He Needs to Know

"Abbi?"

Issabella scarcely heard. So focused on getting to the large doors at the end of the foyer, she didn't even notice that someone had begun walking next to her, let alone hearing her name being called.

"Abbi!"

A hand on her shoulder caused her to stop suddenly, the voice's owner nearly colliding with her. Issabella turned to see Dain, in his guard's attire.

"It's Abbi, right?"

Issabella breathed deeply, catching her breath. She gave the guard a sidelong look.

"I think you know that Abbi is not my name," she told him, narrowing her eyes.

As one of the queen's guards, he likely knew her name after her audience with the queen.

Abbi glanced at his arm, then again at his face. She didn't like the guard or trust him.

"It's what Ed called you, it's what I'll call you." He paused for a moment before removing his hand from her shoulder. "Does he know that it's not your name?"

"We share a mate-bond," Issabella said hotly, "what do you think?"

"The mate-bond, of course. That hadn't occurred to me."

Issabella turned away from him, facing the direction she'd been going when he had stopped her, though she did not start walking again.

"What are you doing here, Abbi?"

Issabella looked up at the large door at the end of the hall, then turned sharply to face the guard, the tears she'd turned away to hide spilling down her face. Dain's eyes widened, and he quickly looked around them, glancing toward the doors and then again at Issabella.

"Abbi- "

Issabella raised a hand, silencing him. Her hand closed into a trembling fist.

"I need answers," she said through clenched teeth.

"What answers?" Dain reached forward, touching Issabella's arm. She pulled back, avoiding his hand. "You'll only find trouble if you enter the Hall without a summons. Please... speak with me instead."

Issabella shook her head, taking a small step back, away from the guard. She again looked in the direction of the doors to the hall, then wiped the tears from her cheeks, first with one hand, then the other. She shook her head again.

"Abbi, please don't. I can't let you go in there."

"Of course you can't," Issabella said bitterly, "you work for the queen."

"Please, sit with me." Dain gestured toward the side of the foyer in which they stood. Along the wall outside of the door leading into the Hall were benches, used by those waiting to enter. Closer to the door, the benches were occupied, but further from it, they were empty. "I want to help you. I want to help Ed. At least let me try to answer your questions."

Issabella looked again toward the door. She would probably not even make it into the Hall, and even if she did, the likelihood of her getting to speak with someone before a guard escorted her out and took her into custody was very small. She would then probably face some form of harsh disciplinary action that would further keep her from Eddus.

At the same time, she did not really want to have anything to do with Dain. In her mind, he seemed to be playing for both sides. He worked for the queen. While it was his job to do whatever it was that job required, he'd also seemed to have taken an interest in Eddus. It was possible that he was just a nice guy, but it was also possible that he was keeping tabs and reporting what he saw.

Her emotions a turmoil of conflict, Abbi nodded slowly. She turned toward Dain, who gestured again to a bench at the side of the foyer. They made their way to it and sat facing towards one another, but not saying anything.

Dain studied Issabella's face as he patiently waited for her to be the first to speak. She sat, looking down at the ground in front of her, one hand clasping the other on her lap. On her face was an expression that, on the surface looked like anger, but if one were to notice the look in her eyes, it was apparent that she was worried, confused, and scared. She kept her head down, not looking at the guard.

After a few moments, Dain took it upon himself to start the conversation, as he was unsure how long she would hold out.

"Abbi, please speak with me. You were about to risk the consequences of walking into the Royal Hall while it is in session. That is a very serious offense. What is wrong?"

"What's wrong?" Issabella scoffed. She spoke coldly, her eyes distant. "You mean besides that you tried to kill my mate? My bonded mate! He is one of us, by our own laws, and you tried to kill him!"

