Chapter 5 | You’re in My Arms, Yet I’m Thinking of Him

Wen Yan tried hard to be a “normal” girlfriend.

She remembered Lin Yu’s class schedule and reminded him to eat.
She would quicken her steps when he waited for her.
She never pulled away when he held her hand.

To everyone else, they seemed perfect for each other.

But only she knew—
Her heart was hollow.

Once, they went to the movies together.
In the darkness, Lin Yu leaned down and kissed her forehead.
She instinctively closed her eyes,
But in that instant, the only face in her mind was Shen Che’s.

Cold. Restrained. Standing in the rain.

She snapped her eyes open, heart pounding.

“What’s wrong?” Lin Yu asked softly.

“Nothing.” She forced a smile.

By now, she had grown skilled at saying “nothing.”

Late at night, she often sat alone on her bed, staring at her phone.
The screen was clean, no name lighting up.

She had deleted every chat between them.
But she could not erase the memories.

The nights he had stayed with her when she was sick.
The times he didn’t say “I love you” yet still shielded her from harm.

She thought time would make it fade.
But the truth was—
The more she suppressed it, the clearer it became.

Meanwhile, Shen Che’s life was unraveling completely.

He skipped morning classes, his routine in chaos, eyes perpetually red.
He threw himself into part-time jobs and projects, as if running from himself.

Yet whenever he stopped, she was there in his mind.

She held someone else’s hand.
She smiled at someone else.
She was starting a new life.

Those images tormented him endlessly.

One night, drunk far beyond reason, his stomach churning, yet mind painfully lucid,
He found himself standing under a streetlight outside her dorm at two in the morning.

Most lights were off.
He looked up at her window.

And for the first time, a vile, desperate thought crossed his mind—

If she comes down, could it mean she hasn’t been that cruel?

But she didn’t.

Instead, a message came through.

“You’re downstairs?”

His heart jumped.

“Go back.”
“Don’t do this.”

Don’t do this.

The same three words she had once written,
Now hammered into him like a verdict.

Shen Che leaned against the wall and slowly sank to the ground.
The alcohol finally hit, twisting his stomach with pain.

He let out a low, bitter laugh—
She really didn’t want him anymore.

The next day, Wen Yan passed Shen Che on campus.

He was much thinner, but his eyes colder than ever,
As if he had sealed off every emotion.

They brushed past each other.
Her steps didn’t falter.

But as she passed, she caught the sharp smell of alcohol.
Her fingers trembled slightly.

Still, she did not turn back.

That night, Lin Yu held her close.
“After graduation, let’s go to another city,” he said.

Wen Yan paused.
“Far away from here?” He said it seriously.

She stayed silent for a long moment, then nodded.

“Okay.”

The moment she agreed, something inside her shattered.

She thought she had finally learned to move forward.
Unaware that—
Some goodbyes, once begun, can never be undone.

And at the same time, Shen Che received a phone call.

The voice on the other end was low, urgent.
“The past… someone’s started investigating.”

Shen Che gripped the phone so tightly his knuckles turned white.
He closed his eyes, throat tight.

The day he feared the most… had finally come.