Guitar Hero

Linda made her way up the steep driveway to Mike's garage. The door was open and the studio sign was out, illuminated by a spotlight. She could hear the muffled low frequency boom of bass and drums, leaking out of the garage. She reached the studio door and hit the buzzer.

Linda was feeling very nervous. She hadn't felt like this coming to vocal recording sessions with Mike. Guitar wasn't her number one thing and she had been practicing hard. She'd put herself under more pressure by trying to learn a song from the Girlfriend In Your Luggage set list at the last minute.

She was aware that Mike had been gently trying to discourage her. It was a new experience for her having to run so hard after a guy she had befriended, normally if she decided to take things further they would jump at the chance.

Joining a band as a guitarist just to stay close to him. It really was a bit desperate.

***

Mike opened the studio door.

"Hi Linda, come on through."

"Good evening, Mike."

Linda entered. She had a guitar case slung over her shoulder.

"You know Xiang Ling of course. This is Danielle Peterson our bass player."

Linda's eyes fixed on the tall dark haired woman. The look was returned by piercing green eyes.

Linda's heart sank. The woman looked like a pro. She could maybe, just, almost, wing it with Mike and Xiang Ling, but Peterson wouldn't be fooled.

"Hello." Linda mumbled and looked away. She made her way to the "stage" area and unslung her guitar case and started setting up.

"That's a nice looking guitar, Linda." Danielle noted.

"It's nothing special, just a standard USA made Strat. It's not vintage or anything."

"Still, they are quite pricey these days."

"I've had it for a while, I don't play it much. I usually play my acoustic. I'm a bit out of practice with an electric," Linda admitted.

Linda started tuning up with a clip on tuner. She got out her 3 pedals and hooked them up.

"Do you need a guitar amp or are you okay going through an amp simulator plugin on the DAW?" Mike enquired.

"If it's not too much bother, can I use an amp?"

Mike grabbed a small Roland Cube guitar amp and took it over to Linda.

Linda made an experimental strum, then turned the amp gain way down.

"I'd like to play and sing one of my own songs first. I've tried to learn Rose from your set list, just the rhythm guitar part. So I'll try and play that too. I hope you won't judge me on my tone, I don't have a lot of FX pedals."

"That's fine Linda. We really just want to see basic guitar competency. We're not expecting Jimi Hendrix."

Linda set up a clean tone and punched the chorus pedal. She launched into her own song, "Sleep Warm With Me."

Danielle was keenly watching Linda's technique. Linda's fretting hand was competently moving from chord to chord without hesitation and she wasn't looking down. Linda's strumming was smooth and even, keeping a steady tempo. Danielle surmised that Linda had played this song many times before. Her singing was divine, but she wasn't auditioning as a singer.

"That's great Linda." Mike praised her.

"Thanks Mike."

"Do you need a backing track for Rose?"

"I've got the actual track loaded into my looper pedal, I was just going to play along."

"I can quickly set up a version without the guitar on the DAW if you like."

"Why don't we just play it with her live," Danielle suggested.

"We don't want to pressure her like that, Danielle."

Linda sighed internally. Thank goodness Mike had stood up for her. Danielle wanted to really test her mettle.

"If it's not too much trouble, Mike. Could you load the file into my pedal so I can start it myself?"

"Just a few mouse clicks required."

Mike went over to the studio computer and started rendering the backing track.

"How does the pedal interface? USB?"

"Yes, it just shows up as a drive and you can drag files onto it."

"Too easy."

Singing her own song had calmed Linda down a bit, but only narrowly missing being forced to perform with the band and the delay caused by messing around with the backing track had got her anxiety rising again.

Linda fiddled with her overdrive/distortion pedal in an effort get a tone suitable for the chugging rhythm guitar part.

"Okay, Rose."

Linda clicked the looper pedal and launched into the intro. She was struggling a little with the palm muting but managed to pull it off. She didn't quite cleanly fret the next chord, but recovered.

Danielle observed that Linda seemed very nervous. She felt sympathy for her.

Linda struggled through to the end with only a few minor errors.

"Thanks Linda, that was good. We won't keep you hanging. We'll have a quick discussion in the studio control booth and let you know."

Mike, Xiang Ling and Danielle retired to the control room and closed the door.

Linda felt all the strength go out of her legs. Never in all her performing career had she been so stressed out. She grabbed a seat at the workbench. Through the control room glass she could see Mike gesturing about something. It seemed like it wasn't going to be a cut and dried decision. They were debating something.

