1.5. SOON YOU WILL FEEL BETTER!

"But how? You took me to the doctor and..." I couldn't finish talking about what happened after.

"Sorry, but I didn't take anyone to a doctor. I was helping my mother in the shop the whole time..."

Prima smiled and began wrapping a solitary red flower, shaped like a spiral, into beautiful paper packaging. Darian smiled and placed a couple of coins on the counter.

"Listen, Prima, are you free later? Well, that is, if you wouldn't mind going somewhere with me..." Darian blushed and began staring at the parquet floor.

Prima grew even more embarrassed.

"Darian, well, you know I wouldn't mind... b-but... there's my mom."

Darian gathered his courage and looked up.

"Prima, I can't force you to go against your mother, but I'm asking you: let's do it just once... Just this once, this evening, at the flower field. I'm not asking for more."

Prima smiled and leaned in toward Darian. Whispering something in his ear, she quickly pulled back. The happiest smile shone on her face, and the reddest blush in the world adorned her cheeks. She turned away and hurriedly ran from the counter.

Darian turned to me, grinning with all thirty-two teeth, his cheeks glowing with a blush no less red than Prima's.

"Bro, I think today is gonna be the happiest day of my life. Let's go somewhere, quick." The smile vanished from his face, and he examined mine closely.

Walking over and placing a hand on my shoulder, he said, "Bro, why are you standing there like a statue? Is everything okay with you?"

His touch instantly knocked me out of my trance, and I immediately came to my senses.

"Ah, yeah, it's nothing, just got lost in thought, that's all..." I squeezed out a very forced "ha-ha."

"Is it really because Prima doesn't remember you? Maybe it was just a different girl who walked you to the hospital?" He pondered. "Are there even girls here who look like her?.." he mumbled under his breath. "Alright, come on, I'll buy you something tasty to eat while the shops are still open."

He let go of my shoulder and headed for the exit.

"Okay..." I answered and followed him, even though we had just eaten the most delicious meat of my life not long ago.

When we stepped outside, a cold breeze gently brushed my face. Darian took a deep breath of the fresh air.

"It's so crisp today! That means tomorrow will be excellent weather for hunting, and you and I will definitely catch some flyers, right, bro?"

I nodded approvingly, a faint smile appearing on my face. I really liked the idea of hunting; it was such a strong distraction from the eternal thoughts about what was happening and the feeling that someone was watching me. But who would need me enough to watch me?

"Hey, bro, let's go into this shop. The booze here is so tasty, you have no idea."

Booze? Like alcohol? But are we allowed to have that? Darian didn't seem to touch the foamy drinks the other hunters drank, and no one had offered him any back then.

"Are we allowed?" I asked.

He laughed.

"Bro, you probably thought I was talking about invigorating booze? No, these are just regular refreshing drinks. Come inside, you'll see for yourself."

We entered the small shop. The pleasant smell of pastries hit my nose. Darian immediately ran to the register and brought back two glass bottles filled with cloudy water.

"You know, when you asked about the booze, I became even more convinced that you're kinda strange. What local doesn't know about the delicious drink 'Benedicta'? were you really so sick that you never saw this miracle? Here, try it, your brain is just gonna explode." He handed me one of the bottles with a smile.

"Yeah... Thanks!" I took the bottle with the strange liquid inside. Surprisingly, the bottle was exactly the same as hundreds of others I had seen in my world: a standard glass version. I pulled the tab at the cap, and a sound of light fizzing hissed out.

"Well, try it now!"

Alright, I'll try it, it's unlikely to be anything bad. I put the edge of the rim to my lips and, tilting the bottle, took a couple of sips. And god... It is worth trying! It seems like ordinary water, but it awakens every neuron in the head to a frenzy of pleasure with every swallow. I began to greedily drink this sweet, heavenly nectar.

Darian laughed.

"Look at you, you're like a child! It looks like you really haven't tried it before! When I first tried it in my childhood, I couldn't tear my mouth away from the bottle either—it's just too tasty!"

"Yeah, you're right, it's unreal!" It was as if vital forces I never even had were awakening within me.

"Let's go, bro. I still need to manage to help my mother and meet up with my darling Prima," Darian said with a smile, walking out of the shop.

"Darling Prima"? So that's how it is. Maybe she just lied because she's in love with Darian? Although no, that's strange: what's the point of lying if she simply met me and walked me to the hospital? Though her behavior was colossally different from what it was back then.

It was getting noticeably colder on the street. Darian looked up at the sky.

"Hey, look at that, it's so beautiful! The last time I saw something like this was in deep childhood."

