Chapter 1:

1

I Didn’t Mean To Kill My Beloved Wife


Mornings came quietly to the Shibata house.

The sun had not yet fully climbed above the neighboring rooftops, but pale light already slipped through the kitchen windows, spreading gently across the polished floorboards. Dust never lingered long enough here to catch the light. Naoki had seen to that.

He stood in the center of the kitchen for a moment, hands resting on his hips, inspecting the room with quiet satisfaction.

Everything was where it belonged, he thought.

The counter had been wiped twice after breakfast preparation. A faint scent of citrus cleaner lingered in the air. The rice cooker bubbled softly on the corner of the counter. The steam vent releasing slow breaths into the morning. A small cutting board lay beside the sink, all washed and dried after slicing fruit.

The house had not always looked like this.

When Hana was born, chaos arrived with her.

For weeks bottles collected in corners, laundry appeared from nowhere, and sleep came in fragments that left the world blurred at the edges. Naoki remembered those days clearly. Aiko had been exhausted beyond words. Her shoulders were heavy with the impossible weight of balancing motherhood, losing her own mother and helping at the family butchers in stead of her mother.

So Naoki had stepped forward.

Slowly and patiently, he learned housekeeping. How to fold laundry so the fabric felt smooth between the fingers. How to sweep a floor without waking a sleeping baby. How to cook three meals a day while rocking a cradle with his foot.

He found that he liked it.

There was a quiet satisfaction in maintaining a home that felt peaceful when someone walked through the door.

Naoki wiped the kitchen counter one last time before moving toward the living room.

The morning air still carried the faint coolness of night, so he slid the window open slightly to let fresh air drift inside. Outside, a neighbor watered her small garden while the distant sound of a delivery scooter buzzed down the street.

He returned to the small cradle beside the sofa.

Hana stirred when his shadow fell across her.

Her tiny face scrunched for a moment before relaxing again. Her eyelids fluttered withoutopening. Naoki crouched beside her and gently adjusted the blanket tucked around her small body.

“Good morning,” he whispered.

Her hand opened briefly, ten tiny fingers stretched towards nothing.

Naoki felt that familiar warmth in his chest, yet very morning it still surprised him.

Every morning it felt like something fragile and precious had been placed into his care. He leaned down and brushed a kiss against Hana’s forehead before standing again.

From the hallway came the sound of footsteps.

Aiko appeared moments later.

Her hair fell loosely around her shoulders, still tangled from sleep. The night gown she wore looked slightly wrinkled from being pulled on too quickly. Her expression carried a faint tension of someone who had not slept enough.

Naoki’s face lit up immediately. “Good morning.”

Aiko squinted slightly at the light filling the room.

“You’re cheerful,” she said with rough voice.

Naoki stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her.

The hug was warm and immediate. He lifted her slightly off her feet before settling again. Aiko made a small sound of protest, but she didn’t pull away.

Naoki pressed his cheek against her hair. “You smell like sleep.”

“I am sleep,” she muttered in a daze.

He laughed softly as he admired his wife’s silhouette and drool-streaked face.

Aiko stepped away and stretched her shoulders. She slowly moved towards the kitchen. She opened the refrigerator and grabbed a yogurt and a bottle of water before sitting at the table.

Naoki placed a plate in front of her. Eggs, sliced fruit, and toast.

“You didn’t have to—”

“You have a full shift ahead. Eat.”

She took a bite without further protest. While she ate, Hana began to fuss quietly in her cradle. Aiko glanced over.

“Did she finish the bottle?”

“Half of it.”

Naoki lifted the baby carefully and passed her to Aiko.

She settled Hana against her chest and adjusted her shirt without ceremony, letting the baby latch instinctively. The tension in Aiko’s face softened slightly as Hana fed.

For a moment the kitchen grew completely quiet except for the small rhythmic sounds of Hana drinking. Aiko glanced toward the empty bottle sitting on the counter.

“You didn’t lay her down while feeding, right?”

Naoki shook his head. “Of course not.”

She gave him a look anyway. “You’d be surprised how many parents think that’s fine. Babies shouldn’t feed lying flat. It affects swallowing and breathing. Babies can aspirate. It leads to pneumonia.”

“I know. You told me a few times already.”

“Even adults shouldn’t eat lying down.”

Naoki smiled gently. “I promise. Upright at all times.”

She studied his face for another second before relaxing again. Naoki had learned that tone over the years. Bringing her work etiquette at home. He found it charming.

When Hana finished feeding, Aiko burped her skillfully before placing her back in Naoki’s arms.

“She’s getting heavier.”

Naoki rocked the baby gently while Aiko finished the last of her breakfast.

“I can pack lunch for you. Something light.” he said casually. 

Aiko shook her head. “I’ll eat with the staff.”

“I don’t mind cooking.”

“I know. I am grateful.”

She stood and rinsed her bowl quickly before placing it beside the sink.

“Someone can grab something for me from the cafeteria.”

Naoki hesitated. “But hospital food—”

“I’ll survive.”

She slipped on her running shoes near the door. Naoki opened his eyes in disbelief.

“You’re leaving this early? And you’re jogging again? But you didn’t get enough sleep last night?”

“It wakes me up better than coffee.”

He stepped closer to hug her. “At least let me drive you.”

Aiko shook her head. “No need.”

She tied her hair tighter and grabbed her bag. Naoki leaned forward and kissed her cheek.

“You work too hard.”

Aiko gave him a small sideways smile. “Don’t clean too much.”

“Someone has to keep this place beautiful.”

She glanced around the spotless room. “True. I am lucky to have you.”

Hana made a small cooing noise in Naoki’s arms. Aiko leaned down and kissed the baby once more before opening the door.

“I’ll see you tonight.”

Naoki nodded. “Be safe.”

The door closed behind her. 

The sound of her footsteps faded quickly as she began jogging down the quiet street. Naoki stood in the doorway for a moment with Hana resting against his shoulder.

“What do you want to do today Hana?”

IronFart
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