Detective Yamamoto Meets the Press Part 2

Satoshi felt fairly confident that this case had been exactly what the detective needed to get back in the game. The man who had approached the agency had a straightforward problem, namely that he had misplaced his coat, one that had sentimental value, and Detective Yamamoto was in a good position to help the man in record time. So confident of this was Satoshi that, acting on impulse, he had invited the client to follow along. Detective Yamamoto grumbled a bit, but she didn't contradict him.

The man's timeline of events made sense. He had gone from a bar, to another, to a third. Sometime after leaving the first bar, he had lost track of his coat. As such, the first bar yielded nothing. The second bar hadn't yielded anything either, but the third and final bar finally gave the detective what she was looking for.

As Detective Yamamoto and the others entered the bar, her eye was drawn to a set of coat hooks behind the bar, upon which hung a leather jacket. Detective Yamamoto turned to the client and gestured over the the jacket. The man nodded. Detective Yamamoto turned back around and approached the bar, which was currently being tended to by a portly man whose arms were covered in tattoos.

“Excuse me,” said the detective, now leaning forward on the bar. “Is that coat yours?” The bartender looked up from the glass he was polishing and glanced at the jacket.

“Uh, yeah it's mine.” he said, looking briefly at the detective before returning his attention to the glass. Detective Yamamoto made a gesture with her hand to tell the client to stand down. She didn't honestly expect him to speak up, but it was better to be safe than sorry.

“Are you sure?” asked the detective. The bartender looked up and there was a brief glint of annoyance in his eyes as if he resented being questioned.

“Yeah, I'm sure.” he replied, now more gruff than before.

“If you're so sure,” said the detective, taking on an arrogant tone of voice, “then why don't you turn out the inside pocket?”

“What?” asked the bartender. He sounded irritated, but this was surpassed, if only slightly, by confusion.

“You heard me,” replied the detective. “I'd wager you'll find the name 'Kaneda' sewn inside the pocket.”

“Don't be stupid.” The bartender, now sufficiently goaded, plodded over to the leather coat and reached inside the pocket. It was only as he turned it inside out that he noticed the stitching while simultaneously, a realization seemed to come over him. He looked over his shoulder at the detective's client and seemed to recognize him.

“Oh, you recognize our friend here?” asked the detective. “You should. He had a little too much to drink last night and you decided you liked his coat.” The bartender looked as though Detective Yamamoto had rapped him right between the eyes with a knuckle.

“How did you know?” he asked, with notes of either guilt or embarrassment at having been caught. The detective adopted a condescending pose with one hand on her waist and the other positioned so she could inspect her fingernails.

“Intuition, mostly,” said the detective, “but you've also just admitted to it.” The bartender groaned and the client went behind the bar to reclaim his coat.

“Thanks for your help, detective,” said the man as he put his arms through the sleeves of his coat and shrugged it on.

“My pleasure,” said the detective performatively. “Do you want to press charges? I happen to know a police officer.” The client looked between the detective and the bartender.

“Nah,” he said. “It's all water under the bridge. See you next week Tetsuo!”

“Yeah, you too man.” replied the bartender, waving politely. The client pulled out a wad of bills and handed them over to the detective before leaving the bar.

Satoshi and Detective Yamamoto turned to face one another. Satoshi could tell by looking at her that, despite the successful conclusion of the case, this had definitely deviated from their expectations. Ultimately, the detective shrugged, pocketed the money, and started making for the door. She would have made it too, had she not been intercepted. Thrusting a microphone and a camera in her face, Tomoko Tachibana had managed to waylay the detective once again.

“Detective Yamamoto!” said Tomoko, in her best on-the-scene reporter voice. “We have just witnessed money change hands. Would it be fair to characterize this as payment for services rendered?” Detective Yamamoto paused for a moment as she attempted to decipher how this question would be twisted.

“Yes,” replied the detective after a moment, despite all of Satoshi's silent attempts to get her to remain quiet or ignore the question. Once the detective responded, Tomoko pulled the microphone back over to in front of her mouth and directed her gaze to the camera.

