Banished

Eddus lay on his back, looking up at the ceiling in the dim light. There was no possible way he could sleep. Aside from the empty feeling in the pit of his stomach at the news he'd received, he felt wave after wave of sorrow, pain, and fear that vibrated through his entire body. He could only guess that it was the link he now shared with Issabella.

He was distressed by the feeling. Combined with what he was experiencing at the same time, it was quite overwhelming. While the sensations were similar to what he himself was feeling, they were distinctly different in that he could feel that they were not his own. With each breath she drew, he could feel Issabella's fear and sadness, as well as an intense despair, which only added to the guilt he felt.

He wondered what she could feel coming from him and if it only compounded what she already felt.

His right arm touching the wall, he'd given as much room as he could to his pixie mate, who lay beside him, still wearing her dress.

She'd fallen into an exhausted slumber almost immediately upon lying her head down, one hand on Eddus' chest, her back to the edge of the bed. Her eyes darted behind closed eyelids, and her breathing wavered. Her wings trembled from time to time while she slept.

Issabella had been an emotional mess while she, or rather, Dain, told him of the queen's new ruling and what it entailed.

They explained to him how the price of his being allowed to live was twofold: his being allowed to live hinged on the assurance that the child Issabella carried was never to be allowed to leave the faerie realm.

Eddus had broken down completely when he realised that his banishment from the faerie realm and his unborn baby's confinement to it meant that he would never know, or even see, his child. He'd tried his best contain it, but his mate became inconsolable watching him struggle. The two of them held one another sharing in each other's grief and pain.

Dain left shortly after. There was nothing more to be said. He awkwardly excused himself, saying that not only was it late but also that the two of them needed time alone together. There was no more help that he could offer, and he had someone waiting up for him as well.

For a long time after his departure, Eddus and Issabella sat together. He sat in the chair that he'd begun to feel confined to, and she on the floor in front of him. They sat in silence. On her knees, Issabella leaned against his left leg, her cheek resting on his thigh, her eyes closed.

Eddus carefully undid Issabella's hair, tied low at the back of her head, letting her hair fall down her back and over the base of her wings between her shoulders. He ran his fingers through her hair, watching as her breathing slowed.

Her body would jolt suddenly as she began to fall asleep. She would inhale sharply, her eyes springing open. Each time, he'd smile down at her, still stroking her hair and telling her to close her eyes again.

On the last such occasion, her breathing had slowed, becoming deep and regular for several minutes before she awoke with a start. Eddus coaxed her off the floor, telling her that she needed to lie down.

Nodding bleakly, she silently got to her feet, then assisted him from the chair and onto the bed, where she lay down facing him. Eyelids heavy, she kissed him and let her head sink into the pillow. She was unconscious within moments.

With no concept of how much time had passed, Eddus lay wide awake in the shadowy light. The conversation he'd had with Dain and Issabella replayed in his mind again and again.

Each time he recalled what was said, it came in a different order, but no matter how he recalled it, the meaning was the same. He would never be permitted to come back to this place. He would never see the child he'd only found out about a few days before. And if he understood things correctly, he'd never even meet his child.

His chest ached. The thought brought on questions concerning whether or not he would ever see Issabella again, and if so, how often?

Would she be able to visit him? Would she bring him pictures of their child or show their child pictures of him? Would the pixie even have the time to venture into the human world while trying to raise a baby on her own?

Placing his right hand gently over the small hand resting on his chest, Eddus turned his head to look at Issabella. As he watched her brows twitch ever so slightly and the movement of her eyes behind their closed lids, he could only wonder what she was seeing in her dreams. He felt a slight relief at the realisation that, having fallen into uninterrupted slumber, the turmoil he felt through his link with her had begun to abate, if only a little. Grateful that she could now rest, he gently kissed her forehead.

Turning his arm slightly, he could see the mark across the middle of his forearm. The glow of the blue line was brighter than normal, being in close proximity to hers. The blue light below his skin still amazed him, both for the fact that it somehow glowed and for the fact that the thin line was one of only two that were somehow linked only to one another.

His eyes resting on the mark on his arm, he began to feel a growing nagging doubt. Agreeing to become Issabella's bonded mate was not the right thing to have done. He truly did love her, and to be married to her should have been the happiest thing he could have experienced. But the uncertainty of the future had not let him enjoy the feeling. Where he should have been the happiest he'd ever been, he felt the heavy weight of guilt at having put the young lady he loved into this situation.

The tiny woman beside him whimpered, inhaling sharply and then let out a wavering breath. Eddus recalled how badly he'd felt before they had mate-bonded at even the thought of making her a widow.

'What kind of person would I be to tell you that I love you and then marry you, knowing that at any time I might be taken away and killed...'

In light of the circumstances, he felt that it would have been better had he just faced the consequences of entering the faerie ring.

His life had now been spared, and Issabella was not going to be left a widow. Instead, she would be a single mother, married to a man from another world, who would never be there for his child. She was now linked to a man that she may or may not ever see again. As if he couldn't feel any worse about things, if he had understood what she'd told him, she would now somehow be forever linked to him.

The situation now included not only the two of them but also the life of an innocent child. It was so much worse than if he'd been sentenced to death again. In retrospect, he knew that, alive or not, they'd made a terrible mistake.