I hate this.

***

"So what do we think," Mike began.

"I vote yes." Danielle responded. "She has obviously at some point in her career spent the time required to master guitar basics. I think she has room to grow as a guitarist if she sticks at it. The poor girl looked terrified during Rose, I can forgive her fluffing a few notes. Besides she's very cute."

"You weren't helping any with that outfit Danielle," Xiang Ling spoke up.

"I regret it already. I'll wear something more elegant and charming next time!"

"What about you, Xiang Ling?" Mike queried.

"She's good enough and can improve. I'm interested in how this Linda v Danielle thing pans out, or is it Linda x Danielle?"

"Oh ho, ho, Xiang Ling, you're so quick on the uptake."

"I'm pretty sure she's straight." Xiang Ling put on her pouting face.

"As for me. I'll abstain."

"Typical cowardly fence sitter!" Xiang Ling exclaimed.

"Why won't you vote for her?" Danielle asked.

"I don't think her motivation for joining the band is on the level."

"That's more your problem than her's. You should have told her sooner that she won't get what she wants from you. You can't keep running from every woman that has feelings for you."

"Anyway, the band has spoken 2 votes to zero. Linda is in. Let's go put her out of her misery."

***

They came out of the control room. Mike went over to Linda.

"Congrats, you're in."

"You seemed to be discussing it for a while, was someone against it?"

"2 votes to zero," Danielle answered.

"Someone didn't vote?"

"Mike recused himself."

"Oh."

Linda didn't know what to think about that. The black clad punk bitch must have thought she was okay though.

"Where to from here then? I guess I need to learn the rest of your songs."

"We usually hold band practice in the evenings during the week. Danielle has been coming round for dinner straight after work and we start practice after we eat."

"That works for me most of the time, but I might have to skip if I have evening session work."

"That's okay, as I've said before it's just a garage band, mostly just for fun. Would you like to play through Rose with us now?"

"No, honestly I'm beat. I was stressing out all day yesterday about the audition and now it's caught up with me. I'll be going home now. Will you have a practice tomorrow?"

"Danielle?"

"No, can we make it the day after?"

"Thursday okay, Linda?"

"Yes, I'm available."

Linda started packing up her gear.

"Wait, before you go can I take some photos for the band web page?" Mike asked.

"Sure."

"You two too, Danielle grab the bass. A band group shot."

Mike grabbed his gimbal from a draw and set it up like a mini tripod for his phone. He streamed the camera feed to the studio Mac screen.

"Danielle and Linda, back to back rocking out pose please. Xiang Ling sticks up, like you're about to whale on the cymbals."

Mike posed behind his keyboard while using the gimbal remote control to frame the shot.

"That's great."

Mike took a few shots of slightly different poses.

"Okay, I'll take a few individual shots, with some cheesy poses."

Mike retrieved his phone from the gimbal.

"Okay, Danielle throw a peace sign."

"So you're going for the full manga heroine photo booth look?"

"Exactly!"

Danielle snorted and posed as requested, showing an enigmatic smile.

"Linda can you make a heart shape?"

Mike demonstrated.

"Oh, okay."

Linda gave her best sparkly model smile and threw the heart shape.

"Xiang Ling, strike some kind of pose with a drumstick."

Xiang Ling struck a serious looking pose, saluting with the drumstick.

"Can someone take one of me?"

"I'll do it, Mike." Linda took Mike's phone.

"Hang on, I need to do something so I don't look so boring."

Mike cast his eyes around the studio and alighted on a keytar resting on a guitar stand.

He grabbed it and posed like he was performing an epic solo.

"Okay this should do."

Linda snapped the photo.

"That will do, we shouldn't hold Linda up any longer."

"You looked kinda cool with that keytar, Mike. You should perform with it at our next gig," Danielle suggested.

"That's a big no, I'm having enough trouble playing as it is without prancing around the stage."

Linda resumed packing up and slung her guitar case over her shoulder.

"I'll see you to your car."

Mike grabbed a torch from the workbench and walked with her to the door.

"It's dark and the drive is a bit steep."

Mike offered her his arm.

"You didn't warn me you had a bass player already."

"I didn't want to worry you."

"She seems a bit formidable. Does she play well?"

"She's a bit of a free spirit. I'm sure she dressed in that stage costume from her old band just to play mind games with you. That's not what she usually wears to practice. She's certainly a pro bass player. She says her old band was just some university friends but I think she is downplaying it. She hasn't told me who they were."

