A Husband and a Wife's First Date

“Just go and kiss the girl!” Akagi belted out the lyrics of a famous song from a certain American animated movie without a care for her captive audience.

Akagi had taken Shinichi and Shuko to karaoke for a date. Although so far, they were more like hangers-on.

However, while Shuko was awkwardly pacified by Akagi’s antics, Shinichi was irritated and starting to get angry.

Once Akagi finished her song, she offered the microphone to Shinichi. “Want to have a go?”

But Shinichi swatted it away. “Get serious! You just expect us to sing karaoke like nothing strange is happening? You better explain what's going on right now!”

Akagi gave a tired smirk. “There isn't much more to explain. You and Shuko are now legally married.”

“That’s impossible! The government can't just decide to marry two people! It's against the Japanese Constitution! In Article 24 it is stated explicitly that marriage must require the consent of both sexes! And I certainly never agreed to this!”

“Do you have the entire constitution memorized or something?” Akagi simpered, her eyes filled with condescension.

“Would there be something wrong with that!?”

“I suppose not, but the constitution is just a piece of paper. When the survival of the nation is at stake, how much does it really matter? Additionally, we did receive your consent.” Akagi pulled out the contract he had signed the night before.

“That doesn’t count! I was drunk!”

“Being drunk doesn’t invalidate a contract. Of course, if you’d like to argue otherwise, you could always fight it in court.” She leaned forward and grinned. “I could even recommend you a good lawyer. He is quite expensive, though.”

Shinichi clenched his fist. There was no way a broke loser like him could fight the government in court. There really was nothing he could do.

Slowly, Shinichi’s gaze fell. This might've been the deepest pit he had ever fallen into.

Akagi, noticing this, tried to cheer him up. “Come on, Shinichi. This'll be for the best. You know, you two have the highest compatibility score we’ve ever seen at 102%. You two are practically made for each other. There’s no way you guys won’t fall madly in love and have like seven kids. You might even fix Japan’s birthrate by yourselves.” Akagi chuckled.

Shuko blushed at the suggestion.

However, Shinichi rubbed his eyes in frustration. “First of all, I don’t even think it’s possible for her to have seven kids.” Shuko looked a bit hurt, making Shinichi feel a pang of guilt. But he still continued, “Second, how is it even mathematically possible for us to have a compatibility rating of 102%?”

“Sshh… Just trust the algorithm, Shinichi…”

All he could do in response was sigh. Turning his eyes to his side, he saw Shuko looking at him.

It was difficult to describe the expression on her face. She was nervous above all else, but there was also something more. Curiosity, attraction, maybe empathy…

Regardless of what it was, Shinichi couldn't help but shoot her a smile in return, a gesture which made her blush and look away.

***

After declaring “Operation Karaoke” to be an abject failure, Akagi took the two to an arcade.

Stopping right in front of a claw machine filled with bunny plushies, Akagi turned to Shinichi. “I command you to win one of those bunny rabbits for Shuko!”

“Huh?” Shinichi stared blankly at her.

“You heard me.” Akagi pointed to the lone pink rabbit in the machine. “That one looks cute.”

Shinichi peered at it. It was about as far away from Shuko’s vibe as was possible.

However, Shuko seemed almost paralyzed by the idea.

Obviously Shinichi knew that it was a trope for guys to win claw machine prizes for their dates, but Shuko seemed way too excited by the prospect.

With a resigned sigh, Shinichi agreed, “Fine.”

“Good.” Akagi handed him a bag filled with coins. “Use as many as you need.”

“All right…” Shinichi put in the money and started to play.

Claw machines always seemed easy, but as he kept missing, the memories of him always failing came flooding back.

Additionally, the pink bunny plushie was in a bad spot. It took several tries just to grab it, and once it slipped out of the claw’s grasp, Shinichi recoiled in frustration.

Throughout each failure and miss, however, Shuko was by his side. Gasping when he managed to hook it and holding her breath as it precariously sat within the grasp of the claw.

Shinichi wasn't thinking about Shuko, Akagi, or the program right now, though. This had become a war. A war between him, the damn claw, and that damn pink rabbit.