I didn't even have to look up before something cold touched my nose. Is that a snowflake? Large flakes of snow in various patterns fell from the sky, quite rapidly painting the ground white.

"Wow, this is even more beautiful than it was in my childhood." Darian smiled, watching the miraculous scene with a bright light in his eyes.

The snow slowly settled on the roofs of buildings and trees. I was so mesmerized by this view that I didn't notice the snow simply stopped, hanging in the air. Just like Darian. Just like everything around.

What? I walked up to Darian.

"Hey, b-bro?" I called out, poking him with my finger, but absolutely no reaction followed.

"Well, hello."

Soft, gentle hands wrapped around my neck, and some light ballast hung off my back. I spun around immediately and came face to face with Prima. I was shocked.

"Prima, but you... You like, don't remember me, and Darian is here!"

Prima laughed.

"What Darian? Who needs that petty little human? By the way, I see you feel better; the pain in your head has calmed down." She ran her gentle hand along my cheek.

"Pain?" I uttered, tasting the word.

And truly, for some reason, I didn't feel the previous pain from everything I had endured. It all started to seem more like a dream than real events. Maybe it really is a dream, and I actually am Elian and always was... No, that's nonsense. I remember being in school, home, grandma and grandpa, even some memories with my father.

"Yes, you are right, you are not Elian. And it's so cute that memories of your father are stored somewhere in the depths of your head. I wonder, what kind of man was he? Probably a good one?" Prima spoke, stroking my head.

What? Did she hear what I was thinking? Or did I say that out loud?

"Stop thinking about foolish things. Right now, I want to show you something, something for ONLY you to see. I know it will hurt, but not for long. A light pain—and you will help me, just as you promised."

Help? Something in my soul says that I promised to help someone, but I completely forgot. Is it her I'm supposed to help? Suddenly, Prima's soft, warm lips collided with mine.

My body began to shake, my head started to swim: severe dizziness, nausea, pain in all my limbs. An acute sound, like a fork scratching a chalkboard, rang in my ears... and teeth? What... My head was very heavy.

I slowly opened my eyes. Some woman was poking me with the blunt edge of something oblong. There were many vague images in my head, at least five. I... No, not me. I can't do anything. Someone wiped my eyes with my hands, and I began to see.

Motherfucker, I wanted to recoil from this sight, but I couldn't move at all. The woman, scary as hell, looked right at me with a creepy smile. Behind her back was a hideous, enormous scythe with a giant mouth and an eye staring creepily straight into the very core of my soul.

"Hey, Ve... I mean, V." The girl suddenly started flipping out. "FUCKING PSEUDONYMS! WHY THE FUCK CAN'T WE CALL EACH OTHER BY OUR USUAL NAMES?"

"Why are you waking me up, little slut? We haven't even arrived at the location yet, and you've already woken me. Do you want me to chop off your little head and hang it on my belt?" a voice uttered from my gut. Was that me speaking just now? That can't be, I can't do anything at all... My hand grabbed the woman by the throat and pinned her against the wall. I felt the incredible force with which what I consider my hand squeezed her neck. Gasping, she tried to say something, even grabbed me by my... Oh god, I didn't notice: was my arm always this huge? I felt the woman trying to tear my palm off herself, but she couldn't do a thing.

"Apologize to me on your knees, and then your head will remain in its usual place. Well, for now..." my voice—or someone's voice—uttered through my mouth.

The girl gasped for air, her eyeballs slowly bulging out of their sockets.

"O-ok... ay... I..." she uttered.

My hand released her, and she fell to her knees before me. Spitting blood at my feet, she immediately began to apologize.

"Forgive me, master, I'm sorry, I am your slut..." she began to kiss my combat boots.

What 'my'... I never had combat boots, why do I think this is me...

"Good girl, good pet..." I said and patted her on the head.

Another male voice was heard nearby.

"Heh, good old V..." The owner of the voice placed a palm on my shoulder. "You still love breaking toys, haven't changed a bit since the moment we ended up here. Although, maybe that distinguishes the strong from the weak?"

My head turned in his direction.

He stood there, his hand on my shoulder. He was dressed like some kind of samurai: long hair with red tips, his mouth covered in bandages, and his eyes—anomalous: they glowed, and a spiral swirled within them.

"Don't talk such nonsense, Z," I said, throwing his palm off my shoulder. "I just don't like it when some weaklings wake me ahead of time. How much longer is the flight, N?"

I walked up to something that resembled a cockpit. A young-looking guy in a white coat sat at the controls; his hair was snow-white, and his eyes were blue.