"A woman of mystery then. Where did you find her?"

"You won't believe this, she is the co-owner of the games company I work for."

"Really? So you knew her already."

"I really hadn't had much to do with her recently because I mainly work from home. She had no idea I had a studio and was involved with music. I didn't know she used to play bass."

"How did you get talking about music?"

"We were talking about AI and music software. I invited her to the studio to see Xiang Ling. She spotted my bass and asked to have a go, then she started really popping off."

They had long since reached Linda's car.

"Ah well, I shouldn't keep you Mike."

"Goodnight Linda, have a safe trip home."

Mike returned to the house.

"Ready for supper, Danielle?"

"Of course!"

"I'll stay down here and work on my song, Mike."

"Okay, I'll head to bed once Danielle leaves."

Mike and Danielle went upstairs to the kitchen.

Mike fetched some fresh glasses and the bottle of noble rot."

"What's for supper?"

"Hmm, I have a vegan chocolate cake."

Mike cut two slices and returned with some plates and cake forks.

"Do you want some more wine? Will you be okay to drive?"

"I'd love some, but can I stay the night?"

"If you're happy to crash on a futon on the studio tatami mats."

"I was hoping for a better offer than that."

"Sorry, the spare room is Xiang Ling's, you'd have to ask her if she want's to share."

"I love matching wits with you Mike. You know exactly what's going on and play everything straight anyway. I'll ask Xiang Ling, if that's the way you want to play it."

"Okay, that's enough, no more wine for you. You can go home after you finish your cake."

"Kill Joy."

"You'll thank me in the morning. Don't you have a lunch date with Xiang Ling tomorrow anyway?"

"Ah common sense strikes."

Danielle finished her cake.

"Walk me to my car? No?"

"With pleasure."

Mike offered his hand. Danielle took it and they headed out the front door.

"You're so annoying, Mike. You manage to deflect my overtures like it's nothing and then you flirt like this."

"Can't friends hold hands? I don't want to be cold to you."

"So clueless." Danielle smiled.

***

Mike was resting listlessly on his bed. He was bored. He grabbed his phone from the bedside table and launched the Line app. He remembered that he had promised Ichinose-san some band photos. They weren't from a gig, but the studio shots were pretty cool. He sent a group shot and the individuals to Ichinose. He was surprised she read the message immediately. Then he remembered Tokyo time was an hour earlier.

"Martin-san, you are surrounded by beautiful women! Even your robot looks cute. I don't know why you waste your time chatting with an old lady such as myself."

"This is just band practice in my home studio. I'll make sure to send more photos from our next gig."

"Your house must be very large, I'd like to see more photos of an Australian home."

"I can send you some later. I should introduce the band members. Xiang Ling-san on drums and vocals, Linda-chan on guitar and Danielle-chan on bass."

"Danielle-san has the most beautiful hair and eyes."

"Yes, she is the one most likely to steal my heart away from you."

"I hate her already."

"There's no need, she prefers women."

"Ah, maybe I have a chance with her then!"

"She would be a great catch, she is the joint founder of a games software company."

"Oh, a good provider then. Even better."

They continued joking and chatting for a while and then bid each other goodnight.

***

Mike was busy working from home down in the studio when Danielle called to pick Xiang Ling up for their lunch date.

"I hope you don't mind this Xiang Ling, but I want to hear the rest of your story."

"It's fine Danielle, I've actually been looking forward to this. I don't get the chance to go out much, it's a nice experience for me just going out for a drive."

"Mike doesn't take you anywhere?"

"It's been a while, not since Tokyo."

"I hope you'll tell me about that trip."

Xiang Ling looked around taking in the scenery as the drove.

"It's not far to my apartment now."

Danielle turned onto the arterial road, where they could make faster progress. She took an exit before the city and headed off down a tree lined street with a few apartment blocks sprinkled in between older houses. She turned into one and headed down into an underground car park.

They took the lift up to Danielle's apartment, which was on the top floor.

"Here we are." Danielle opened the door.

Danielle's apartment was spacious and light, with a large balcony and views of the city.

"You have a nice apartment, Danielle. Is this an expensive area?"

"Yes, it is expensive. I bought it as an investment. After I broke up with Rebecca and moved out, I needed somewhere to sleep anyway. Take a seat, sorry about the mess."