"I didn't have anything to do with Ed's sentencing or the carrying out of that sentence, Abbi," Dain said to her calmly, though he wore a concerned and sympathetic look. "And if it had been up to me, he would have received any and all leniency allowed. Although rather misguided, I know his intention in coming here was only to help you. I know that he was truthful about that intention from the moment he arrived. And to be fair, the sentence was unfortunately handed down before it was known that the two of you had mate-bonded. His case is being taken before the queen again to decide how to proceed now that it is known."

Issabella said nothing, only continued to sullenly look at the ground just in front of her.

"Abbi, I want you to know that I had nothing to do with what happened to Ed. I have only ever wanted to help him."

"The door is locked," Issabella said quietly.

Dain remained quiet, unsure of what she was saying. After a moment, Issabella turned her head, looking at him, her eyes still distant. He met her gaze.

"The door is locked," she repeated, shaking her head. "His door... it's locked..."

Dain nodded slowly, the meaning of her words occurring to him.

"It's locked because he was sentenced by the queen, but the sentence was not carried out. It was locked for the protection of the realm. He is the first prisoner here in thousands of years."

"I don't care about any of that!" Issabella spoke, her jaw clenched, looking at the guard I frustration. "I can't get in to see Eddus!"

"Eddus?"

The guard tilted his head slightly. His brows knitted as he looked at her questioningly.

Issabella paled as realization overwhelmed her, and she inhaled sharply.

"Fuck!" she cried out, her voice echoing in the foyer. Eyes welling, tears flowed down her cheeks, and the pixie put her face into her hands, sobbing and shaking her head.

Several of those passing by, as well as those sitting on the benches closer to the Hall, turned in the direction of the outburst to regard her with curiosity and concern. Dain looked at those closest to them, raising a hand towards them, glancing towards Issabella. They nodded slowly and carried on with their business.

"Abbi?"

Issabella shook her head, sobbing harder. Her hands still cupping her face, she pulled her elbows in towards her stomach, slowly sinking forward onto her lap.

The guard looked on, unsure of what had just happened or how to proceed. More passersby slowed or even stopped to see what was going on. A few seated on the benches stood up, inching closer to catch a glimpse, concern on their faces.

Keeping his hand low, Dain tried to wave those gathering away, but with little success. Feeling exasperated at the onlookers, he wanted nothing more than to take the distraught pixie somewhere that they could talk privately.

Cautiously, he extended his arm and touched her shoulder gently, at which Issabella sat up instantly, recoiling from his touch. Using her feet, she pushed herself back on the bench, away from him, shaking her head. Several of the gathering onlookers dispersed quickly at her sudden movement, though casting glances back at the two on the bench.

"Abbi, what is it?" Dain raised both hands in front of him, palms toward her. He moved back on the bench just slightly to give her space. His expression was one of unsettled bewilderment, while hers resembled that of a child severely reprimanded.

She looked as if she'd just realized some irreversible consequence of an action, and was both terrified and overcome with grief. Wide-eyed, she looked at Dain, her tears still flowing, then lowered her gaze. She looked around her as if she were not sure of where she was.

Dain could see that she was clearly in shock. Whatever had happened, whatever realization she'd come to, had shaken her badly.

Getting to his feet, the guard took a step toward her. She appeared not to notice his movement at all. Her shoulders slumped; she'd not shifted her gaze from the floor.

"Abbi..." As Dain slowly approached her, Issabella raised her eyes, peering up at him, acknowledging his presence but with no real recognition in her gaze. "Come with me, Abbi. Let me get you some water."

He held out his hand, which she took absentmindedly. Placing the other hand on her arm, Dain helped her to her feet. They walked slowly to an open door on the other side of the foyer, a soft light filling the room as they entered. In the center of the room was a table with a chair on either side of it, used for consultations before one was taken into the Hall to see the queen.

Issabella took a seat in the chair that Dain led her to, where she sat motionless while he quickly fetched a glass of water. Closing the door, he placed it on the table in front of her and sat in the chair opposite her.

"Abbi?" Dain spoke softly.

They sat in silence for a few moments. The guard studied the pixie with concern.

