, look! The attempted murderer is telling me to do somethin’!” They all laugh. Aishi’s eyes are almost void.

My chest tightens. They are probably not letting either of us go. Something terrible will happen here.

Mochizuki turns back to face Aishi. “I’ve had an idea,” he says. “Guys, hold her.”

Grinning, he reaches out with both hands and tears her blazer open.

“STOP!” She cries, as he continues to pull her clothes apart. Something falls from her brassiere, and with the last of her strength, she kicks it in my direction.

A letter opener.

I break free from the boys’ hold and grab the letter opener, pushing out the blade. Without thinking, I run in Mochizuki’s direction and jab the whole thing into the side of his neck.

For a moment, everything goes still. Then, Mochizuki gasps, grabs at his neck, and falls to the ground, unmoving.

“M-murderer!” One of the boys screeches, and they all attempt to run. But they make one fatal mistake.

They let go of Aishi.

In a second she’s yanked the blade from Mochizuki’s neck and started running. Before any of the seven boys can reach the end of the alley, they are all dead.

We both stand still for a minute, breathing hard. Then, finally, I open my mouth.

“Aishi-san, I’m… I’m sorry.”

She looks at me, alarmed. “Why?”

“I… I killed that boy.” My hands are shaking. I have no backup plan for this. This was not on my plans. And now Aishi will never… “I should just… go and turn myself in… I’m no worth… I couldn’t even protect my vice-president… and now look at what I’ve… done…”

A sound of falling metal, then, a small figure collides with me. I look down and I see Aishi is hugging me, crying.

“I’m sorry, Senpai,” she gasps between sobs. “I made you do this. And now you’ve seen how I am. How the entire world thinks I’m crazy for protecting the people I care about. That bastard was bullying Chiho-chan since kindergarten, and I just… couldn’t take it…”

I wrap my arms around her, attempting comfort. “It’s okay, Aishi-san. We’re safe now. You’re safe now.”

“You… you’re not going to…” She looks up at me, shocked.

“I already told you, back in New York.” I smile at her. “I will never, ever leave you. I will never betray you. If the whole universe is against you, then I am against the whole universe. For if you ever have zero supporters, then I no longer exist. Laws, police, the school, the FBI, whoever wants to come, if they are against you, they are against me, too. I will protect you until I die.”

She smiles at last. “Oh… Thank you, Senpai!” She buries her face in my chest, crying.

As I stroke her hair, only one thought comes to mind.

I will end everything, Tsukasa Aishi, if that means I will have you by my side.