“You've heard it here, folks! We have just witnessed Detective Yamamoto receiving payment for servicing those two men!” Detective Yamamoto's hands clenched into fists as her face turned beat red. Once again, Satoshi found himself forced to intervene. He wrapped one arm around the detective's shoulder and made to start steering her away while blocking the view of the camera with the other hand.

~~~

The mood back in the detective's office was even worse than it was earlier in the morning. The more Detective Yamamoto seemed to think about the events that had transpired, the more upset she became. Unlike before, and Satoshi was bound to admit he was a little unnerved, Detective Yamamoto took to pacing around behind her desk.

“How many times is that damn reporter going to ambush me?” fretted the detective. Satoshi got the impression she was mainly speaking for her own benefit, but she talked loud enough that Satoshi felt he had to offer something.

“She'll probably get bored eventually,” said Satoshi. He wasn't sure if he truly believed that, in no small part because from Tomoko's perspective, Detective Yamamoto's reactions were pure gold. If Satoshi were a journalist, he would want the people he ambushed to act all flustered or furious in response to his questions. Detective Yamamoto didn't seem to take much comfort in Satoshi's words either.

“I can't wait for eventually!” the detective wailed. It was clear to Satoshi that she felt increasingly desperate. Satoshi sighed. It seemed like until something decisive was done, this would be a recurring issue.

“Next time,” said Satoshi, “instead of getting worked up and flustered, maybe you could just say 'no comment' and try leaving it at that?” The detective thought about it, but didn't seem convinced.

“I guess I could try,” she said finally, seemingly deciding that it couldn't make things any worse.

“Cheer up, detective,” said Satoshi. “I'm sure you can get through this.”

~~~

Satoshi, to his credit, sincerely believed that Detective Yamamoto could overcome this opposition, at least until he saw Tomoko's latest video.

“Detective SKANK,” the title declared. “Local detective paid for servicing TWO men SIMULTANEOUSLY.” Satoshi refrained from clicking on the video. Based on the thumbnail, which depicted the detective photoshopped to have very heavy makeup and much skimpier clothing, Satoshi was confident that this would be nothing short of a bottom-of-the-barrel hit piece. He sighed. Something would have to be done about this. Unfortunately, sitting in his apartment as he was, Satoshi felt there was little he could do, especially now.

WEDNESDAY

Detective Yamamoto's mood was better than when Satoshi had left yesterday evening, but it was still noticeably worse than normal, and only worsened given the complete lack of clients. Looking on the bright side, as he was wont to do, Satoshi had time to actually sit down and write. He was impeded, albeit only slightly, by the detective's foul mood, but in spite of that he still managed to write productively.

After nearly three hours of solid writing, Satoshi lifted his nose from the figurative grindstone and turned in the direction of the detective. She still sat behind her desk, more demurely than usual, and glowering absentmindedly at a can of beer.

“You know, Detective Yamamoto,” said Satoshi after clearing his throat. “Taking a walk usually helps me clear my head.” Detective Yamamoto redirected her gaze at her assistant and Satoshi briefly felt the ire she was showering on her half empty can. She seemed to consider the proposition.

