Chapter 10: Autumn Leaves and Scorching Summer

Chapter 10: Autumn Leaves and Scorching Summer

✿———✦———✿

“It’s a hot, sunny day, and it reminds me of the past... doesn’t it, ms. Autumn?“

That afternoon felt a little calmer than usual. Kazuaki was at the office, still wrestling with the massive Taiyoutenshi project that seemed like it would never end. For weeks now, he had been coming home late, too exhausted to do anything but collapse onto the sofa. I knew this was a difficult time for him, but on the other hand, my loneliness was only growing. Even though we were dating now, I could feel a distance slowly stretching between us.

I tried to shake off the supernatural weirdness of the past few days. I forced myself to believe it was just a fever dream brought on by the heavy rain. Kazuaki seemed to be doing the same; we didn't talk about it. It was easier that way—pretending the world was still normal.

I was brewing tea in the kitchen when the doorbell rang. At first, I thought it might be Kazuaki coming home early, though that was unlikely. I quickly walked to the door and opened it, but the figure standing there was completely unexpected.

“Natsu-chan?” The woman’s voice sounded so familiar, and as I looked closer, I realized who she was.

“Akiho...?”

Minato Akiho. Kazuaki’s older sister, who used to go to the same school as me. We had been in the same class from kindergarten through middle school. However, after she moved abroad, I never saw her again. I didn't expect to run into her here, right in front of Kazuaki’s apartment.

“It’s been a long time, hasn't it?” she said with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. There was something behind that smile—a sense of disbelief. She was still the same as ever: elegant, full of confidence, yet there was always a lingering tension between us.

I nodded. “Yes, a very long time.”

“Is Kazu home?” Akiho asked, stepping inside without waiting for an invitation.

I ushered her in. “He’s at the office. He’ll probably be back tonight.”

Akiho looked around the apartment, her eyes tracing every detail as if measuring how her brother’s life was turning out. She took off her glasses and sat on the sofa with ease, as if it were her own home.

“So, you’re the one with Kazu now?” she said, her voice sounding more like a statement than a question.

I swallowed hard, feeling a bit awkward. I knew that Akiho had probably heard the news about my divorce from Miharu, and the fact that I was now living with her brother likely raised many questions in her mind.

“We’re... in a relationship,” I answered softly, trying to remain as formal as possible.

Akiho just gave a short laugh. “How funny. We used to compete in school all the time, but who would have thought you’d end up with my little brother?”

It felt like a sharp sting in my heart. It was true; back then, Akiho and I were constantly competing—from academic grades and competitions to even vying for Miharu’s attention at the time. We were never truly close, though there was no overt hostility. Still, an uncomfortable feeling always clouded our every interaction.

“But, out of all that...” Akiho continued, staring at me intensely. “You look different, Natsu-chan. Something isn't right with you.”

I fell silent. Of course, Akiho always had the ability to see things that were hidden. And right now, I was trying so hard to hide my feelings—the feeling that my life was drifting without a clear direction. Kazuaki was the only anchor I had left, but even our bond felt fragile.

“You must be mistaken,” I said, trying to sound casual. “Everything is fine.”

However, Akiho only looked at me with a scrutinizing gaze. “I’m not so sure. You were always good at hiding your feelings, but I can tell something is wrong. Just tell me.”

There was a long pause before I could answer. A part of me wanted to keep my distance from Akiho, as I always had. But on the other hand, I felt like I couldn't keep carrying all of this alone. Akiho might actually be the right person to talk to, because she knew Kazuaki, and she was mature enough to understand this complicated situation.

Finally, I took a deep breath and sat down beside her. “You’re right. There’s a lot going on... more than you might think.”

I began to tell her everything—from the start of my divorce with Miharu, how I saw him cheating, to how my feelings were becoming more dependent on Kazuaki every day. I told her how empty I felt after losing my marriage, especially since I was currently pregnant... and how I might just be taking those feelings out on Kazuaki.

“He knows,” I said quietly. “He knows I might just be using him as a rebound for my emotions, but he still wants to be with me.”

Akiho listened quietly, nodding occasionally but never interrupting my story. When I finished, she leaned back and stared at the ceiling, as if processing everything I had just shared.

“So, you feel dependent on him, huh?” she finally asked. “You feel like Kazu is the only thing left after everything that happened?”

I nodded slowly.

Akiho sighed. “That’s dangerous, Natsu-chan. Kazuaki might care for you, but I know my brother. He always wants to protect the people he loves, even if it means sacrificing himself. You can't keep weighing him down with your feelings.”

Akiho’s words cut deeper than I imagined. I knew she was right. Kazuaki had always wanted to protect everything and everyone, just as he had since he was a child. But was this right? Did I truly love him, or was it just because I was afraid of being alone?

“You have to find a way out, Natsu,” Akiho continued. “Don't let this relationship leave you both trapped. Kazu might never say it, but I can see it. He’ll burn out if it keeps going like this.”

I lowered my head, feeling the heavy weight in my chest press down even harder. Everything Akiho said was something I already knew deep down, but hearing it from someone else made it all feel more real. I didn't want to hurt Kazuaki, but I couldn't lie to my feelings either.

“So, what should I do?” I asked, my voice barely a whisper.

Akiho looked at me seriously. “Find your answer. Is this true love, or just an escape? You shouldn't make decisions just because you're afraid of being lonely.”

I stayed silent, thinking about her words. Maybe this was the time for me to truly question my feelings and what I actually wanted from this relationship.

A few hours later, after Akiho had gone out to meet some friends, I sat alone in the living room, thinking about everything that had happened today. The meeting with Akiho, the feelings I had never discussed with Kazuaki—it all felt so heavy. There was so much to consider, and I wasn't sure where to start.