"Commander, arriving any minute now. By the way, what is this matter that caused all this fuss? And why are we dragging civilians in the extra compartment?"

I smiled.

"Kid, don't ask stupid questions. Our great leader needs it, and the rest isn't important. Regarding the civilians, I have no idea, but they seem to be some kind of scientists... Maybe they decided to study this anomalous activity from the matter. Honestly, I don't give a damn..."

"Well, I get it, another one of the King's antics..." the guy said, nodding.

I walked away from the cabin and sat in my previous spot. With a snap of my fingers, a cigarette appeared in my hands. I put it in my mouth and brought up my index finger, from which a light flame emerged.

"Ah, what could be better than obtaining a new artifact and making our nation great," I said, smoking the cigarette.

STOP. STOP... STOP... Why do I feel like I am him? This is all too realistic. What is happening?

The vessel shook.

"COMMANDER, WE ARE GOING DOWN! THE COMPARTMENT WITH THE CIVILIANS IS DAMAGED AND JUST DETACHED! SOMETHING IS PULLING US IN, PREPARE FOR A HARD LANDING..." THE KID SCREAMED FROM THE COCKPIT.

"Oh, I like that. Open the hatch, I want to land beautifully," I said with a smile.

The hatch opened immediately. A strong wind hit my face; it was very powerful, but I continued to stand on my feet as if nothing was happening, arms crossed, cigarette in my teeth.

A heavenly place appeared before my gaze: beautiful green meadows and trees, vast unexplored lands situated right in the heavens.

The guy with the bandages ran to the exit of the falling ship.

"Well, see you on the ground, V..." quite pretentiously, he jumped down, hands behind his head, falling backward.

"Dammit... Everyone, deploy! Last one down buys a couple of kegs of beer on his own dime!"

I and four other figures made the jump. Holy shit, that height, I would never have jumped from there so easily...

When the ground was very close, I tucked and, like some superhero, landed on one knee, fist planted into the surface. The soil beneath me cracked and sank slightly, some impulse rippling out from me in all directions. Loud sounds were heard—apparently, the others landed nearby.

"Well hello, new land," I said, standing up and brushing myself off slightly.

"Hey, V, look! Massive energy is coming from them, I see it with my own eyes!" the guy with the bandages said, pointing at something.

I looked around: two completely naked feminine figures with huge white wings behind their backs stood looking at us in surprise.

"Ha, wait, so the energy was coming from them? That can't be. And where is the matter everyone was talking about?" I asked.

"You know, let me turn them inside out and see what's inside? Maybe they just contain pieces of the matter and are merely carriers of the energy," said the guy with the bandages. The spirals in his eyes began to spin faster, and out of nowhere, a long katana appeared in his hands.

"Ha, remembering Mordheim and the scrawny robots, are you? Well, try it, let's see what comes of it," I said, crossing my arms.

The guy with the bandages rushed toward these creatures faster than the speed of sound. They only started to run away the moment the blade had already bisected their carcasses, but they hadn't even realized it. The guy sat on one knee, putting the sword away literally into the void, turning it into white sparks. The creatures' bodies fell apart into chunks of meat with organs spilling out; something green and glowing flew out of their bodies and headed toward the guy.

"Ha, imagine that, V, turns out I was right! They are just full of energy!" he shouted, theatrically wiping his bandage-covered mouth as if he had just eaten.

"Meaning they are the energy. Then what do we tell the King? That there's simply nothing here, or do we leave one of these NPCs as an artifact?" I said, pulling two large pistols resembling Desert Eagles out of the void.

The guy smiled, pulling out his humongous katana again. "Let's leave one toy and tell the King that this is all we found. First time doing something like this, or what?" He laughed.

I laughed in response: "Well then, let's go loot some XP."

"I WANT ENERGY TOO!" said the girl, and moved reactively fast with her ugly scythe somewhere forward.

"Hey, I'll be first!" screamed the guy with the bandages and rushed after her even faster.

"Damn children, all they want is to have fun, they know nothing except fun," I said with a chuckle.

"Commander, I, perhaps, will just wait for you here. Let me know if a worthy opponent appears!" said the kid sitting on a rock.

"Alright, N, stay here if you want, but I'd recommend farming a little XP anyway," I said, moving forward.

My legs were very powerful. I dashed with such speed that I tore the air, and stopped just as abruptly, as if hitting a solid wall, upon reaching some buildings. Those two idiots were hacking everyone to pieces: rivers of blood in which the bodies of NPCs lay...

