Chapter 16:
Romeo Plus Juliet Minus Shotguns
The Girl From The Grocery Store Across The Street Is (NOT!) A Robot, She's Just Incredibly, Incredibly, Incredibly WEIRD!
“Tanaka!? What the fu—”
“Nope, nope, nope, nope.” I slammed the bathroom door shut and could do nothing but stand frozen for a few moments.
I hadn’t seen anything.
I had observed everything—which made the whole thing even more, let’s say 'embarrassing' for lack of a better word—no, let’s just say 'worse.'
Because the problem—aside from the incident itself—lies in the small-but-huge difference between those two terms.
For example.
You 'see' people all the time, everywhere. Does anyone remember the face of the fourth person who got on the bus six Saturdays ago? No.
Does anyone remember what the twelfth person who got off at the same train station was wearing? Also no.
Because we’re just seeing. That occupies a momentary space.
Now, observing is different. A stupid but useful example is those people who spend their lives birdwatching. Yeah, they’re 'seeing' the birds—at a glance that’s what it looks like—but I can guarantee without any margin of error that those people can distinguish thirty-two different bird species just by 'seeing' them because they’ve already 'observed' them before.
And if this whole monologue is getting not only horribly long but also redundant, it’s simply because my head wouldn’t stop replaying that image over and over.
Like when a film reel breaks and keeps playing the same three frames on loop.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with that, but add that it was a mistake.
That it happened because I’m pretty sure what Shizue said was something like 'Kiri is showering' and I didn’t hear it in the moment.
That not only did the above happen, but on top of that I was in her house… well, then I’d better stop thinking because my head was probably giving off more steam than the bathroom.
“S-Shizue, nice to meet you, I need to get back to my apartment.” I said while speed walking past her so robotically fast it probably looked like I was sliding across the floor.
“This feels like a scene from a romantic comedy…” she said, sipping her tea while following me with her eyes.
“I wouldn’t be seeing the ‘comedy’ in any of this.” I was waiting for Shizue to open the door so I could finally leave, with roughly the same anticipation as a tennis ball right before it bounces off the racket.
“You didn’t say anything about the ‘romantic’ part, Tanaka.”
“NOT the time for verbal games…”
“You’re taking this way too seriously, Tanaka. These are young people things.”
“I don’t think that’s really the right phrase…”
“They’re just things that happen.” She said, setting the tea on the table and heading toward the door so she could—finally—let me out. And I want to clarify that for some reason she was now moving like an actual old lady. “Once, with my husband we were—”
“No, don’t even start.” I said, grabbing her shoulders. “I know what you’re about to do. You’re going to tell me a similar anecdote from your youth and trust me, I don’t want to hear it, much less have that image burned into my mind.”
“It’s natural, everyone has—”
“I-don’t-want-to-hear-it.”
One part of me was terrified of ending up hearing some sexual anecdote about Kiri’s grandma, which would undoubtedly leave me with a psychological scar nothing could remove.
The other part just wanted to get the hell out as fast as possible—not because of the first thing, but because of the second thing I forgot to mention, which is basically the fact that Kiri could walk out of the bathroom at any moment and in my current state I didn’t want a double assault on my brain.
“By the way… Shizue…” I said, turning around. “The store is starting to work…”
“I know. Kiri mentioned it.”
“And you didn’t think that was something you could tell me?”
“Why tell you something she told me that you already know? Validation?”
“No, not at all, I just—Haa… forget it. I plan to pay back the money you put into the store.”
“Years of investment in months?”
“I wasn’t being that literal.”
“I was.”
“If you frame it as a challenge, then I accept.” I said, running my hand through my hair. “Anyway… that was all I needed to say.”
“Tanaka.”
“Yeah?”
“What’s the difference? Whether the store functions properly or my money keeps it open, it doesn’t change the overall picture.”
“I just don’t think it’s fair.”
“Oh… another soap opera line.” She answered with a small laugh. “Thanks for worrying about an old lady.”
“I never said it was for you…” I said while walking toward my apartment.
“My granddaughter is going to keep being like this, even if the store works the way it should, Tanaka.”
“I know, I know…” I continued walking. “But at least the place she feels is hers will be genuinely hers and not held up by an old lady.”
“Shizue.”
“Right.”
“Nope, nope, nope, nope.” I slammed the bathroom door shut and could do nothing but stand frozen for a few moments.
I hadn’t seen anything.
I had observed everything—which made the whole thing even more, let’s say 'embarrassing' for lack of a better word—no, let’s just say 'worse.'
Because the problem—aside from the incident itself—lies in the small-but-huge difference between those two terms.
For example.
You 'see' people all the time, everywhere. Does anyone remember the face of the fourth person who got on the bus six Saturdays ago? No.
Does anyone remember what the twelfth person who got off at the same train station was wearing? Also no.
Because we’re just seeing. That occupies a momentary space.