"Two days." Issabella grasped the glass, staring at it blankly. "...not even two whole days."

"I don't understand," Dain said, leaning forward on the table.

"It hasn't even been two days, and I have betrayed him." Issabella raised her eyes to look at Dain, a tear escaping her left eye.

"Eddus..." Dain spoke under his breath the name he'd heard her say, beginning to understand.

"Don't!" Abbi shouted. Pushing the glass away from her, its contents sloshing down its sides and onto the table, she stood quickly, her expression changing. Her amber eyes darkened to black as she leaned over the table, glaring at him, her jaw clenched. "Don't you speak his name! Not now, not ever!"

Her sudden movement startled the guard, who jerked backward in his chair, blinking at her in surprise.

As quickly as her anger had come on, it dissolved. She placed both hands on the table, the amber colour of her eyes returned, and she blinked, her tears falling into the puddled water on the tabletop.

"Please," she pleaded, hanging her head. "Don't..."

She sank slowly back onto her chair. Turning her forearm, she looked down at the blue mark there, tracing the sign of her mate-bond with her fingertip.

"I won't say it." Dain now understood fully her behavior, and he could see her anguish at having let her mate's name slip. He hadn't realised that it was the human's true name when she'd said it earlier.

"You shouldn't even know that name," Issabella said softly.

She'd not only spoken his name, giving away the one thing that she alone possessed in this realm, and her most treasured possession, but she had given it to a member of the Guard, and the very people that wanted him dead. A tear fell into her lap, and she shook her head.

"It's all that I had... And I betrayed him."

"You still have it, Abbi," Dain said softly, shaking his head. "You said it in distress, by accident, and I am the only one who heard it."

At these words, Issabella began to sob uncontrollably. She put her arm on the table, laying her head on it. The other, she used to cradle the back of her head with her hand.

Dain was at a loss. Her reaction puzzled him deeply. What he'd said was meant to be helpful and reassuring to the girl, but had obviously only made matters worse. He didn't know what he could do. He could try and console her, but with words only. It was clear from her previous reactions that she was either opposed to physical contact or that she didn't like it when he, himself, made physical contact with her.

"Abbi."

He watched her sympathetically, her head still on her arms.

Her breathing slowly evened out, from short and sharp gasps to longer, deeper breaths. Inhaling deeply, she wiped her eyes on the back of her arm, raising her head. Dain quickly removed a folded handkerchief from the pocket of his uniform and gingerly held it out to her.

"You can't understand," Issabella said, taking the cloth from him. She dabbed her eyes, her gaze fixed on the surface of the table. The light of the room, though not overly bright, hurt her head, and she felt the urge to lie down. "You couldn't."

"I want to understand," Dain said softly. "I want to help. Please, Abbi, make me understand."

"He gave me his name the night we met." Issabella inhaled deeply. She sighed, raising her eyes to look at Dain. "I knew his name just a few moments after meeting him for the first time. His true name."

"I'm still not sure I follow. Ed is human."

"It doesn't matter. He trusted me. He told me his true name before he even asked for my own name."

Dain nodded. He stood, taking a few paces before turning towards the table again. He was beginning to realize what it was that she meant, and why she was so upset.

Until moments ago, she was the only being in the realm that knew Ed as Eddus. In a world where one's name was guarded and kept safe from anyone except those a person trusted implicitly, and sometimes known by no one other than the bearer of that name... the knowledge was considered special to the point of preciousness, especially by those mated individuals.

"Are you mate-bonded?" Issabella asked Dain. She wiped at her cheek with the handkerchief before continuing without awaiting a reply. "Does anyone in the entire world, apart from yourself, know your mate's true name?

Dain felt a pang of guilt, although he'd had nothing to do with her revealing Ed's name and very little to do with how it came to be that she'd spokenit. The mate-bond between Abbi and the human was new. Only days old, and she'd accidentally uttered his name in the presence of another. He couldn't imagine the devastation he would have felt had their roles been reversed.

"Does he know?"