"HEY V, QUIT STANDING THERE LIKE A PILLAR, COME JOIN THE FUN!" Z shouted, laughing.

"Coming!" I smiled and leaped upward, starting to shoot at the carcasses running below. Their heads exploded from my hits.

"THEY HAVE WINGS, BUT APPARENTLY THEY CAN'T FLY! WHAT STUPID TOYS!" screamed the girl, hacking everyone in a row with her scythe. Not just hacking: sometimes her scythe transformed and bit the heads off these creatures, and the eye on it burned with an increasingly bright red color.

I landed down, crushing a couple of heads of the bodies lying below with my combat boots. NO, NO, NO, STOP! DON'T! WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS? WHAT IS HAPPENING? WHY? THESE VOICES... VOICES, THEY ECHO IN MY HEAD. HELLISH, HORRIBLE SCREAMS, PLEADING FOR MERCY... WHY? NO, I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS! I SHOOT AND SHOOT AT THE HEADS OF THESE INNOCENT CREATURES. WHY? FOR WHAT? WHAT IS HAPPENING? STOP IT! ENOUGH! MY HANDS SHOULDN'T BE DOING THIS! LAUGHTER, HORROR, MERCY, SOME GREEN ENERGY FLYING OUT OF THEIR BODIES... THIIIIIIIS IS NOT ME...

Several figures with glowing spears flew down from above. They pronounced in thunderous voices: "CEASE YOUR BLASPHEMY, YOU WRETCHES!"

But in that same moment, a bright golden line pierced the sky, and their heads simply exploded.

"Eh, and I thought these were worthy opponents..." N said, literally hovering in the air holding a sniper rifle.

"Ahahahaha, you came too?" Z asked, laughing.

"Well, I got bored reading my book and waiting for you, so I came. I don't like killing weaklings, but unfortunately, I had to," N said, landing on the ground.

FOR HOURS... THESE SCREAMS LASTED FOR HOURS. A MULTITUDE OF HUMANOID CREATURES WITH WINGS WERE BEFORE MY EYES. THEY DIED LIKE SOME STUPID NPCS IN GAMES, THEIR LIVES WORTH NOTHING. ONLY UNLIKE A GAME, THIS WAS REAL: BLOOD, MEAT... I WANT TO... I WANT TO RUN AS FAR AWAY AS POSSIBLE! I DON'T WANT TO SEE THIS HORROR, TO SEE IT FROM THE FIRST PERSON, HOW I AM KILLING THIS PEOPLE WITH MY OWN HANDS.

My eyes slowly opened; I was in the soft, blissful embrace of Prima.

"Pain, fear, despair... You felt it all. You felt how terrified these people were, how slowly they lost hope, and these bastards destroyed them like ants unworthy of life..." Prima spoke.

Tears welled up in my eyes one after another.

"Yes, they were in so much pain... I won't be able to forget this horror and simply can't believe that someone is capable of destroying unknown creatures just like that, absolutely valuing another's life at nothing... They felt it... They were alive, and these bastards treated it... like a game, a regular computer game..." I said, wiping away tears.

Prima pressed me tighter to herself: "You know, I am very glad you agreed to help me... THANKS TO YOU... I CAN... I DEFINITELY CAN... KISS ME..."

"Yes, my Prima..." My head became foggy.

I rushed to Prima and began to kiss her... Gradually, what I had seen dissolved into a sleepy haze, but wrath and anger began to consume me. I didn't feel pain, I felt hellish wrath that heated my veins, making me stronger than anyone in the world...

"Yes, you will be the strongest, because now you are mine..." Prima's voice uttered in my ear, although her lips didn't tear away from mine for a second.

A bitter, but simultaneously sweet taste remained on my lips and tongue. Never tasted anything more delicious. The tastiest, the greediest...

DESIRE. To bend the knee, to submit, to become a puppet. DESIRE. To be loved and to love. DESIRE. To live and continue my lineage. DESIRE. To become free. NO DESIRES...

Someone controls my hands, my legs, controls that which is not there, controls my head, which is also not there... I... AM NOT...

"That hit your head pretty hard. But once, I felt that way too, so I can easily understand you. But you are actually freer than many creatures: you have the right to fight. Although I feel there is something that won't let you follow your path so easily. And it's not even me. It is something that lies beyond a multitude of foolish thoughts; something that lies far beyond the concept of our universe... That which controls the multitude of threads streaming from the cosmos. But do not worry and under no circumstances be afraid: I have you, you have me. SOON YOU WILL FEEL BETTER!"