Now, observing is different. A stupid but useful example is those people who spend their lives birdwatching. Yeah, they’re 'seeing' the birds—at a glance that’s what it looks like—but I can guarantee without any margin of error that those people can distinguish thirty-two different bird species just by 'seeing' them because they’ve already 'observed' them before.
And if this whole monologue is getting not only horribly long but also redundant, it’s simply because my head wouldn’t stop replaying that image over and over.
Like when a film reel breaks and keeps playing the same three frames on loop.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with that, but add that it was a mistake.
That it happened because I’m pretty sure what Shizue said was something like 'Kiri is showering' and I didn’t hear it in the moment.
That not only did the above happen, but on top of that I was in her house… well, then I’d better stop thinking because my head was probably giving off more steam than the bathroom.
“S-Shizue, nice to meet you, I need to get back to my apartment.” I said while speed walking past her so robotically fast it probably looked like I was sliding across the floor.
“This feels like a scene from a romantic comedy…” she said, sipping her tea while following me with her eyes.
“I wouldn’t be seeing the ‘comedy’ in any of this.” I was waiting for Shizue to open the door so I could finally leave, with roughly the same anticipation as a tennis ball right before it bounces off the racket.
“You didn’t say anything about the ‘romantic’ part, Tanaka.”
“NOT the time for verbal games…”
“You’re taking this way too seriously, Tanaka. These are young people things.”
“I don’t think that’s really the right phrase…”
“They’re just things that happen.” She said, setting the tea on the table and heading toward the door so she could—finally—let me out. And I want to clarify that for some reason she was now moving like an actual old lady. “Once, with my husband we were—”
“No, don’t even start.” I said, grabbing her shoulders. “I know what you’re about to do. You’re going to tell me a similar anecdote from your youth and trust me, I don’t want to hear it, much less have that image burned into my mind.”
“It’s natural, everyone has—”
“I-don’t-want-to-hear-it.”
One part of me was terrified of ending up hearing some sexual anecdote about Kiri’s grandma, which would undoubtedly leave me with a psychological scar nothing could remove.
The other part just wanted to get the hell out as fast as possible—not because of the first thing, but because of the second thing I forgot to mention, which is basically the fact that Kiri could walk out of the bathroom at any moment and in my current state I didn’t want a double assault on my brain.
“By the way… Shizue…” I said, turning around. “The store is starting to work…”
“I know. Kiri mentioned it.”
“And you didn’t think that was something you could tell me?”
“Why tell you something she told me that you already know? Validation?”
“No, not at all, I just—Haa… forget it. I plan to pay back the money you put into the store.”
“Years of investment in months?”
“I wasn’t being that literal.”
“I was.”
“If you frame it as a challenge, then I accept.” I said, running my hand through my hair. “Anyway… that was all I needed to say.”
“Tanaka.”
“Yeah?”
“What’s the difference? Whether the store functions properly or my money keeps it open, it doesn’t change the overall picture.”
“I just don’t think it’s fair.”
“Oh… another soap opera line.” She answered with a small laugh. “Thanks for worrying about an old lady.”
“I never said it was for you…” I said while walking toward my apartment.
“My granddaughter is going to keep being like this, even if the store works the way it should, Tanaka.”
“I know, I know…” I continued walking. “But at least the place she feels is hers will be genuinely hers and not held up by an old lady.”
“Shizue.”
“Right.”
Sometimes, depending on the situation, you feel—let’s say—'empowered' and speak without really having an idea.Was I capable of getting all that money? Of course not.
Was I going to try? Absolutely.
Would it do any good? Debatable.
Honestly I wasn’t speaking just for Kiri. I was speaking for myself—not because I felt reflected or needed some symbolic medal… it’s just that if I didn’t put something in my brain… well…
I couldn’t stop thinking about how Kiri’s body looked— No.
Seriously, I never thought she would look— Stop.
I mean, her skin was— Brain, I’m about to smash my skull against the wall, last warning.
The first thing I did after collapsing onto the futon—which reminded me it was now almost as thin as a sheet of paper—was text Kiri that I wasn’t coming to work today.
I left my phone silenced under the pillow, though I couldn’t help wondering if today’s 'date' still existed within the realm of possibilities. I could avoid answering that question myself and also avoid any kind of justification with Kiri about what happened.
Yes, I could throw Shizue under the bus (metaphorically... for now), but that didn’t feel right.
I understood both sides. Surely it must be hard for her to deal with whatever-it-is Kiri has.They always say the ones who 'suffer' the most are third parties. Lie.
Back to differences—the point is simple.
If you break your leg, who suffers more—you or your friend who was recording a video of you trying to jump fourteen stairs?
If that sounds too specific, it’s because I left a little anecdote in my analysis.
I fell asleep almost instantly. I guess that’s the advantage of 24 hours without sleep plus a mental boxing match against Shizue.
Falling asleep wasn’t hard.
Waking up was.