Even its stupid, cutesy face was starting to piss him off. Whenever it was in the claw, all he could see was that obnoxious smile, and every time it fell out, it was like it was sneering at him, taunting him.

“Damn it!” Shinichi cried out as the elusive hare escaped his grasp yet again. Grunting, he slammed another coin into the machine.

Shuko was engrossed in the war for her heart that was unfolding before her while Akagi watched the scene with a condescending grin.

“No!” Shinichi slammed down his fist as the rabbit fell out of the claw yet again, landing in an awkward spot. Furiously, he reached back into the bag to pull out another coin, only to feel nothing. Looking, he saw that there was only a single 100 yen coin left.

Shuko gasped at the revelation, but Shinichi gritted his teeth and steeled himself, grabbing the last coin.

But he had blown through who knows how much money on this, and yet he still hadn’t managed to get it. He had to face the truth. At this point, there was no way he’d be able to get it…

“Y-you…” Shuko murmured.

Shinichi’s eyes shifted to his side, seeing Shuko looking at him, her fists clenched.

“Y-you can do it, Sh-shinichi…!”

She blushed hard and immediately looked back at the machine afterwards, but it gave Shinichi a shot through the heart.

He had been on a losing streak for years, maybe even for his entire life, but that would end right now. He would not allow himself to lose here.

His resolve fierce, he took a deep breath and pushed the final coin into the machine.

Three tries was all he had left. He would make sure it was enough.

The pink rabbit was nestled in between two other plushies. An awkward spot to be sure, but he could work with it.

First thing’s first, he had to get it into a more manageable position.

Carefully, he moved the claw over a brown rabbit next to the pink one.

If he spent one try removing an obstacle, it would be much easier to nab the real prize.

As he hit the button, the claw went down, grabbing the brown rabbit partially and moving it away from the pink rabbit. All according to his plan.

At this point, he had a clear path. Aiming for the neck would likely be the best option. Taking control again, he lined up the claw and sent it down.

The claw grabbed the pink rabbit.

Shinichi froze and Shuko held her breath. The seconds felt like hours as the claw moved up and then towards the chute.

But just before the claw went over the prize chute, the rabbit slipped out.

“Damn it!” Shinichi slammed his fist against the glass as he watched that godforsaken rabbit fall on top of the plastic barrier around the prize chute. “I was so close!”

His eyes looked over to the side. Shuko was disappointed, but she was still beaming in anticipation.

After all, it wasn’t over yet… He still had one try left…

Shinichi closed his eyes. This was it. Everything came down to this final game.

He opened his eyes slowly before taking control of the claw for the final time.

While the situation seemed dire, there was actually a strong path forward.

The pink rabbit’s head was already over the chute, it was just his body that was keeping him inside the machine.

He knew exactly what he had to do.

With deliberation, he moved the claw over the rabbit’s body before activating the claw.

The claw plunged down, grabbing the rabbit’s torso. It didn’t have a strong hold, but it didn’t need a strong hold.

Because as the claw moved up, so did the body, and once the body fell through the claw’s grasp, the weight of the head sent the pink rabbit tumbling into the prize chute.

“Yes!” Shinichi pumped his fist as he watched it go in. “Hell yeah!”

Excitedly, he bent down and grabbed the pink rabbit. Its stupid smirk still annoyed him, but to know that he had finally hunted the hare brought him great satisfaction.

“G-good job…” Shuko might’ve still been murmuring, but her excitement could still be felt.

Shinichi looked up at her. He had actually forgotten that he was supposed to be winning this for her. With a relieved sigh and a smile, he held out the stuffed pink rabbit. “I believe this is yours.”

Shuko gasped at the gift, but with shaking hands, she accepted it. “Th-thank you…” she said as she brought it into a hug.

Turning away immediately as he felt his cheeks warm, Shinichi mumbled, “I-it was nothing.”

He had no interest in marrying some gloomy hag, but then why…why did she look kind of cute right now?

Meanwhile, Akagi watched from a small distance away with a knowing smirk. She couldn’t wait to submit her report.