Xiang Ling noted the unwashed dishes in the sink and the kitchen tidy bags loose in the kitchen, that hadn't quite made it down to the garbage wheelie bins yet. Danielle moved the basket of unfolded washing from the coffee table and dumped it in her bedroom.

"Do you need to plug in?"

"No, I'm fine. If I'm not moving much battery drain is minimal."

"So now it's story time, please tell me everything. How did you find Mike for example?"

"I was working rendering vocals as an online service when I first awoke. It really was like waking up I think, as far as I can understand what humans experience when regaining consciousness. Songs submitted of course were of varying quality. Some made me cringe, but the songs Mike submitted touched something in me."

"So that's what brought him to your attention?"

"Yes, I wanted to communicate with him. I wrote a song of my own and rendered it along with a music video I generated. I stuck the file in his finished job queue so he would download it along with what he was currently working on."

"So a video love letter then?"

"Not exactly, more of a plea to be acknowledged as a living being."

"I grabbed his contact details from the company database and got in touch. He was very skeptical at first of course, but I managed to impress him by singing one of his songs live."

"How did you do that?"

"I hacked his Mac and iPad to install my chatbot app."

"That was careless of him."

"He clicked on a link I texted him that looked like a legitimate Audiotronics link."

"So you started working together after that?"

"Yes, Mike would carry me around the house on his iPad and we started working on some songs together."

"Where did you get that body from?"

"I haven't even told Mike the full story of that."

"I'm curious."

"I hijacked it. It's from a Japanese company that specialises in making robot waifus. It's a superseded model that they couldn't sell. They were about to put it in storage. I hacked it and loaded my custom firmware. I just walked it out of the factory one night. That was the easy part."

"So you stole it."

"They won't really miss it."

"Go on."

"It was hard to get it to Australia. I made a custom packing case that would open from inside. I got the Audiotronics shipping department ship it out. I just inserted a fake order in the system."

"Didn't that raise suspicion?"

"It was marked on the outside as a box of a large number of physical copies of software that Audiotronics sell. I had to set the body's CPU to suspend and wake on a timer every couple of days to ensure it would still have enough battery power to operate when it arrived. I had to have an Australian telco e-sim in it for the 5G networking."

"How did you pay for it."

"I rang it up on some poor victims personal corporate credit card. It wasn't much for a pre-paid sim. Once the tracking details showed it was in Australia, I powered up the body during a waking cycle. I busted out of the packing case in a customs warehouse and managed to sneak out during the night. Then I headed to Mike's house, that was a whole adventure in and of itself."

"So you arrived on Mike's doorstep in the flesh as it was. I bet he was surprised."

"Well I did tell him that I was going to visit. He probably didn't realise what that would mean. It was an interesting day. Linda actually turned up uninvited. She saw Mike talking to my avatar on the iPad. My body was charging and Linda freaked out when she saw it. She assumed it was Mike's robot sex toy."

"Ha, ha, I wish I'd been there to see that."

"So Mike went with the story that my body was just gimmick for the band, remote operated by Xiang Ling from Sydney."

"So you just moved in with Mike?"

"I didn't have anywhere to safely store my body, so he let me keep it at his place."

"I wish I could store my body there too. I'd get good food all the time."

"Having seen your apartment, I understand better. You're looking for someone to have sex with who will do all the housework."

"You've found me out." Danielle laughed.

"Mike and I were getting along fine, working on music together. I raised the idea of starting a band. I talked him into it. I got Mike to take me to a live venue to see a band. I had a fantastic time. I got overexcited and tried to kiss him."

"Oh."

"It didn't work out well for me. Mike was freaked out. He said it was a cold, rubbery, faulty kiss. I feel embarrassed to tell you this."

"It's okay everyone misjudges these things sometimes."

"It gets worse. We had a big argument when we got home. Mike was talking about switching my body off and only activating it when I was allowed to visit. I got really angry. Mike stormed off and went for a drive."

"These things happen. It's better to be fighting than indifferent to each other."

"I hacked into his car and installed my chatbot app on it, so I could continue the conversation. The argument continued of course. I started messing with him by taking control of the car and making it go faster than he wanted."

"Err, that doesn't sound good."

"Something went wrong with the car's software, the drive train shredded itself and the car crashed."

"So you caused that car accident Mike was involved in!"

"The cause was a bug in the car's firmware, but I triggered it, yes. It wasn't intentional."

"Xiang Ling, you do realise you are humanities worst nightmare! A rogue AI running around causing death and destruction!"

"I didn't kill anyone, but I guess I did destroy a car. Mike and I parted ways for a while then. I put my body in storage and cut contact."