I had a few ideas for dates, though all of them involved leaving the 'sacred space,' so I crossed them out as fast as I thought them. It would definitely be in the store, but there were alternatives within that limitation, and one in particular was that it still wasn’t cold at night, so... that.
Unfortunately for me, I have a tendency to check my phone the second I wake up, which isn’t a problem in itself—it’s a problem when you sent a message you don’t want to see the reply to.
That makes you accidentally open the chat, which marks the message as 'seen,' and if the other person is chronically glued to their phone like it’s symbiosis, they’ll notice in very little time.
[Day deducted from your pay.]
That was all she’d sent as a reply.
[Sorry, sorry, I should’ve given more notice]
[I was going to deduct the day for absence regardless of how much notice you gave.]
[NOT surprised… By the way… do I need to be there at 20:25 so you close at 20:30 and leave at 20:35?]
[… You’re talking about the date?]
[Yes.]
[… I thought you were going to cancel it…]
[Why would I cancel it?]
[This morning… the bathroom… you…]
[Yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw you naked.] I shouldn’t be that direct.
[Tanaka… … (ㆆ_ㆆ)… … Don’t be so direct… … …] Ding, I was right.
[Sorry.]
[You’re lying.]
[Like you wouldn’t believe.]
[So… … … you saw me?]
[Yes, Kiri.]
[And… … …]
[And?]
[I don’t know, Tanaka. Say something about it.]
[Uhm… do you like anime?]
[What does that have to do with anything? (≖_≖ )]
[Just asking…]
[A little. Why?]
[Let’s say, suppose this was an anime. Seeing you would’ve given me one of those humanly impossible nosebleeds.]
[HUH?... … …(˶°ㅁ°)!! … … TANAKA! ( ˶>˶˶<˶)]
Was I going to try? Absolutely.
Would it do any good? Debatable.
Honestly I wasn’t speaking just for Kiri. I was speaking for myself—not because I felt reflected or needed some symbolic medal… it’s just that if I didn’t put something in my brain… well…
I couldn’t stop thinking about how Kiri’s body looked— No.
Seriously, I never thought she would look— Stop.
I mean, her skin was— Brain, I’m about to smash my skull against the wall, last warning.
The first thing I did after collapsing onto the futon—which reminded me it was now almost as thin as a sheet of paper—was text Kiri that I wasn’t coming to work today.
I left my phone silenced under the pillow, though I couldn’t help wondering if today’s 'date' still existed within the realm of possibilities. I could avoid answering that question myself and also avoid any kind of justification with Kiri about what happened.
Yes, I could throw Shizue under the bus (metaphorically... for now), but that didn’t feel right.
I understood both sides. Surely it must be hard for her to deal with whatever-it-is Kiri has.They always say the ones who 'suffer' the most are third parties. Lie.
Back to differences—the point is simple.
If you break your leg, who suffers more—you or your friend who was recording a video of you trying to jump fourteen stairs?
If that sounds too specific, it’s because I left a little anecdote in my analysis.
I fell asleep almost instantly. I guess that’s the advantage of 24 hours without sleep plus a mental boxing match against Shizue.
Falling asleep wasn’t hard.
Waking up was.
I had a few ideas for dates, though all of them involved leaving the 'sacred space,' so I crossed them out as fast as I thought them. It would definitely be in the store, but there were alternatives within that limitation, and one in particular was that it still wasn’t cold at night, so... that.
Unfortunately for me, I have a tendency to check my phone the second I wake up, which isn’t a problem in itself—it’s a problem when you sent a message you don’t want to see the reply to.
That makes you accidentally open the chat, which marks the message as 'seen,' and if the other person is chronically glued to their phone like it’s symbiosis, they’ll notice in very little time.
[Day deducted from your pay.]
That was all she’d sent as a reply.
[Sorry, sorry, I should’ve given more notice]
[I was going to deduct the day for absence regardless of how much notice you gave.]
[NOT surprised… By the way… do I need to be there at 20:25 so you close at 20:30 and leave at 20:35?]
[… You’re talking about the date?]
[Yes.]
[… I thought you were going to cancel it…]
[Why would I cancel it?]
[This morning… the bathroom… you…]
[Yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw you naked.] I shouldn’t be that direct.
[Tanaka… … (ㆆ_ㆆ)… … Don’t be so direct… … …] Ding, I was right.
[Sorry.]
[You’re lying.]
[Like you wouldn’t believe.]
[So… … … you saw me?]
[Yes, Kiri.]
[And… … …]
[And?]
[I don’t know, Tanaka. Say something about it.]
[Uhm… do you like anime?]
[What does that have to do with anything? (≖_≖ )]
[Just asking…]
[A little. Why?]
[Let’s say, suppose this was an anime. Seeing you would’ve given me one of those humanly impossible nosebleeds.]
[HUH?... … …(˶°ㅁ°)!! … … TANAKA! ( ˶>˶˶<˶)]
Please sign in to leave a comment.