“Alright,” she said, standing up.

~~~

The weather was nice enough, and it was this factor as much as anything else that Satoshi hoped would win out. Aside from drinking and reading comic books, Satoshi wasn't sure what the detective did for fun, but he felt certain that almost no one could turn down a nice walk in pleasant weather. Gratifyingly, Detective Yamamoto's mood seemed to improve slightly. It seemed to improve, of course, until the detective caught sight of a familiar figure in the distance. Immediately, her expression soured again.

“Tomoko Tachibana,” the detective growled as she narrowed her eyes. The reporter hadn't seemed to notice them yet, but Satoshi figured it would only be a matter of time before that changed for the worse.

“Come on, detective,” said Satoshi, tugging on her sleeve. “Let's walk somewhere else.” Detective Yamamoto seemed reluctant as if she wanted to make a fight of things. Slowly, she turned on her heel, following Satoshi, and began to walk away. Satoshi began to steer the detective in the direction of a nice local park. He started to think they might have been in the clear as they set foot in the park when a familiar, infuriating voice rang out from behind them.

“Detective Yamamoto!” called the voice. It was accompanied by the sound of feet on pavement rapidly closing the distance towards the duo. Both Detective Yamamoto and Satoshi turned slowly to see Tomoko Tachibana bearing down on them.

“Miss Tachibana,” the detective said icily, too quiet for any but Satoshi to hear as she glared daggers at the reporter.

“Detective,” said Tomoko, “do you have a moment for a few questions?”

“No comment,” replied the detective, staring straight ahead into the middle distance and attempting to keep a straight face.

“Wonderful!” tittered Tomoko, as if this had been the answer she wanted. “Detective, would you inform the viewing audience: are you wearing panties today, and if so, what color are they?”

“No comment,” growled the detective while attempting to maintain as neutral a facial expression as possible. Despite her enormous effort, her attempt was spoiled somewhat by a brief spark of activity that caught the corner of her eye. Detective Yamamoto turned her head to follow the activity, and after she didn’t respond to the journalist’s latest question, Tomoko turned around as well.

Across the park, there was an altercation. A young woman had been walking through the park before being accosted by a nondescript man, wearing dark clothing. The man had placed one hand on the woman’s shoulder in an attempt to push her away while his other hand clamped down on her purse. The woman, meanwhile, had latched both hands on her purse and had begun screaming for help.

Detective Yamamoto, followed an instant later by Satoshi, charged towards the purse-snatcher. After a moment, Tomoko, who now filmed the backs of Detective Yamamoto and her assistant also began to follow.

The purse-snatcher’s greater strength won out. He tore the purse away from the woman and gave her a decisive shove for good measure. The woman toppled over onto her rear and continued to scream for help.

“Help!” the woman shrieked. “He stole my purse!” The purse-snatcher, now keenly aware of all the eyes on him and the trio of people now running towards him, took off like a shot. He was fast, but Detective Yamamoto proved to be slightly faster. At the edge of the park, Detective Yamamoto caught up to the man, extending her hand and grabbing onto the baggy sweatshirt he wore. She stopped running and dug in her heels in an attempt to throw the thief off balance.

It worked, but not as well as she would have liked. The man’s momentum carried him forwards, yanking the detective off her feet and onto the ground. Changing tactics, she let go of the sweatshirt and instead grappled one of the man’s legs.

“Get off me!” the thief bellowed, now no longer running. He lashed out with his other leg and kicked the detective squarely in the face. Blood began to dribble out of the detective’s nose and out of a gash on her lip. The man only managed to kick twice before Satoshi caught up. Having been running at full tilt, Satoshi opted to tackle the man, knocking him entirely off his feet and pinning him.

Detective Yamamoto, now no longer under attack, stood up shakily. As Satoshi had pinned the man, she staggered over and, conscious of Tomoko and her camera swiftly approaching, picked up the stolen purse and raised it up as though it were the severed head from a slain adversary. Tomoko skidded to a stop as she approached.

“Detective Yamamoto, that was incredible!” gushed Tomoko, fixing her camera on the bloodied detective and raising her microphone for comment. “How did you manage to stop the purse-snatcher so quickly?”

“It comes with the territory,” said the detective, trying to affect an aloof tone of voice. “Now, if you’ll excuse me.” The detective limped over to the victim and handed back the purse. Tomoko followed her, ensuring she could get good footage of the detective and the victim.

“Thank you, Detective Yamamoto” said the poor woman tearfully. “How can I ever repay you?”

“It’s on the house, ma’am,” said the detective. “You didn’t come to me with a case, so how can I charge you?” Satoshi, who was watching from some distance away, still keeping the thief pinned until law enforcement could arrive, rolled his eyes. Detective Yamamoto had been so worked up over this journalist, but now that she was being asked favorable questions and was being heaped with attention, she was all for it. How typical.

THURSDAY

Both Satoshi and Detective Yamamoto felt a little worse for wear. Satoshi had gotten out of the ordeal with merely a few bumps and bruises. The detective, however, had to seek out medical attention. It turned out those two kicks to the face yielded some ugly bruising, but nothing more serious.

As fate would have it, Officer Ishioka was dispatched to handle the purse-snatcher. Satoshi thought she might have been faintly impressed that he and the detective had stopped a crime, but this possibility diminished when she got a look at the detective’s face. Satoshi didn’t feel the scolding was warranted, but he was glad it mostly wasn’t directed at him.

With the events of yesterday in mind, both Satoshi and the detective were looking forward to a relatively quiet day. Satoshi was delighted to see that the mood in the detective’s office was a lot more cheerful. Despite the dressings on her nose and cheek, Detective Yamamoto sat behind her desk, in her usual state of undress, with her characteristic can of beer.

“Good morning, detective,” said Satoshi.

“Morning, assistant,” replied the detective.

“Did you see Tomoko’s video?” Satoshi asked. He had seen it, and it was quite favorable to the detective. Detective Yamamoto just shook her head. Satoshi pulled out his computer and pulled up the video.

“Local Detective, Hero, thwarts purse snatching,” read the title. Detective Yamamoto smiled at the sight of it.

“It’s nice to be finally recognized,” she said leaning back in her chair. At that moment, there was a knock on the door.

“Come in!” hollered the detective. Satoshi heard the door open and shut. A few moments later, a familiar figure entered the detective’s office.

“Good morning, detective!” said Tomoko Tachibana cheerfully. She was carrying her microphone and camera as she always did. “Do you have any interesting cases today?” The appearance of the reporter seemed to puncture the detective’s good mood. She leaned forward in her seat again and adopted a neutral expression.

 “No comment.”