"How could he possibly know?" Issabella snapped. Her face flashed anger at the faerie, and she looked away from him, the bun tied at the back of her neck coming undone, spilling her hair down her back. "He's unconscious, and his door is locked! This never would have happened if I'd been able to get in to see him!"

"That is not what I meant," Dain said. "Does Ed know how you feel, how much you value knowing his name?"

"Of course not," Issabella said softly, shaking her head. "He's human. I did try to explain it to him the night we formed our mate-bond, when I gave him my true name. I told him how his name was the most treasured thing I had, but I don't know if he could ever fully understand."

There was a moment of silence.

"How did he take finding out that your name is not Abbi?"

Issabella looked up at him, restraining the urge to speak out in anger. As much as she objected to him and did not want to speak to him, Dain had stopped her from doing something that would have had severe repercussions. And he was the only person with whom she could talk, the only one with any sort of answers.

"What do you think?" She held out her arm, the blue line in the middle of her forearm up, so that he could see it.

"You're right. You're right, I should not have asked you that."

Dain's hand went instinctively to his own arm, running his finger across the mark of his mate-bond under the sleeve of his uniform. He felt as though he'd asked too personal a question. It was not his business. The bond between Abbi and the human was obviously successful.

Shaking a slight feeling of embarrassment as he sat down again, Dain folded his hands on the table in front of him, watching as Issabella lifted the glass, sipping the water. She then dipped the corner of the handkerchief into the liquid in the glass, and then began to wipe her face.

"Abbi." Dain waited until Issabella had folded the cloth she held and placed it on the table. They sat for a moment in silence. "I can't undo what is done. I know that it was never meant for me to hear what you said. But I will make this promise to you here, and I would promise it again in front of Ed, that nobody outside of this room will ever know his true name. If I could, I would give it back to you so that, again, only you knew it. I don't care that I work for the queen. I promise you here that I will take his name with me to my grave."

"You promise?"

"I promise it on my own name, and on the secret of the true name of my bonded mate," Dain said solemnly, "it will never leave this room. In truth, Ed doesn't even have to know."

Issabella shook her head. She knew what he meant. If Dain were to truly take the knowledge of Eddus' name with him to his death, then Eddus could live his whole life and never know anything about it. But there was no way that she would do that to him. She couldn't.

"He will know, as soon as I am able to tell him." Issabella closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. She sighed. "I doubt he'll ever fully understand, but he deserves to know. This is all so new, and I know so little about being mate-bonded, but I could never keep anything from him."

Dain only nodded, silently chiding himself for suggesting that the day's events be kept secret from the pixie's mate. The only thing that softened the shame he felt was that he'd offered it as an option due to the circumstances. At the time, he could fully understand if she kept it to herself, as he would keep to himself any knowledge of it.

When he considered again how things would be if their roles were reversed, though, the thought of trying to live with that guilt not only repulsed him, but he was appalled that he'd even entertained the idea.

"I have to see him, Dain."

Opening her eyes, Issabella met the guard's gaze.

"Please, get me in to see him."

"I don't know if that's possible, Abbi. The door is locked by order of the queen. No one is to go in or out, except those watching his recovery, until a decision has been made about what is to be done with him."

"Please..."

"I will ask about what can be done," Dain shook his head, "But this is a very rare situation. Ed is the first prisoner in the realm in longer than anyone can remember. There was a lot of debate as to how to treat this."

"You have to let me in," Issabella pleaded, her eyes filling with tears again. "Lock the door behind me. I won't leave. I'll stay with him for as long as it takes. I have to be there when he wakes up... I have to tell him..."

"I don't know what they'll allow, Abbi. I cannot make any promises."

"I have to be there when he wakes, Dain! I have to speak to him the moment he awakes." Issabella leaned forward, grasping his folded hands tightly. "There is something he needs to know."

"Abbi?" Dain blinked at her in surprise.

"Dain, he needs to know that I'm carrying his child!"