That night, when Kazuaki came home, I looked at him with mixed emotions. He smiled as usual, exhausted but trying to stay cheerful.

“What’s wrong?” he asked while sitting on the sofa. “You look a little different.”

I gave a faint smile. “Just a lot on my mind.”

He reached for my hand and squeezed it tightly. “Whatever it is, we can face it together.”

I knew he was sincere, but Akiho’s words kept echoing in my head. Find your answer.

And for the first time, I felt afraid of the answer I might find.

✿———✦———✿

A few hours later. 

Night began to deepen as Kazuaki and I sat on the sofa, just the two of us in the silence. He looked utterly exhausted, his eyes half-closed as he lay in a slightly uncomfortable position. I could feel him struggling to stay awake, trying to give me his attention even though his body was clearly pleading for rest. We had just finished talking about his long day, the office projects, and plans for the upcoming weekend. But my mind was still anchored to my earlier conversation with Akiho.

Somehow, everything felt more complicated. My disordered feelings, this relationship we were navigating without clarity, and a burden that felt increasingly unfair to place on Kazuaki. In that moment, I sensed that everything was about to get much harder.

Suddenly, the sound of the door swinging open startled us both. Akiho appeared in the doorway with unsteady steps, looking as if she had just returned from a rowdy party. Her face was slightly flushed, her eyes bright, and a small laugh escaped her lips—the look of someone who was tipsy but still trying to appear composed.

Kazuaki bolted up from the sofa, staring at Akiho in shock. “Akiho-nee?!” His voice was thick with disbelief. His eyes widened as if he were seeing something bizarre, a sight that didn't belong in his apartment.

Akiho stepped inside, oblivious to our shock. She kicked off her shoes casually and tossed her bag onto the floor before letting out a giggle. “Sorry, just got back from a party. My friends in Kobe really know how to have a good time,” she said cheerfully, as if this were the most normal thing in the world.

However, Kazuaki remained frozen in place. His gaze shifted from Akiho to me, then back to his sister. He looked completely lost. “Why are you even here?” he asked, his tone sharpening with confusion.

Akiho shrugged, wearing a relaxed smile. “I told you, didn't I? I’m staying for a few days. Don't be so serious, Kazu,” she replied with her trademark nonchalance. “There are some issues back at our parents' place, so I figured this was the best spot for me to clear my head.”

Kazuaki fell silent for a moment, clearly unprepared for his sister’s sudden intrusion. He looked straight at me, searching for an explanation. I could only offer a shy, awkward smile, trying to de-escalate the situation.

“I told you earlier this afternoon,” I said softly, trying to explain. “Akiho is going to stay here for a few days.”

Kazuaki’s reaction remained a mix of confusion and slight irritation. He clearly hadn't expected to find his sister suddenly crashing at his place after a party. In his mind, this was our private sanctuary, and Akiho’s presence felt like an unwelcome disruption.

Akiho then sat in the nearest chair, rubbing her temples for a moment before looking up. “Don't worry. I’m not going to get in your way. I just need to rest for a bit before I head back to Mom and Dad’s,” she said lightly.

Kazuaki finally sat back down on the sofa, still looking bothered. “You should have said something before just barging in like that.”

Akiho only laughed, clearly not taking him seriously. “You’re still the same, Kazu. Always so stiff about the small things.”

I could feel the unspoken tension between them. Kazuaki clearly respected his sister, but he obviously didn't appreciate surprises like this—especially while we were trying to navigate a brand-new relationship.

After the tension settled a bit, a half-drunk Akiho finally got up and headed to the bathroom to change. Kazuaki, who had initially wanted to talk more with his sister, could only let out a long sigh, feeling trapped in an increasingly messy situation. He glanced at the sofa where he knew he would be sleeping again tonight.

“I’m on the sofa again tonight, then,” Kazuaki said with a tone of resignation.

I nodded, though I felt a pang of guilt that he had to return to that spot. Over time, I had grown used to Kazuaki’s presence on the sofa, but with Akiho here, we didn't have many options. Akiho would be sleeping with me in the room, at least for tonight.

Once Akiho finished changing, she walked toward the bedroom with slightly wobbly steps. Without saying much, she flopped down onto the bed right next to me, leaving only a small sliver of space. I could feel the warmth of her body, a lingering effect of the alcohol.

“I really didn't expect you to be the one to marry my brother,” Akiho murmured, her voice much softer than usual, her eyes half-lidded. She then wrapped her arm around my waist, pulling me into a tight embrace like a protective older sister.

I gave a faint smile and whispered, “We aren't married yet.” She held me even tighter. I was startled by the gesture but didn't pull away. Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe there was a side to Akiho that actually cared for me, despite our years of competition.

“I know we didn't always get along in school... but I care about you, Natsu-chan. And I know you're going through a rough time.” Her voice sounded honest, stripped of her usual sarcasm or biting commentary. She exhaled slowly, still holding me close. “Miharu is a jerk, a bastard, and a total savage... but you’re going to be okay. You’re stronger than you think.”

Her words echoed in the silence of the room. I stayed still for a moment, feeling the warmth of her hug, and perhaps for the first time, I felt a different kind of closeness with Akiho. Despite our past conflicts, in this moment, she felt like an older sister who truly cared.

Kazuaki, back on the sofa, could only stare blankly at the ceiling. This is going to be another long night, he thought. He was forced to give up the only bedroom to the two women who were simultaneously carrying the heaviest burdens in his life. He pulled up the blanket and tried to sleep, though he knew a peaceful rest wouldn't come easily.

In the bedroom, Akiho gradually drifted off into a warm slumber, while I could only stare at the ceiling, replaying her words in my head. It was a strange night, full of surprises and unexpected conversations.