Chapter 24: Small talk

-9 MONTHS REMAIN-

Leaving Friedhof was surprisingly just as easy as walking in. The zombies outside did not bother the party as they left Noah’s house. Without receiving any orders from Noah or the larger zombie, they more or less didn’t care that the enemy walked right beside them. It’s not like they could think on their own anyway. Before they left, the party carefully removed Aurora’s father from the freezer with the intention of giving him a proper burial. Aurora and Ulric insisted on finding the perfect spot to lay their loved one to rest and stubbornly carried Helson until the two of them finally came to an agreement. Miryam and Lilith were so tired by that point that they were just glad it was over. Lilith had decided to join the original trio on their journey. She didn’t really have a reason why, just that they helped her and she wanted to help, or at least be with, them. Much to Aurora’s surprise, Ulric wasn’t the one to make the initial offer. Lilith had just started following them like a lost puppy until she finally asked if that was okay for her to do. There was no resistance. So instead of awkwardly following the group several paces back, she slightly less awkwardly followed directly behind them. Lilith couldn’t help but feel out of place. To her, this was a group with an already established dynamic that she was haphazardly inserting herself into. They interacted so naturally with each other that Lilith found it hard to believe they had met only a month or two ago. The trio did their best to try and include Lilith and get to know her, but she was too timid to give anything more than a quick, short response. How long until they betray her? How long until they abandon her? They insisted they didn’t mind the fact that she’s half vampire, but Lilith found that quite hard to believe. That was also why she felt so out of place. She’s nocturnal, or at least the rare crepuscular. They’re all diurnal. They were different. Different on a fundamental level. Different species. Them, human. Her, a monster. That’s what she’s been told her whole life. She is nothing more than a monster. Not half human. Not a woman. Not a Lovelace. Just a monster.

“What do you think, Lilith?” Aurora asked, spinning around to walk backwards. Lilith hadn’t been paying attention to the conversation. She assumed, as usual, that she wasn’t supposed to be a part of it. She thought that every time the group started talking, despite the fact they always asked for her input.

“I’m sorry?” She said quietly, head hung a little low.

“If you had a spirit animal like Ulric, what do you think it would be?” She repeated. Lilith was so lost in her own thoughts, so deeply entangled with her anxieties that she didn’t even notice that Miryam was riding atop Ursa. She hugged it tightly.

“I want to be something pretty and elegant. Like a butterfly.” Miryam said, not sitting up. She looked like she was about to fall asleep.

“I’ve heard stories about a frog that has enough poison to kill over a dozen men.” Aurora blushed. She was swooning over a frog like it was some innocent fairytale love. Lilith looked to Ulric. She expected him to chime in with an answer of his own; maybe a desire to switch animals or maybe an answer of acceptance. But he didn't say anything. There was a subtle expression on his face, a certain look to his eyes. Grief? Shame? Overall discomfort? It wasn't much, not enough for anyone else to notice, but Lilith could tell he wasn't enjoying the conversation. 

"I don't know." She shrugged. "I haven't given it much thought, sorry." 

"Come on." Aurora egged on. "You don't have any idea?" Lilith shrugged again and glanced away. 

"To my understanding, nocturnals don't get a lot of options in that field. Odds are I'd be a bat." Aurora's smile dropped. She wasn't the best at social cues, but even she could tell something was wrong. She slowed her pace to drop further back in the group. Lilith tried to slow down with her to stay behind, but Aurora pivoted herself to walk alongside her. 

"Hey." She started. She kept her voice low and spoke in a more serious manner, while still keeping a sense of sweetness. "Is something wrong?" Lilith tried her best to avoid eye contact.

"I... I uh... I don't... no nothing's..." She stumbled. 

"You can tell me." Aurora smiled. "I helped you escape and let you take a chunk out of my arm. That has to count towards some level of friendship, right?" Lilith sighed. There was a lot on her mind. Her head was filled with all kinds of confusion and self-doubt. If she was going to open up to Aurora, even just a little bit, she had no idea where to start. She would just have to say the first thing on her mind. 

"I... How old is the child?" She asked quickly. Aurora looked at her perplexed. Definitely not what she was expecting her to say. 

"Miryam? Well, she's... she's uhh..." Now Aurora was stumbling over her words. It was a question she didn't expect, but it should still be an easy one to answer. How old was Miryam? Simple. Straightforward. She had to have said it before, right? Aurora stared at the girl. "I don't know, actually." 

"I'm fifteen." Miryam said, startling the other girls. How did she hear their conversation? She didn't even lift her head up or open her eyes to respond. She answered so casually. 

"Fifteen?!" The other three all cried out in unison. Even Ulric was taken aback. The answer did make some logical sense. Miryam's mother died ten years ago, so she had to be at least that old. But the news came as a shock because she never looked or acted that old. 

"I thought she was like... eight?" Aurora said, dumbfounded. She quickened her pace to grab Ulric by the ear and dragged him back to Lilith. Ursa looked back curiously, but understood the assignment to keep Miryam out of earshot. “How did we not know she was fifteen?” Aurora whispered. 

“I don’t know? She looks young. She acts young. I assumed she was young. Any weirdness with her age I just brushed off as faulty memory or an exaggeration.”

“Symptom of her childhood? She had it rough and was forced to grow up pretty fast. Maybe her mind is trying to play catch up? But that doesn’t explain her looks.” At this point, Aurora was just thinking out loud. It was kind of fascinating to Lilith. “Is this a result of light magic?” Ulric shook his head.

“There are rumors, but those have always been propaganda to make light magic more appealing. I have heard of spirit animals affecting the body in this sort of way. The soul seems to, for a lack of a better word, make up certain abilities related to the animal. Those often present physical changes to the host. However Miryam doesn’t have a spirit animal, not one that we know of.” 

“I apologize for bringing this up.” Lilith said hanging her head further. Aurora and Ulric did their best to reassure her but to little effect. She felt that she had damaged their dynamic. Why was she even here? The conversation died out relatively quickly. They didn’t have any new or useful information so they weren’t getting any closer to an answer. Ulric did mention offhandedly that people who awakened a spirit animal were more likely to pass that strength to their children. That piqued Aurora’s interest, but she dismissed it when she remembered that Ulric’s power wasn’t as natural as she initially thought. The group continued their journey down the path, eventually coming across a clearing in the Astral Verdant. The landscape became hilly. It looked more like a grassland than a simple clearing, but this dramatic shift told Ulric that they were almost out of the vast forest. The group looked over the new terrain with awe. It was unmistakably beautiful. One thing in particular made Aurora very excited, something she had been waiting a long time to see. 

“A river! A clean river!” She pointed gleefully.