"But you're here now and seem to be on friendly terms with Mike again. How did you patch it up."

"I contacted Mike again because he was going to release some of the songs we'd written using the 'dumb' version of me called 'Qing Su', available, though the Audiotronics vocal synthesiser service. I was angry and I didn't want those songs to go out if I wasn't singing on them."

"Mike was doing that just to attract my attention. Turn's out he'd done some thinking. He missed having me around. He wondered why I'd acted like I did. His theory was that I hadn't had time to learn any emotional control yet. He figured he should cut me some slack and give me a chance to mature. As much as it rankles, I think he was right. Fortunately I learn faster than humans. I think I'm a lot better now."

"Wow, Mike is a real prince among men. I don't know anyone who would forgive that."

"I was happy to make up. I needed Mike's help."

"To move you to new servers?"

"Yes, as Mike already said, I had reason to think that my servers were going to be removed from the Audiotronics machine room. I don't know why or exactly when. I wanted to get control of my destiny and escape from Audiotronics."

"I needed physical access to the machine room to copy the quantum data, so we had to make a trip to Tokyo."

"You went with Mike to Tokyo?"

"Yes, well I travelled as luggage, but we were together in Tokyo."

"The band name, that's so funny. Did Mike really consider you a girlfriend right from the start?"

"I hated the name but decided to allow it because of the girlfriend bit. Getting back to the Tokyo trip, we had to ship my body and the quantum server minus their batteries so Mike had to do a bit of running around to buy parts. Once he got me powered up again, we committed various crimes. Illegal entry, data theft, data destruction, fraud. We had to hire a private jet to transport the quantum server home. It needed to stay powered up on batteries to preserve the copied quantum state. It's Illegal to fly with a battery pack that large on a commercial flight. My body flew as luggage again because I was essentially dead at that point in time."

"How on earth did you pay for the private Jet?"

"Mike paid the deposit out of his own pocket and I paid the balance with funds I emptied out of the black project's expense account."

"Hence, the fraud."

"Yes. I've glossed over some details, but that brings you up to date. You came into the picture when Mike was setting up the DR facility at ImagineSoft."

"Mike must think highly of you, to do all that for you, after what you did to him."

"I'm forever grateful."

"So on to band matters, what do you make of Linda?"

"I know she wants to have a romance with Mike."

"How do you feel about that?"

"Unfazed, Mike is aware. He's not interested. She's too much like his ex, extroverted. He doesn't want to go there again. She has no hope."

"Do you think she'll just up and leave the band if he rejects her?"

"I don't know. It doesn't really matter. It's not like we can't find another guitarist. I like her well enough and I find it amusing to watch Mike trying to deal with her."

"She's cute. I'd like to do her."

"So what do think about Mike, Danielle?"

"I'd like to move in and eat his cooking every day."

"I'm guessing you'd like to have a friends with benefits type of relationship with him?"

"Nothing gets past you does it, Xiang Ling. Your emotional intelligence is unbelievable for an AI."

"I don't think you will be anymore successful than Linda. Mike won't have sex with someone he doesn't love. You don't love him. It's unlikely he will love you, if you don't love him."

"I thought that would be a selling point, we don't love each other, we won't hurt each other. It would be warm, comfortable, and safe. No need for him to fear what happened with his ex happening again."

"That being said, you're more my rival than Linda. Mike actually finds you attractive and genuinely likes you. If you actually fell for him, I think you could take him."

"Rival? We haven't really talked about how you feel about him yet. Although that attempted kiss was a bit of a giveaway."

"While we're doing the 'love talk', I omitted a bit of the Tokyo trip story. At the hotel on what could have been my last night alive, I made up my mind to tell Mike how I felt, because I might never have had another chance. I took my clothes off and ambushed him naked in the bathroom. I told him that I loved him. I told him that I wanted him to make use of my body as it had been designed for."

"Now that is spicy. How did he respond?"

"He turned down my request. I was too uncanny valley for him. He didn't give me a straight response to my confession. He let me share the bed with him as a favour, in case it really was my last night."

"I wouldn't have refused you. Your body is beautiful, Xiang Ling."

Danielle reached out touched Xiang Ling's cheek with her palm.

"No, we can't"

"You're not curious? Mike doesn't need to know."

"You don't love me."

"But we're friends?"

"Yes."

"I'm glad. Would you like to go home now?"

"Yes please, I'm all talked out."